Intimacy: Today, while in the middle of giving my husband a blow job, I...

By suffersecks - 20/01/2012 23:54 - United States

Today, while in the middle of giving my husband a blow job, I looked up to see him staring into space and vigorously picking his nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 636

You deserved it 6 187

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By blushingbride - 09/02/2014 21:59 - United States - Alpharetta

Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 363

You deserved it 4 442

By spaceavery - 24/09/2016 04:53 - United States - Gresham

Today, I was having amazing sex with my husband. When he blew his load, he also blew something else - a giant glob of snot, directly at my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 240

You deserved it 1 574

By C0r1nn3 - 07/06/2012 04:02 - United States - Santa Clara

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 799

You deserved it 5 065

By Maria - 14/03/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - York

Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 660

You deserved it 398

By Anonymous - 17/08/2012 13:31 - United States - Newberry

Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 406

You deserved it 6 880

By Qwerty - 28/06/2011 16:10 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 986

You deserved it 5 279

By unattractive - 18/12/2010 09:32 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend asked me to pick his nose for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 528

You deserved it 6 356

Surprise !

By snottyface - 26/09/2009 03:47 - United States

Today, I was trying to sneak up my husband while he was playing a computer game. As I was getting behind the chair, he paused the game and sat up straight. I stopped. He turned around and sneezed violently and blew a bunch of snot into my face and eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 792

You deserved it 19 470

By eeewww - 21/11/2018 03:13

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend and he ejaculated without warning, shooting straight up my nostril. I accidentally snorted it, started choking, and then coughed it up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 443

You deserved it 796

Underperforming

By ThatIsNotIt - 24/01/2021 04:02 - United Kingdom

Today, having regularly given my husband blowjobs, I suggested, mid-session, that he could maybe reciprocate. He complained that I was wet, begrudgingly licked for about a minute and then gave up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 409

You deserved it 167

Savra_fml 17

Saturday 21 January 2012 1:50

First he puts on dirty underwear after a shower, and now this! Stop giving head OP!

nick347b 6

Saturday 21 January 2012 1:50

He's enjoying it. Trust me, I'm a guy.

Comments

mikepattonfan 0

Saturday 21 January 2012 13:32

Lucky bastard....I have to beg for BJ's

Courtney_Sanders 6

Saturday 21 January 2012 13:59

If he is that bored while you are going down on him, then you're definitely doing something wrong. I would suggest asking him how he likes it. Or go watch some **** and take notes!

burnsie22 5

Saturday 21 January 2012 14:16

Slap his sack

BostonBruinsFan 8

Saturday 21 January 2012 17:33

Perfect!

EduJav321 24

Saturday 21 January 2012 15:04

A bite might get his attention

MrC922 0

Saturday 21 January 2012 16:47

#StepYoGameUp lol that's funny AF

CradleLeena 0

Saturday 21 January 2012 17:08

Thats when u stop and tell him 2 finish by himself

BostonBruinsFan 8

Saturday 21 January 2012 17:18

Thanks!!

goose831 0

Saturday 21 January 2012 17:28

Wow slacking on your skills much!

Skills69 0

Saturday 21 January 2012 18:39

Doesn't matter gave head

kristen69 0

Saturday 21 January 2012 18:53

If he's staring into space and pickin his nose then ur doing it wrong. Plus he shouldn't be all in his nose u should slap him for being so nasty.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I have no sex drive, but faked it to avoid hurting his feelings. It was after he confessed he is not attracted to women, but forced himself to have sex with me because he didn't want to admit he is gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 208

You deserved it 3 632

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house for the first time. I cracked a joke that offended her, so she gave me the silent treatment. I had to pee, and since she wouldn't tell me where the bathroom was, I went to look for it. I walked in on her parents making love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 246

You deserved it 7 781

The Top

Today, my car got stolen. While I was standing ten feet away from it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 734

You deserved it 7 179

Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 036

You deserved it 3 384

Today, I found out there's nothing like getting dumped and then receiving an inadvertent Snapchat sext from your ex-girlfriend that was intended for her new boyfriend, on what would have been your anniversary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 574

You deserved it 147

Today, I accidentally dropped my birth control pill. My cat ate it before I could pick it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 347

You deserved it 2 785

Today, I was playing Draw Something with my girlfriend, when I decided to start a game with some other people. She immediately accused me of "cheating" on her, and still refuses to talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 151

You deserved it 4 973

Today, I was working my lifeguard job when I had to remind a 17 year-old boy that water is clear and that I could see him pulling his trunks down to moon his friends. Kind of want to drown myself now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 76

Same thing different taste

Surprise !

Underperforming

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