Anonymous
Norfolk, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Fuck
Fowler, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Repetition
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML
apparently inexperienced
Brockton, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML
anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. As soon as I began to climax, he started repeatedly asking, "Are you done? Are you done yet? Are you done?" Well, NOW I am. Thanks, honey. FML
Anonymous
London, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, while we changed positions, he shouts, "Power Rangers - It's Morphin' Time!" FML
erjazo
Morris, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was watching TV with my husband, and he started getting frisky. When the commercial break started, we started having sex. When he came, there were still two commercials left before the show resumed. FML
zstarr
Rome, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Effective
Today, I realized my boyfriend uses sex as a way to get me to stop talking. FML
during
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Narcissism
Today, while me and my boyfriend were having sex, he moaned out his own name. FML
Noname
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML
alexis89
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Oh yeah?
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice, "Oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said, "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML
Top comments
redcliffe 2
Your bf is awesome!
RadikulRam 16
Tell him "We're out of stock."
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Comments (127)
redcliffe 2
Your bf is awesome!
xlord 27
welcome to the bedroom where everything must go!!! take one now and we'll give you a one hour guarantee. this is never to be repeated again!!! not to mention all the free little toys involved ;)
BRLHP 24
Call now and the second pelvic thrust is FREE!!! *just pay separate shipping and handling*
racerapj 10
But wait, there's more! Act now and a handy will be thrown in. Absolutely Free!
PinkieKeen 20
BF: Wait, there's more! OP: Pull out then! BF: That's not what I ment.
klovemachine 24
1 - "I agree." "Circle gets the square!"
Axipiter 24
I say that to my girlfriend EVERY time she agrees or disagrees with me! Drives her crazy!
Sandman366 6
11-Mumble more to get "everything must blow".
XtraEzeee 8
"meanwhile, under OPs bra.."
XxFA1LxX 4
yes, he is! and if you liked the little Schticky you are going to love the big Schticky. oh god just imagine him.
RadikulRam 16
Tell him "We're out of stock."
evanvoss 20
Then he'll fill up her inventory ;)
Windv 12
Call now while stocks last!
ImaSnowman 2
Boooo
Feklfekl2222 32
At least there was more?
TourettesGuyFTW 26
"Thank you, come again.... & again..." ;-)
pcentral 17
"All this can be yours for just ten payments of $199.95"
DJKAYREZZ 4
Haha
cianericryan 0
Heyy how can i private msg you? Do u have kik?
BntyHntrSeattle 30
More like infinite payments of $69.00 ;)
challan 19
He wasn't really offering sex with a payment scale. Your desperation is soooo attractive. Wow, ladies, have some self respect and worth.
Slender_Man 6
Damn! What is that? A hooker?
coughyochick 7
FEMINIST ALERT!! RING THE ALARM AND SOUND THE MACHINE!!!
BigShOtz07 5
"If you have sex with me now, you will get double for the price!"
apppiiee 5
No
expertsmilee 26
34 - Dat face
ManInTheMachine 20
Boyfriend: And for the next THREE-that's right-THREE minutes only, you can fake an ******, so hurry, while loads last! OP: Oh god... Hey, at least he's making it interesting.
Blackmail111 9
Am I the only one who gets annoyed when they put a timer on infomercials that aren't live? I mean, if you give us a timer on cable television for the sale then that's just ridiculous because the timer restarts everytime the commercial is played. Oh well. Stupid marketing tricks I guess.
my2centsworth 15
Not available in all sizes.
patrickalamo 48
But wait he'll double the offer... Your having twins...
pcentral 17
*You're And yes, it does make a difference.
JustKittyKat 24
Your boyfriend sounds hilarious. I would be too distracted with laughing to get into the intercourse though. Lol
AKGirlinSD 20
I was thinking the same thing, 12. I'm impressed if the Original Poster's boyfriend could keep it hard while talking like that.