By checkup - 15/07/2012 00:50 - United Kingdom - Redditch

Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 302
You deserved it 5 077

Same thing different taste

Top comments

DKjazz 20

I just love the wording of this FML.

sunnyt 5

Genital warts.. still the girl of your dreams?


sunnyt 5

Genital warts.. still the girl of your dreams?

I chose her BECAUSE of the warts, so yes.

the_anti_hipster 7

So she's a bitch and she has the vag warts! I bet her parents are SO proud. (PS: it's better to be a virgin with class than a bitch with an attitude problem. oh yeah, and a pesky STD...)

You're* as well. Someone has to do the dirty work. :D

jojimugo 20

I did not see that coming .... Almost fell out of my chair

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Are you kidding me he obviously dosent want to be a virgin how can he be proud of that.

It's treatable, she should get on get them burned off like regular warts. Very low chance of transmission if she does that and then uses a condom every time and keeps an eye on herself for outbreaks (and then gets them burned off again if they pop up).

daisiebud 18

Mhm. She deserved it, too, for not telling him beforehand.

He never said he didn't want to be one... Read it over again, genius. These days, virginity is like a rare gift... Seeing how people loose it so soon

#78: What comment are you correcting? :s

Hey, nightmares are dreams too! ;)

DKjazz 20

I just love the wording of this FML.

BrysGirl27 14

Just what I was thinking haha everything is all rainbows and butterflies...but then the genital warts come up:p what a mood killer haha

hockeyoceancity 13

72- I'm sure OP is thinking the same thing!

Yeah lol I read it all from top to bottom... Then I was like woah woah woah!! Did I read that right ?? OP there is no shame in being a virgin. I personally prefer being a virgin than a ***** hound. You'll find that perfect one some day.

gmc_blossom 21

72- We all know that, "It's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves us along." Looks like they didn't compromise. 0.o

beccaishereyay 11

119- wise words from Adam Levine :) 2- I loved the wording to! When I got to genital warts I had to stop and go back because I thought my brain was ******* with me. Haha

Captain_Zorro 7

^^Me too! I was reading then I saw genital warts...I was like wth?? I had to go back and reread haha.

Im very sorry you had to experience that

reallytho3 11

He shoulda checked the car facts if you know what I mean ;)

She must also be the girl of many other guys' dreams.

hockeyoceancity 13
BryanThaMan 14

this is just as bad as those idiot comment spell checkers who go at it as if it's their jobs, smh...

379_fml 11

By sounds of it she's been around enough there should be a cuntfax report just like a USED car

There are four car fax references in this comment stream...... Next time yall should just copy and paste.

57, If by "enough" you mean "once," which is all it takes.

Harsh comments when we can't even be sure they're genital warts. How many virgins do you know that can accurately identify an STD from what is possibly a natural phenomenon? You'll find all kinds of non infectious, naturally occurring abnormalities on people. We also don't know that she didn't get them as a result of a single long term relationship. But hey, I get it, closed mindedness under the guise of intelligence is all the rage these days, so have at it!

Probably would of been more sorry of he actually caught it (:

Maybe he wasn't a virgin and she just thought he was inexperienced, so said that.

hockeyoceancity 13

No way, pigs are awesome. They're bacon. She's....a sperm dumpster.

137's got it right. To many sperm donors for that bank!

I would eat a pig, no way in hell wo

BryanThaMan 14

Guess you jumped the gun without doin your research there buddy! Somehow I still feel slightly bad though, that sucks

Daftendirekt1 0

True but to be fair, chances are she wouldn't let it be known that she has genital warts. He probably went in without knowing. Other than that, 100% agree.

Ask her if she even gets any with the grotesque genital warts.

nikkimizu 12

Yes, how dare you for not wanting to get her genital warts :P

Licky, Licky, Licky like a peppermint swirl....... with warts

Daftendirekt1 0

26 - That is somehow surprisingly graphic...

MustangGirl72 9

Please tell me that was supposed to be sarcasm.

dsbs 9

Condoms don't protect you from stds

Please tell me you're being sarcastic or I'll be forced to assault your Sex-Ed teacher.

Yes 162, because condoms being the neat form of prevention of stds is just a myth made up by advertising agencies to make you spend your money...

hockeyoceancity 13

I'll be a virgin over having gential warts anyday.

But I mean if you only had ONE chance ever to have sex (hypothetically) then would it matter ?