Today, a guy rang my doorbell, yelled "Happy Halloween" and then threw a bunch of leaves that he'd lit on fire at me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, in the spirit of Halloween and to get back at a child who repeatedly pressed the doorbell until I showed up, I quickly opened the door and yelled "Boo!" The child ended up being carried away crying with wet pants by a mother threatening to sue. FML
Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML
Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML
Today, one of the houses had actors with chainsaws. I ran away screaming and slammed into a wall. So much for being macho this Halloween. FML
Today, my friends and I decided to prank the pizza guy. Once he rang the doorbell, I jumped out of the bushes wearing a scary mask and holding a fake dagger. He almost instantly whipped out a Taser and got me right in the collarbone. FML
Today, while up in my room getting ready to go out, I thought I heard some trick or treaters knocking on the door. I ignored them because I didn't have any candy. The knocking got louder and longer. I walked downstairs, and noticed that the living room ceiling was falling down onto the floor. FML
Today, I bought a Halloween fog machine to make my front yard look spooky. I didn’t realize it would set off my house's fire alarm when I tested it before putting it on the front porch. I ended up outside in full costume while firefighters checked my “haunted” house. FML
Today, a kid came Trick-or-Treating at my house. When I told her it was still one more day until Halloween, and that I didn't have any candy, she wound-up her fist, punched me in the groin, and ran off laughing. FML
Today, I saw the pumpkin I had put out for Halloween was starting to get mushy. I went to put it in a trash bag when it slipped out of my hands and burst over my knee. My dog heard the noise, ran into the kitchen and attacked me out of panic. FML
Today, after spending three hours raking leaves, I went to the store to get some supplies. I came back to find my neighbor had decided to blow his leaves all over my yard. FML
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Top comments
tkdgold03 5
how unfortunate.. at least it wasn't shit..
IAMYOURPINEAPPLE 9
Throw some flaming candy at him. Apparently its halloween.
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Comments (142)
tkdgold03 5
how unfortunate.. at least it wasn't shit..
Miss_Kristen 10
Christmas: You're doing it wrong.
LunaDragon 10
I think get hit with shit is better than burned, at least shit can be washed off.
tkdgold03 5
haha but if the shit was on fire..
LunaDragon 10
*Being, Luna you dumbass, I think it's time for you to lay off the egg nog and go to sleep.
imaginaryvoice 18
Was he just holding the flaming leaves waiting for you to open the door? Or did you stand there, watch him put a lighter to a handful of leaves and let him throw it at you?
periwinkle95 10
Random, much?
eyeIoveyou 4
he is two months late :3
Nutty4Muffs 3
What's with all the females in this thread?
crf450 1
ha!! loved it
yahoowizard 16
35 It's never too late to set people on fire
bryans1990 9
I'm picturing a mini leaf blower with a flame thrower effect.
ast3150 13
Move. Now.
JurassicHole 5
You promptly chased down the guy and beat the crap out of him, right OP? That shit is completely uncalled for, like the assholes who throw drinks back at fast food window people. People are assholes. Hope you're doing better though OP.
ragincajun802 0
Damn u fine girl
carlovr435 10
Best…Idea...Ever!
JurassicHole 5
118 - Only if you're a complete and utterly idiotic asshole.
skullcandifiedDJ 5
Merry christmas?
Aceace245 5
Yep a big pile of flaming shit would be worse.
blushy 14
that would be awsome...sorry op
iahntajonera 3
Jaba Saba joong jang
KatieLov3sChu 4
You should've turned around an hugged him before he ran away
iahntajonera 3
Comment not related
StoryOfTheYear 15
I wouldn't want to hug a bastard who would leaf me like that. I, for one, would be devastated.
ImmenseCabbage 0
That's kind of an odd thing to think after reading that FML... Do you hug many strangers?...
flux_panic 18
I wouldn't be so open to hugging someone who tried to hit me with fire leaves..
Dinkle 1
Consider the fact that it was possible that OP was lit on fire, hugging the person who threw the flaming leaves, would burn him aswell, therefore partially getting him back XD
anzie_fml 9
I have to agree with 3. Just because someone throws flaming leaves at you doesn't mean they don't have a need to be loved :3 Maybe he just needs someone to show they care so he won't have to rely on his burning leaves of the Forever Alone tree. *hint: add sarcastic tone to this if you think I'm full of crap.* &D
bball234 6
it would make the most sense if the flaming leaves man took off as soon as he had left them with OP. so how would this hugging happen #3?
tooiecutie 6
yikes
waswashere 0
That yikes is about the creepiness of your smile, right?
cute_cherry1313 1
U r so mean I bet ur just a troll who is way uglier :/
xSonic 9
That was actually very punny :)
Serythvalker 7
Did you tell him to leaf you alone?
zuzupetalsYO 11
You shouldn't open your door to strangers
JadedJarOfHearts 3
They were on fire?!?! Some people are messed.... I'm sorry. Merry Christmas anyways.
lrgenesis 19
Kudos on being the first to wish OP a merry Christmas. I thought op was on fire at first but still it's a wtf kinda thing hahaha. Btw you're really pretty :)
persianjr1 7
If someone threw leaves at me they'd better start running cause id chase them down and make them clean it up!! I'm not gonna let anyone ruin my Christmas.
ashtonkay 7
There's the Christmas spirit! ^^^
connor77_fml 0
I think your cute^^^^
JurassicHole 5
I think you're a creeper. ^^^^
mom0_fml 0
maybe a way of showing that he's a flaming homosexual....?
ImmenseCabbage 0
You are right OP, your life is completely ruined now. FYL. .....NO. FML's just keep getting worse and worse.
MineIsBigger 5
hehehe FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!
Badab1ng 5
How could you thumb this comment down? Respect Beavis and Butthead. It's a classic.
Kefka91 15
I, for one, respect the mighty Cornholio and have given the post a deserved thumbs up.
j_cat187 20
I only read books if they are on fire
IAMYOURPINEAPPLE 9
Throw some flaming candy at him. Apparently its halloween.
trollfaced 2
Op should just said where's my pizza that I ordered, I didn't order burning leaves on my door step
AnagenisisZagus 13
^You suck.
persianjr1 7
^^^ Wtf?!?
ImmenseCabbage 0
Let's be nice...
ladyLALAA 29
^^you suck
DontModMeDammit 10
That takes fire in the hole to a whole new level..
koalaface 4
lol
NanillaVipples 2
Not really...