Today, I gave myself a hickey on my bicep just to know how it feels. I'm a 28-year-old virgin and yes, that's possible. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I put the vacuum cleaner hose against my neck to give me a hickey, so that it would look like I got some action. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML
Today, I made out with my friend for the first time. He gave me a hickey that can't be hidden. I'm the president of my church youth group and I have to help give a seminar on keeping your body like a holy temple... Tomorrow. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was unsure of the future of our relationship, so he gave me a gigantic hickey to "show the world that I'm his." I work as a cashier and see people I know personally on a daily basis. FML
Today, I got to my human anatomy class with a hickey on my neck. Since I sit in the front row, my professor noticed and decided to call me to the front. He then started talking about ruptured blood vessels and hickeys, all while as I served as the subject. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend a hickey barely an inch from her vagina. She texted me later, saying her dad saw it and had grounded her. So yeah, I'm not sure I even want to know what the hell goes on in their house. FML
Today, as a 26 year-old woman, I had my first orgasm. I gave it to myself. None of my long-term relationships even came close. For almost 26 years I thought I would never have one. FML
Today, I'm nearly 30 years-old, and not only am I still a virgin, I've never even had my first kiss. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over with a hickey on his neck. He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse. FML
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Top comments
spinspinsugar 12
I used to give myself hickeys on my forearm before I knew what hickeys were. I just thought it was cool that you can suck on your skin and bam a bruise appears. gotta love childhood in the 90s. oh and btw, my dad was a virgin until he was 28 and had me 7 years later. you'll be ok :)
cariboucontainer 22
Hey that's absolutely okay, people will find their person in due time (if that's what they're looking for) :)
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Comments (8)
RichardPencil 32
Of course it's possible. If you're a big loser, you can stay a virgin your whole life! Maybe you can pass yourself off as "asexual."
spinspinsugar 12
I have a 70 something year old aunt who's a virgin. however, she's no loser, she raised me when my mom wouldn't bother.
RichardPencil 32
You can be a high quality person and be a loser when it comes to sex. The two are unrelated.
cariboucontainer 22
Hey that's absolutely okay, people will find their person in due time (if that's what they're looking for) :)
spinspinsugar 12
I used to give myself hickeys on my forearm before I knew what hickeys were. I just thought it was cool that you can suck on your skin and bam a bruise appears. gotta love childhood in the 90s. oh and btw, my dad was a virgin until he was 28 and had me 7 years later. you'll be ok :)
AmbrosiaFan 19
Of course its possible but that is just sad. Sad that you had to give yourself a hickey not sad that you are a virgin.
sickerthanyou 13
It sucks, I was a virgin until 25 and it’s awful, but to each their own. Also don’t give yourself hickies, you can die of it
WistayShlaio82 13
I’m 37 and still a virgin, you got a long ways to go and I can tell you’re going to lose it.
nano123 13
Thank you everyone for their lovely responses. Some of the comments have given me great hope that I won’t die same and I am not alone in it. Cheers
Billie-Jo 9
A hickey can cause blood clots.