Miscellaneous: Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come...

By FlyingFist - 04/12/2012 00:38 - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 133

You deserved it 3 452

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Same thing different taste

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 252

You deserved it 2 998

By HaleyIsabelle - 08/03/2010 20:54 - France

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 449

You deserved it 3 708

By Sybille - 06/12/2008 12:14 - France

Today, my boyfriend was laying down on top of me and he was looking at me with passion in his eyes. I thought he was finally going to tell me that he loved me. Instead, he said, "You have a booger." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 511

You deserved it 4 063

Check this out

By Anonymous - 19/12/2010 05:24 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom after he had been in there a while. I found him with his pants down, looking at a pimple on his butt in the mirror. He asked me for, "Help." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 869

You deserved it 4 538

By Whatever479 - 17/02/2011 17:29 - Ireland

Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend asking if I'd Skype with him. Thinking he'd find my tousled bed hair and big t-shirt sexy, I went on. The first thing he noticed was the massive booger on my face that stretched from my nose to the other side of my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 732

You deserved it 37 709

By Anonymous - 10/12/2010 07:17 - United States

Today, I came home to find my 25 year old boyfriend laughing hysterically at his laptop while he made Microsoft Sam say "feces", "penis", and "diarrhea". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 474

You deserved it 8 940

Hey you

By pappy - 03/05/2019 13:00 - United States - Lees Summit

Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 960

You deserved it 308

By Maria - 14/03/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - York

Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 660

You deserved it 398

By unattractive - 18/12/2010 09:32 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend asked me to pick his nose for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 526

You deserved it 6 355

By Anonymous - 28/11/2014 17:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was locked out of my house. As I was about to knock on the window to ask my girlfriend to let me in, I saw her on the sofa, digging a huge booger out of her nose and eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 341

You deserved it 4 647

zingline89 18

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:09

Gives blow your nose a whole new meaning.

raven1911 3

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:16

I hope you have a good reason for staying with this moron

Comments

zingline89 18

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:09

Gives blow your nose a whole new meaning.

luvbughug 5

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:16

You're on a role tonight. No sarcasm!

zingline89 18

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:24

Sweet! What role do I get to play? Can I play Jesus??

rocklare18 7

Wednesday 5 December 2012 6:43

At least he didn't wipe it at the urinal... I heard that's where all the dicks hang out

savage93 11

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:09

A sign for what?

onlychildFTW 33

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:40

He wants done head and god is saying it to. Or that's how I read it.

patrickalamo 47

Tuesday 4 December 2012 10:28

It means he likes penis now.

buckdharma 36

Tuesday 4 December 2012 10:55

Nostrildamus, don't worry, it's snot going to happen.

Harpy20 24

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:11

Well it sounds like he just found his new fetish. Booger-erotica.

jtthegr8 26

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:21

If he thinks that's hot, then he obviously doesn't have high standards at all

Harpy20 24

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:23

13-doesn't take much for some people...

fsomelife 26

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:29

"boogerotica"

zandalee 19

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:30

Fifty shades of snot

Harpy20 24

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:32

21-A vaccine is needed.

BadKitty13 28

Tuesday 4 December 2012 13:08

LOL !!

LiyIa_fml 8

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:12

Wipe the booger on his face.

shyeahh_fml 19

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:15

That's just rude.

doodlecloud 26

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:35

And wiping it on their wall isn't? At least it's actually his, it not like it wasn't already in him a few mins ago anyway.

andrevittorstar 6

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:12

Get the man some Kleenex for Christ sake

kathuzada 6

Tuesday 4 December 2012 10:20

Construction paper is more manly than tissue

BlowinChronic 18

Tuesday 4 December 2012 15:11

34- I use sandpaper.

EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

Wednesday 5 December 2012 3:32

I use bricks

raven1911 3

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:16

I hope you have a good reason for staying with this moron

zandalee 19

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:32

He's unique at least I guess...

ClassyCommando 13

Tuesday 4 December 2012 10:04

Yeah, OP sure knows how to pick 'em.

ks23 9

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:16

Maybe this is your sign to get a new BF

drunkandfml 11

Tuesday 4 December 2012 10:03

Maybe it was a sign that he's gay... then it IS really time to get a new boyfriend

chimocho 8

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:17

Well that's disgusting.

RvidxrKlvn 8

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:18

A sign to become the ultimate master of the art of penis sculpting. From this day forth he will cover each and every bathroom wall, notebook, and your face with only the most detailed penises you have ever seen.

zingline89 18

Tuesday 4 December 2012 9:21

He wanted to share his good news with you and it snot very nice of you to come on here and embarrass him. Who nose how many of his friends will see this? He probably feels like you shafted him and you need to apoligize. Don't be surprised if he's a little teste until you do.