We're bad at this

By Anonymous - 12/08/2014 20:24 - United States - Chandler

Spicy
Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML
I agree, your life sucks 49 472
You deserved it 12 043
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

everton99 16

At the rate the post was going I truly thought he was going to say "and then I discovered she really was dead. FML"

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Comments

amisenho 11

So you're complaining that you were actually able to pick a woman up at a club and have sex with her? Then you lie to her about having a vasectomy and complain that she believed you? Sounds like you're quite the spoiled brat.

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Chambers1985 13

maybe she didn't enjoy it? not into it or sizeeee matters!

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TrinityNevada 11

My thinking is that she really didn't want to have sex and she just wanted to get it over with. When I was young and stupid, I would grind all over some guy in a bar or club or at a party I would be all over him. then, because he thought I was offering something (or because I wasn't thinking straight) he would glue himself to my ass all night and not go away until he could pull me into a bedroom or my "friends" would invite him to come home with us (or encourage us to get a room). Having sex with the guy was the only way to shut him up and get him to leave me alone. That was my bad - I felt "safe" and "in control" as long as we weren't going to be alone together. I think she was drunk, after having fun with you and after the ego-boost/attention. She wasn't thinking that she was stringing you along and not a big enough jerk to drop you and not woman enough to tell you she was only playing. Unfortunately, I know a lot of women who did that, not realizing what they were getting themselves into. Most women I know, when they just lie there, aren't really into it and just want it over with. I would stay away from one-night-stands and FWB because most women I know couldn't/can't handle it. True for everyone? No, but true for many

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rambleramble3 11

103, but it is a site where people get to express their thoughts about other people's posted misfortunes, you ass.

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azyjazy713 11

Maybe she laid there like a corpse b/c she's dead inside...which is also why she let you hit after knowing next to nothing about you.

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miss_amphetamine 24

Both of you suck at sex. Talk to her during it? Ask her what she likes? She should be doing the same. Maybe there wasn't enough foreplay beforehand, and she couldn't get into it; maybe she was drunk. Either way, it sounds like you two didn't communicate at all.

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TrinityNevada 11

whatever she didn't want to bone

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