Today, while my girlfriend was going down on me, she looked up at me and said, in a high-pitched voice, "Yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy!" FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend was giving me amazing head. I was really getting into it, when she looked up, and gave me a thumbs up. I can never take oral sex seriously again. FML
Today, I was doing it with my girlfriend. Trying to be sexy, I moaned her name. She replied, "What?" FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a blowjob. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "What's that thing at the back of your throat called?" FML
Today, I went down on my girlfriend after sharing a romantic moment. As I was licking, she giggled and said, "You sound like a dog." Romance ruined. FML
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML
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Top comments
pleura 0
Shut up, at least you're getting head.
Thatk1ddd 0
That's just, awkward...
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Comments (156)
KingHumanity 0
And your life is ****** because your girlfriend feels sexy, likes giving you ********, and like how you taste? F___ you.
KingHumanity 0
*likes*
prizefight 0
You got oral regardless so...shut the **** up.
ragsy 7
Push her head down so she can't talk.
Spastro 0
what's wrong with that. she likes munching on some ...... that's hot.
ninjobliveus13 0
Dude, that's pornolistuc! I wish I could have gotten my ex wife to say that! Not FYL. You should be tarred and feathered for suggesting a woman who swallows is anything but awesome. One that likes to no less. I just started hating you.
jcp012000 5
Relax man. Apparently you get none at all!!
DenBriZel 31
How does him being divorced mean he doesn't get sex? There's other women out there!
ILoveMyLifeSoMuc 0
thats what she said
weedking 0
Wow. Clearly NOT an FML. Douche.
riketbal 0
Where is the FML?
Erindub 0
You sir are insane!
perdix 31
One "yummy" might be amusing, but five in a row is penile neglect. His dick probably got cold while she put on her little freak show. She needs to keep her head down and focus on the job at hand. After she swallows his load of ****, she can say or do whatever the hell she wants.