Your everyday life stories

Ragebait backfire

Melybae - 12/07/2025 14:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I’ve been systematically sharing stories and posts about how love sucks and man-bashing memes so that my crush would regret his decision about rejecting me and choosing another girl over me. He DM’ed me : “Getting tired of your shit Melissa, I’m blocking you.” FML

1 317

Fashion Week

NotAGoodStart - 07/03/2020 14:00 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I went on a blind date, meeting up in a park. I got there first and sat down to wait for him. After a while, a guy sat down next to me. I wasn't sure if it was him, so I texted him, asking if he'd arrived. His response was, "I'm already here, sat to the left of the old woman dressed like a gypsy." FML

2 193

377

Brain melt

coco1234 - 09/03/2020 12:35

Today, I stood there for 10 minutes trying to fix the toaster, until I called my brother to help me. I'd forgotten that it wasn't plugged in. He now thinks I'm a complete idiot. FML

510

1 474

The shot of a lifetime

Epic Fail - 10/10/2022 08:30 - United States - Steele

Today, I tried to throw a basketball in my backyard basketball hoop. It bounced off the board, hit me on the head, then hit a spray can, activating it and spraying black paint all over my Golden Retriever, to finally land in my trash can. FML

905

218

Lightlysalted - 19/04/2018 19:00

Today, I was invited to a special meal for receiving a scholarship from my college. My mom refuses to take me because “your sister’s going there too and didn’t get a scholarship; it wouldn’t be fair to her.” I guess fairness doesn’t apply to me. FML

4 308

240

The opposite of hustle culture

frustrated and chequed out - 12/02/2024 00:00 - Canada - Duncan

Today, I tried to deposit a few cheques in the bank before they expired, and all I needed was the ATM. Little did I know that the bank changed their hours and now closes on the weekend. I’m busy during the week. FML

370

262

Our house, in the middle of our lockdown!

cfails - 02/04/2020 14:00

Today, I found out the house I want to buy is being re-listed, because I can't have an open house to get people to see and buy my current house, because no one can go out in the this fucking quarantine. FML

1 732

249

B-Baller

awkwardballer -

Today, while playing basketball with my new coworkers, I managed to get the ball stuck between the hoop and backboard. In trying to free it, I also got a traffic cone stuck and ended up having to drag a large ladder across the court while everyone watched. FML

10 149

1 724

Sorry, eh?

snakes44 - 27/05/2018 19:00 - Canada - Yellowknife

Today, I let my dog out to go pee before heading to bed. She just stood there and looked at me, so I let her back in and went to sleep. I later woke up to a wet sensation on my back. My dog let out a full bladder all over my bed. FML

3 200

633

Played yourself

nano123 - 17/04/2020 08:00

Today, I gave myself a hickey on my bicep just to know how it feels. I'm a 28-year-old virgin and yes, that's possible. FML

1 627

579

It means he cares

Anonymous - 26/08/2021 23:01 - United States - Roselle

Today, I found out that my boyfriend jerked off more times than he called me when I was out of town for 4 days. Me: 0; porn: 2. FML

531

705

You can't handle the truth!

WhoNeedsFriends - 28/08/2021 10:01 - United States - Staten Island

Today, my friends held a roast for my birthday, as per my request. They went pretty hard and I got a little uncomfortable. Afterwards, I told them that their jokes were a little too far, and they said all of their roasts were 100% genuine, and they just needed an excuse to tell me their problems with me. FML

373

1 646

Stasis

LonelyGrl98 - 15/04/2024 11:00 - United States - Yuba City

Today, I realized how fucked I am (not). I'm a 26 year-old virgin waiting for love. No guy my age wants someone inexperienced. The older I get, the more ridiculous I feel. I masturbate way more often than I should and it's like my body is screaming for intimacy. I don't know WTF to do. Maybe I'll be the next 40 year-old virgin. FML

529

228

Father of the year

Anonymous - 15/09/2021 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband is so emotionally disconnected from fatherhood, he has yet to call our son by his name and instead just refers to him as 'It' or 'That' and occasionally just 'Him'. Sometimes he’ll even ignore him crying and just leave the room because the noise annoys him. FML

1 711

283

Rachel! Emily!

MoreThenFriends - 16/08/2018 22:00

Today, my friend's father got me mixed up with his new wife when telling stories for his wedding speech. Everyone noticed. The new wife was not pleased. FML

3 044

251

Exploited

Anonymous - 23/04/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, we had two of our longest serving coworkers retire at the company I work at, and they hired two young prospects to replace them. The problem? They asked me to train them both for the next 4 months, cancelling my PTO in the process, and then I learned they were being paid nearly 20% more than I am. FML

615

103

Public freakout

Anonymous - 28/09/2021 23:00

Today, we live in a world where 10 people on a bus will ignore a man slapping his wife so hard, she falls out of her seat, yet when that same man has a coughing fit, the same 10 people all get mad at him for not wearing a mask. FML

1 258

155

Coworkers aren't friends

KisstheChef - 28/12/2022 00:00

Today, in an act of friendship, I made chicken curry for a colleague and brought it to work. She looked excited and squealed, "Yum!" When leaving the office at 5pm, she told me she was "taking it to eat at home." But at 7pm, during my routine snooping around for snacks, I found the curry hidden behind a shelf. FML

905

304

Definitely confusing

Anonymous - 05/10/2021 10:00 - United States

Today, I lost my job, neither by quitting or getting fired. I don't know whether to be mad or confused. FML

868

Tinder surprise

Anonymous - 14/01/2023 04:00

Today, a woman turned up uninvited at my house, ready for our first date. After some embarrassed investigating, it turns out my mother signed me up to Tinder and arranged a date, all without telling me, because she refuses to believe I prefer solitude over dating. FML

1 109

130

Grandma's here!

Anonymous - 29/10/2021 14:00

Today, my mother-in-law was so rabid to meet her first grandson, she didn’t just nudge me aside to get to the delivery room, she two-hand shoved me in the chest so I flew backwards and down a flight of stairs. I’m now in a neck brace for a hairline crack to my vertebrae and can’t pick up my own son. FML

1 701

Heavy load

Anon - 18/12/2019 14:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my boyfriend told me that when I orgasm, I sound like I'm choking. Only I'm not choking, I'm just getting the wind knocked out of me by his weight when he is on top. FML

2 288

398

Emergency cooking

YoshiSqu4d - 31/07/2020 20:01

Today, I managed to set off the smoke detectors while cooking burgers. The cops and fire department showed up. FML

1 153

372

Tallie - 01/10/2018 12:00

Today, I fell down the stairs, breaking my foot and tendons. It was the first time I had ever broken anything, and the doctor said that it's the most complicated break he'd ever seen. It's too complicated to operate. Now I'm stuck in a wheelchair for god knows how long. FML

3 195

225

Unaware ableist

Anonymous - 31/08/2020 04:01 - United Kingdom - Leicester

Today, I sat outside for a half hour hysterically laughing at this kid next door for constantly mooing like a cow. My mum came out to inform me the kid is severely disabled. I even mooed back at one stage. FML

693

2 153

Let down

Anonymous - 27/08/2020 05:01

Today, after having spent two weeks planning my husband's surprise birthday party with his friends and family, we get in the car on the way to "dinner" and he says, "I really hope it's just the two of us tonight." FML

1 526

356

Stay safe

notaslut - 08/01/2020 22:00 - United States - Greeley

Today, I walked into my best friend's house and her mom threw a box of condoms at me and said, "Stay safe, slut." FML

2 776

644

horny and alone - 04/11/2018 03:00

Today, I went home with my cute coworker. What started out as a little dirty talk and teasing ended with him admitting he was in a terrible emotional place, then sending me home in an Uber so he could sleep. FML

2 786

425

Game of Thrones 2: Pig in the City

GOT not for me - 15/09/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, I found out my ex lets our kids watch Game of Thrones during his weekend visits. Our kids are 8 and 6. FML

1 335

202

Proportional response

Anonymous - 10/01/2022 11:01

Today, in a fit of rage, my mom confessed to me that I was adopted, and if she had the chance to turn back time, she wouldn't have done it in the first place. All because I ate the last ice cream sandwich. FML

1 661

178

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I received a $50 iTunes card for my birthday. I immediately sat down at my computer and starting buying all my newest favorites. Then I realized I never redeemed my card so the $50 was all charged to my account. FML

11 909

52 578

Today, I was talking to my mom about how my fiancé has been ignoring me and that I didn't know why. Turns out, my mother told him that I was too much of a handful, was mentally disturbed and also cheating on him. Just so I wouldn't move out and would keep cleaning her house for free. FML

56 582

2 902

Today, I was on the internet with my Dad looking up information about allergies. I began to type 'allergies' into the Google Search Box and as I typed 'a', the phrase 'amazing sex positions' popped up as a search I had already looked up. My Dad asked me if any of the positions worked out. FML

15 870

48 695

Today, my girlfriend called saying that she wanted to break up because she wasn't into me anymore. Yesterday, I paid $400 to take her to a Red Sox game, so I asked her why she even came with me. She said that she had been talking to her ex-boyfriend, and he said he was going to that game too. FML

1 895

161

Today, I said something in class and someone mimicked me. In a self-pitying mood, I exclaimed, "Everybody hates me!" The girl behind me then said, "Pretty much." FML

22 542

47 938

Today, my 8 year-old sister tried vaping. My parents found out and planned on yelling at her, but nothing happened. She even got a reward for being curious. When I was 15 and got my first piercing (in the ear) I kinda got beat, and slept outside for the night. It makes me wonder what's going on sometimes… FML

538