By Anonymous - 25/06/2013 17:16 - United States - Surprise

Today, while walking around town, some guy grabbed me from behind, clutched at my nipples, and said, "That's where I always imagined they were." FML
I agree, your life sucks 57 147
You deserved it 4 289

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Kick him in the balls and say "just where I thought they would be too"


Wait, you don't do that?

I thought grabbing people's nipples from behind was a polite way to say hello.

What a weirdo-o-oooo.

On her under-boobs? That's where I would have checked next.

QuinnyZebrass 11

Op is a man

Well shit. I was not paying attention to gender this time. I guess the next place to check would be his dick. Or HIS underboobs if he's a fatty.

@66, why are you guessing only the genitals?

#32 Cool story...needs more o's!

Snatch his balls with a knife and say "thats what I always that they were" :)

#66 this time? uhu...

That's just messed up

Damian95 16

Oh so when he does it all that happens is an FML is posted about him. When I do it everyone in the theatre flips shit and I get kicked out with a police threat...

Allennis44 16

I mean, where else would they be?

Kick him in the balls and say "just where I thought they would be too"

Is there more than one place for nipples that I didn't know about?

ripresno 10

There are many places for nipples. There are many uses for nipples. Just ask any guy...

I feel like I've been missing out on some important things...

Bewbies.. O_e They're fun to have! XD

InfamousRaider 15

If thats what you want to think.

ginawater19 13

#83, grow up. How are boobs fun? I mean for a girl anyway.. Bras fucking suck and it's not like I'm gonna play with my boobs. That's really weird for a girl to say. Respect your body.

@152, who are you to judge a girl for loving her boobs? She's respecting the hell out of her body by liking it. A woman's curves are awesome, not something to hide or be ashamed of having. They can be a pain in the butt at times like you said, but don't shame anyone for loving theirs. Boobs are great! (As are no boobs, small boobs, big boobs -- as long as you love your body, it's awesome.)

How are you respecting your body by not loving it? I for one love my boobs (that was weird but oh well) practice what you preach.

FUCK YEAH! That's how you do it.

That's just wrong

But it feels so right!

It's an FML for the guy who's never felt boobs!

OP is a guy not a girl, unless they have more to love he wouldn't have boobs. But when I was reading this FML I assumed he was a girl too until like 5 seconds ago when I clicked on it and saw the blue male sign

Ah ha, well then the creep has still never felt boobs!

Where do all these weirdos come from?

I think 17 was referring to where OP is from.

lifesucks1217 6

people always blame the u.s for anything no matter what...

vegeta77 4

Yes, the US because we some how put out a homing beacon for every foreign weirdo.

crazytwinsmom 25

OP is in Arizona and the heat fries people's brains.

Loooool I think I agree with that one xD

When a mama weirdo and a daddy weirdo love each other every much they decide too... Jk! Maybe it was a dare but anyway that really sucks OP

The freaks come out at night

Only one "L" in Walmart, mate

flashback.miss 28

Should've wheeled on him and crushed his dick. Or given him a purple nurple.

or showed him ur profile pic.

Aaah damn, that is exactly what I was thinking! What the fuck IS that??

you should report him to the police for sexual assualt

Your raised finger gives you so much authority :O Bow to the supreme ruler!!!

Damnit #55, she hurt her finger. HER FINGER. She needs that for doing finger stuff.

RedPillSucks 31

OP: wait right here while I get the police. They'll bring you to a place where lots of people will explore where nipples might be. ... Hey! Where're you going?

what finger stuff...

And then you socked him right in the face, right?

flockz 19


Are you implying that the mystery nipple grabber is a ballchinian?

rg350dx 29

Get an officer to slap some handcuffs on him and let him imagine where his next sexual encounter in jail will come from.

given his moob-grabbing, I suspect he might actually enjoy that.......

Your picture matches perfectly with your comment.

jojimugo 20

Buy a whistle .... That's just beyond wrong

vegeta77 4

Pepper spray hurts more.

Taser to the balls? I mean the one you shoot with little barbs on it!

ginawater19 13

Hahaha the rape whistle!

OP is male, there's something even more wrong if they have to carry a whistle :s