Today, I went on a date with a guy I met online. While cuddling on the couch, he asked me for a blow job. I refused. He said, "But I thought big girls liked doing that." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML
Today, I went on a date with my crush and I was so desperate to impress him, I talked him into a blowjob, after he turned down full sex since it was only a first date. He asked me to stop halfway through, because apparently I have bad technique, and hurt him with my teeth. He left. I’m such an idiot. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML
Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said, "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
Today, I went on a first date. Everything was going well until he asked me, "So, what's the biggest thing you've stuck up your vag?" FML
Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML
Today, having regularly given my husband blowjobs, I suggested, mid-session, that he could maybe reciprocate. He complained that I was wet, begrudgingly licked for about a minute and then gave up. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted a blowjob, shortly after we've started dating. He said to be careful because he blows a massive load. Thinking he's full of crap, I rolled my eyes and got to work. Had him going and then a massive load shot down my throat and a bunch of fire hoses sprayed out my nose. It burned so bad. FML
Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML
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Top comments
emjoy 0
That is horrifying. I hope you ended it there
causelifehappens 0
haha, what did you expect you met him online.
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Comments (70)
nunnie 0
I agree wit #7 lol
marycharles 0
haha #11 true dat
Bella910 0
I mean u met him online soo..
GeneralDisarray6 0
were you offended at the fact that he asksed you for a bj or the fact that he made you realize your fat? maybe if you start sucking **** and stop eating twinkies and hot dogs all the time you would loose a few hundred pounds fatty.
bcubed 0
lol. my favorite comment.
adonals 0
WOW hahaa dont look for dates online; they are usually dbags... but that is super funny FYL is right lmao.
davidhasmorefun 0
what did you expect from online dating? your a desperate fat girl dating online. no need to add that you're a prude too.
Ottoman81 0
u were cuddling on the couch. probably messing around. of course hes gonna expect more. u already brought him over on a first date. u should be happy ur fat ass even had a date
alicia_was_here 3
i agree with all the people that say to avoid online dating to avoid dbags. i agree dbags are in real life, but with the internet they can say things without consequence, like all of you dbags that say she deserves it because shes fat. OP fyl that situation sucks.
love_game911 0
@11 Im with u 100%
sunshine86 0
what a scumbag