Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I went to taste some wine with some friends. I drank a little too much and referred to him as my brother to a random guy. Let’s just say I put a strain on my relationship. FML
Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend and my best friend making out. She claimed he was just tasting her lipstick. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were drinking wine naked after sex. He went to get another glass, but on the way back tripped and fell flat on his face. His roommate unexpectedly came home, saw him face-down on the floor, thought I'd drugged him and tackled me before I could explain. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends and my boyfriend met me there. We then decided to come home, planning an intimate moment. Once home, I got on top of him and went to kiss his neck. Next thing I know, I'd fallen asleep right before we'd even started. FML
Today, I was eating pizza with my boyfriend and my friends. I was laughing and talking and went for another piece when my boyfriend grabbed my wrist and said that I had had enough. My friends all backed him up. FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend called me by my best friend's name in bed. FML
Today, while at family dinner, my boyfriend got drunk and told my entire family the things I do in bed. FML
Today, I was in the middle of having sex with my boyfriend, and my drunk best friend knocked on our door. We screamed 'go away' and she still opened the door. She then saw us, and asked if she can join. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me out to a really romantic dinner. Later, I lost my virginity. The chicken was better than he was. FML
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Top comments
ns1985 15
so did he?
TheHarvest 7
bam!!
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Comments (110)
TheHarvest 7
bam!!
countryrose92 23
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Nicely said
jessherself13 21
As in, "Bam! A swift punch to the nuts!"
cb1002630 11
30, personally I thought he was referring to "Bam! Books A Million!" But a swift lick to the nads works as well.
ocramavaf 15
yeah she probably licked his nads
XxDevilxXGt 26
Take it from here Bambam "bam bam bam!" From family guy :D
cb1002630 11
"One o' these days Louis, one o' these days Bam! Straight to the moon"
Snowkeys 11
Emeril Lagasse anyone?
gotaplanstan 28
headshot!!
Nicholi124 10
Oh hell no!!!!!! Someone would have to get punch in the face! And I mean him! Why say shit like that to stir up anger
monique8axel 6
Got em!
ns1985 15
so did he?
enbliss 10
it has to be true, otherwise it wouldn't be a fml
Wizardo 34
Giggity giggity goo ;)
meihua 19
Nah- just the suspicion makes it an fml... And the doubt and insecurities that will result
press_start_bro 21
My exact question...
Catkam623 27
Ops name is everyone heard leading me to infer, she's ******.
Success4444 12
She WAS ******.
Thr33to16 8
Bam!
slacker_69 6
so did he take your virginity and if so what happened next?
IAmJad 18
Have they ever been together or did she cheat on you?
SomeRandomGuy15 18
I think you mistook OP's boyfriend for the OP...
mduerden 18
Re-read and understand first
Obey_StudBoii 23
Fail.
TheRandomIndian 17
Yes because one person pointing out 3s mistake isn't enough.
IAmJad 18
I guess I wasn't thinking straight when I was reading. My bad.
Ki11erC 18
58 - You must be new to the Internet. Welcome.
TheRandomIndian 17
Lmfao oh god you're funny 105
Obey_StudBoii 23
#58 You fail at life.
TheRandomIndian 17
Oh 118, you know me so well
Obey_StudBoii 23
Oh #124 you know I was being sarcastic :)
Soloman212 28
So your verbal irony was meant to convey that #58 succeeds at life?
kay2810 9
That's what he thinks...
Sir_ND_Pity 35
She was half a virgin when she met him?
zombieslayer83 19
They played the "just the tip" game.
sens3sfailing 25
I played that game once.... #shutupitwasmyfirsttime
shortvirgo13 7
Omg #78 that's not funny, wow I can't believe you went there.
Interwebzombie 15
Welcome to the internet, #144, where anything goes.
emmapaige13 6
I love your shirt!
chelsearenaeee 16
He sounds really classy.
ArielTheMermaid 17
It amazes me how many FMLs could be avoided if OP had a sense of humor. Yeah, it's embarrassing, but whether it's true or not, it's pretty funny. And if he did take your virginity, as long as it wasn't during your relationship, in which case it'd be a YDI, just laugh it off and move on
hama806 19
70- we wouldn't have so many fun FMLs to read if everyone had a sense of humor, now would we?
MermaidAnnariea 10
#70, most people, when in a relationship with someone, don't want to hear about their significant others' sexual past. so regardless of whether or not it was before they dated, it's still awkward for OP and her boyfriend.
hashshim 23
Why is she hanging out with her ex in the first place?
tomdrc12 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
And then you poured the drink over his head and punched him in the balls right?
asmari 10
Stud.
ALlamaOnFire 20
This would only really be awkward if what he said was true... So did he?
Steve95401 49
There's nothing like having your girlfriend's "past" thrown in your face.
Obey_StudBoii 23
Lol owned and trolled!