We're bad at this

By Anonymous - 12/08/2014 20:24 - United States - Chandler

Spicy
Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML
I agree, your life sucks 49 472
You deserved it 12 042
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Top comments

everton99 16

At the rate the post was going I truly thought he was going to say "and then I discovered she really was dead. FML"

311 2

Comments

worldclassrager 39

Vitamin E is the key to have better sleepy... I apologize for the lame pun...

1 11
worldclassrager 39

No...in the **** industry they recommend vitamin E for a higher sperm count...vitamin D works as well but E is more effective...

2 2
shanannygians07 28

If you wore a condom she wouldn't notice the lack of cum? if you didn't ydi

30 4
FYlife604 18

Pretty sure condoms are clear and that its kind of hard to miss a big white blob in a used one...

1 0
mommy2cassidy 18

He blamed the lack of semen (aka cum) on a botched vasectomy...

1 0
kacironi 13

what did you expect when hooking up with a girl at a club?

18 5
martin8337 35

I guess that "dead girl sex" is better than no sex at all..

11 5
picturescrazy 24

You should wear a condom with chicks that'll **** any random dude they meet at the club, OP! YDI

26 4
cjwayy 22

That doesn't make any ******* sense.

4 0
x_the_lancer_x 13

Your comment makes me feel ashamed to be 14, seeing that you are the same age. I could have shit a better comment about this post, especially one that would have actually made sense.

4 9
BeepBeepSwerve 9

#53:oh my god you're 14 and can make a better comment wow...what do you want an award?

7 2
thenamesjan 13

She was probably really loose, if you know what I mean

0 9
superdom 12

I hate how people criticize about sex so much it's just so personal with me :/

5 6