By lonely - 12/04/2010 00:27 - United States

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses were at my door. Normally I don't give them the time of day, but I was so lonely for company, I let them in. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 019
You deserved it 7 726

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aww. go to chat roulette. make friends, meet penises. :D

hmm. idk, I say, maybe make a few friends, get laid, quit jacking off to night elves dancing on world of Warcraft, and hmm yeah that ought to work

Comments

Fuck, I know the feeling. I'm sitting in the basement whacking the cum right outta my balls as I type this. Wish my mum would come help, but we can't all have what we want. Pfsh.

not a bad idea, some of them give good head if you ask nicely.

Jehovah witnesses? dude, that really sucks. FYL!

hmm. idk, I say, maybe make a few friends, get laid, quit jacking off to night elves dancing on world of Warcraft, and hmm yeah that ought to work

15 That made me laugh so hard....lol

I slammed a Jo-Hoes hand in my door once, cause I said no thank you and when I was closing it he stuck his hand in so I slammed it really hard.. and proceded to yell god is a fucking lie, and mary is a dirty hoe. but really why stick your hand into my house after I say no thanks bye and start shutting it. friggin retards.

just to let you smarties know, the OP is a girl

lol i love these comments =)

jehovah's witnesses are nice.

her pictures hot.... but you never know if that's really her

good on ya. did they ever come back?

omg I wrote a comment and now it's gone. they have came back a couple times.. and I just make sure my dogs come to the door with me.. my pittys :) than they don't put there feet or hands into my door when I'm shutting it.. and if your talking to me that is me in my picture look me up on facebook if ya don't believe it lol. profile picture has dirty blonde hair and im on a swing I dyed it. my name be Kristie Middlton.

Middleton**** sorry stupid iPhone

sugarbaby, I hope one of these days the dogs try to attack one of them and then you get sued and have to put them down.If you don't want to talk to them don't answer, but don't treat them like shit just because they knocked your door...you are acting like your a hero trying to slam the door on their hands. SMH, fucking people now a days

fuck you man, my dogs won't attack then. they are not trained to be attack dogs. they look scary though. and yeah I will slam the door on someone if they put there arm in my door and bitch about the fact I need to be there religion.. so actually if my dog were to attack them. they came into my house, technically my dogs are protecting me. but they wouldn't even bite them. maybe they shouldn't come to my damn door anymore.

If you tell them to not come they won't, there might be some that still will but many won't...look you have every right to defend yourself but don't glorify that you were happy hurting them....To not have any problems just don't answer the door

... they come to my door like 3 times a year I have asked them. I called the church in my town and said please don't come to my house because I am agnostic and I don't want people coming to my door and preeching at me thank you very much. and I told him this is my address don't come here. they still do. sorry you don't think it's funny. it WAS funny at the time. sorryy it wasn't even funny i was so annoyed that i didn't give a shit. and I really still don't care. they keep coming back. when you don't answer the door and they know your home they stand on your porch. or come back like 20 times that week. maybe it's not like that where you live.. but my home town is so small. that it takes 45 minutes to walk clear across town from the south east end to the north west end. so they can walk all over town like a milllion times a day. lol. I'm just saying. it's stupid that they continue to come back all the time.. why come back when I have said no! don't come back here.

not an fml you probably made their day since noone ever listens to them.

Yeah you are right that they should stop coming by if you told them times, but from what my aunt told me they still come back every now and then to see if you changed your mind

I've had Mormons come to my house ._.

yeah but seriously it's litterally 5 times a damn year lol. they come like 3 months on the summer/fall.. and randomly they show up in the middle of winter when it's like minus 100 outside. why go to most of these houses and freeze your ass off when the answer will be no. it's just my opinion. I'm to outspoken to deal with religion. especially over such a drama filled website like this. I can barley debate over it with people in a normal sittuation without getting super agravated. lol so I'm done talking about J/W... I'm to yeah haha I can't talk about this and stress myself out over something on fml. at least as long as snickerdoodles isn't involved. I miss fighting with the Ginger. (Gingers have no souls... kassemG :)) lol sorry for writing a novel ladies and gents.

tweetbaby14 18

so was prince there( the singer who admitted to being one)? if not then ydi

ouch babydoll ! lol

shut up sugarbaby, your 19, you either still live with your parents or you live in a dorm. Either way quit trying to act hard.

at sugarbaby Regardless of how often they come to your door, or how persistent they are to get you to listen, slamming a door on someone's finger is not something to be proud of. I know they won't leave you alone and blah blah blah, but how about putting a sign up on your house that says 'No solictiation' or simply not answering your door. There's a mature path and an immature child's path. I hope you pick the right one next time. And the record, the JWs come to my house just a often as they do yours. On the off chance I do answer the door, I politely say no a few times and close the door. Then again, I guess you're too important to show another human being respect

Thi is more of a MLIA. (My life is average).

@ sugarbabyxoxo You are a reprehensable human being. Witnesses do nothing but try to encourage people to read the Bible, we don't expect to convert you at the door. If you had slammed a door on my hand you would be propmtly sued for all the damages and the pain and suffering. Also, no matter where your dog attacks a solicitor, even in your house, it will be classified as vicious and put down and you will be liable for civil and criminal prosecution. Just tell them not to come back or is it just impossible for you to be a decent person.

I'm not a JW but why do you have to say that GOD is a lie and that the vergin MARY is a dirty hoe that's just messed up I mean I don't think they think anything of the vergin MARY they just say that's Jesus mom, and I think you cam out looking like a tard cause you yelled it out at the end they probaly left saying what a effing crazy bitch

heyy sugarbaby. . . its funny how you can talk all that crap right now but let me tell you something, J.W are people & human beings with feelings and just like YOU, they arent perfect but they have made an attempt to change their lives so you might have gotten away with slamming someones finger in your door but the next time you try to pull some crap like that, I hope you meet someone with a zero tolerance level. You need to wake up and realize that its things like that in which they are trying to prevent. It's people like you who make life difficult for absolutely no reason. But trust and believe me when I say, you are not the first or the last person to do something as stupid as this && your dogs wont faze some people. Many of us have been bitten time and time again but we're still out there preaching and helping those who need help. I bet you don't even read your bible. SMH. And you know what, if you were as big and as bad as you are making yourself seem, you wouldn't hide behind your door or your dogs for protection, rather you would shut your mouth and listen to what they have to say before you can form your own opinion. I bet you've never taken a magazine AND read it or attended a meeting in your LIFE. So until you do so, I suggest you grow up and STOP acting like you're some kind of hero for what you've done. ~New Day

@ cucuto89 get your facts strait. (I posted a comment it's gone now...) I have been out on my own since 15. And had my own place at sixteen. Still have it. So stfu and assume anything about me. And to whoever said that shit about my dogs. Yeah ANY dog would fucking attack my moms teacup poodle is more viciouse than both of mine put together.. I get mad when I see dog fights. It's discusting. So what makes you assume all this stuff about me. My dogs won't get taken away. Bythe way everyone replying to me lives in the fucking states and the laws are way different about every single thing. I'll do what I want in my house. And if some little goof rats and tries to get me in shit. Well rats are a dying breed so fuck all a y'all! Drop it and don't even reply to me because I won't answer.

Oh and @ itsanewday... Correction O don't read the bible. Last time I was near a bible I ripped a page out to roll a joint in, when I was 13. So your right about that. Because I AM AGNOSTIC. I don't agree with these beliefes weather it be Christian, morman, j/w, or catholic.. I don't agree woth preeching. Or going around trying to bring people into your cult! That's all they ever do. I don't need to listen. I have listened to then already. An I already said. My dogs will not bite. (earlyer I simply stated if they did, it's the j/w fault for pushing my door open, or sticking there arm in when I close it. My dogs where training collars at all times so their good dogs. The collars have spikes that dig into their neck when it gets pulled on.) They look mean so all the j/w will leave without me getting so frustrated my head almost explodes. And you may call me whatever for not listening to them but I have beofre and sorry I'm not wasting my time standing there talking about something I completely don't agree with or believe in. Cool there all brave and go door to door. I really don't care how bad ass you think that makes them lol.

I am one of Jehovah's Witnesses, if you contact our kingdom Hall and ask to be put on our "Do not call" list that should clear the problem up. understand though sumtimes we don't check the list. an honest mistake. just remember we r ppl too and let us know when we come to the door that you are on the list. we will leave.

Yup!! That's what you oughta do.

holy shitttt i lyk yur pic:)

sugarbaby i find u incredalbly hawt

Thanks, Sugar. I actually agree with your views, and it was the JH who was to blame in your situation.

lol yes! someone actually agrees. well all my friends do. And my family that is not J/W. seriously though. does no one else understand when I tell you don't come back. and phone your church to request that you don't come back why stick your hand in my door and or foot. I'm never ever mean when they come with there cute little kids that they put infront of them so you can't slam your door and tell them go away. that's why they bring there little kids and make them knock on your door and stand there. so you can't do anything. it ridiculous. and yet they say they live by there religious views.. but they wear makeup, they swear, and the bible says basically kill people who are not believers, and gays. but whatever these are my opinions. I'm too outspoken.

I just wanted to let you know Sugarbabe, I created a FMyLife account just to call you a fucking retard. Show some human decency for once. Kkthnxs?

Oh fuck you. Jehovah's Witnesses are the awesome. We believe in God and Jesus and wtf? Mary is a hoe? fuck you

I'm not saying it's right for her to call Him a lie or Mary a hoe but I'm not saying the rest o the people should call her a bitch.. most the people on this site tell others to have some decancy blah blah blah and then at the end they something stupid like retard.. I hate it when people call others immature and they think that they themselves are mature because they call others retards.. those people need to grow up.

sugarbaby is a fxcking idiot

For the record, I'm a Witness, and while I don't necessarily agree with sugarbaby's way of handling the situation, I don't think calling her a retard and moron really help the situation. According to her, there's enough blame to go around. I don't deny that some Witnesses can be.... less than tactful when it comes to talking about the Bible and such (my mother is a good one that comes to mind - ha), but hey - everyone's got their own way. Some people are just outspoken like that. Just like some of us are very quiet and shy. Sugarbaby - I apologize if we offended you. None was meant. Just next time - please be a little more considerate. We're just like you, ya know? We're people - we have feelings. We try the best we can to look out for yours - doesn't always work, sorry for the times when it doesn't show - we just ask you do the same. No worries....

jehovah witnesses, such as myself, spend their time going to the doors of people no matter the weather because they simply want to help. what good would a teacher be if they took the day off every time it got cold outside or a little rainstorm happened? the goal of the jehovah witnesses is to teach and spread the truth and help those who are willing to accept the help. they're not pushy or even harassing to anyone. if you say no, they leave. I do not, and I will never ever understand why people think that article sharing your views with the world instead of sitting in a church and waiting for the people to come to you is a bad thing.

You obviously care, or you wouldn't be replying to his comment. But I don't care if you care that no one cares about him caring about being 2nd, so whatever.

*^^Realised that previous post means I care about 17 caring about no one caring that pollockcr is 2nd, and that I also care about this post saying that my previous post means I don't care about 17 caring that no one cares that pollockcr is 2nd, or else I wouldn't be posting this.*

I would just yell out, "Bitch, what the hell you doing on my porch. You need to at least have Girl Scout cookies or something."

86- They'd probably be like, "We don't believe in hell, or enjoying cookies. The world is going to end any day now, since Jesus came back to earth 90 years ago, so don't bother being happy. You're going to be murdered by god since you're not a witness!" *Creepy smile and stare*

Sad. Get some friends/

You should have started a theological debate with them à la fmylife.com and I'm sure they would have gladly left. Plus, you would feel all high and mighty knowing that you pissed them off real good.

You err in assuming that JW's have more capacity for debate than just sticking their fingers in their ears and shouting, "LALALALALAICAN'THEARYOULALALAGODISGREAT."

Looks like we are really lucky tonight. #81 has been kind enough to provide us with an example. Note the ad hominem logical fallacy being used, a familar sight in FML debates. Let's see if someone tries to make a rebuttal.

aww. go to chat roulette. make friends, meet penises. :D

"This guy looks normal" *pants drop* "Nevermind, just another guy jacking off." Next!

haha yea. been there seen that, not that I wanted to see but yea

go back to school and learn to spell... JoHoes should stop going door to door trying to sell a religion. fuckin cult or some shit? you guys should stay the fuck off our propertys or parents!! y'all are fucked! ahahah I've met nice ones. I don't preech to you about how I don't believe in god. so don't tell me how the he'll to live my life. suck it! lol

hell*** not he'll sorry iPhone auto correct.

Lol, I believe it actually is classified as a cult. An easy way to get rid of them is to say "Come in, I used to be a Jehovah's Witness... let me tell you why I left." They're not allowed to talk to apostates. xD

really lol? I slam there hands in the door and threaten to shoot them. haha if my dogs are in the house I make them "watchem" lol so they'll sit there and kinda snarle and growl haha. (I have 2 massive pitbulls lol nicest babies ever.. but they protect me so yeah ahaha) they will usually go without putting there limbs into my house when I say no thank you. hahah

i thought they called them dieheritics when they are released. :)

they don't 'sell' religion, they never ask for money, every once in a while they will tell you that if you want to then you can donate money, but only if someone genuinly shows interest. if you dont donate, you are never shunned or looked down on as lesser.

#24 = Total Win (:

LOL I agree with 33 xD Either that or offer em a Christmas present :)

Jo Hoes? What a disrespectful little brat. they bring their religion because it makes them happy and they want you happy too. Oh the horrors. Get over it. Hoes. Like the hoe who posts a photo of themselves in a swimsuit showing off their body on a website for a little extra attention?

I thought you said you're pitties won't attack damn you're a pathological lier then you'll pull a gun out on them lol damn someone should take you're dogs away from you I know that when I watch shit on the TV on how they fight them i cry cause I know that I can't do anything about it, I guess you don't really love you're dogs cause if you put them in a position where they have to attack"look when I close the door on this persons hand and after I've finished breaking his hand attack the shot out of him" if you're dogs bite they will be taken from you and be put down

I stuck a jesus fish with devil horns to my front door. never came back since!

Why the fick should my dogs be taken away? You retard. THEY ARE NOT ATTACK DOGS. Any fucking dog will protect there master. Your pretty dense because I don't and would never make my dogs ever fight, and I'm not a lier because I said the won't attack but if they did, your fucking stupid.. So why should they be taken away? Because they would protect me if something ever happened. Fuck off man, laws in BC about these dogs is different than in America. And sorry I wouldn't shoot them either hahaha actually we were shooting our airsoft guns at them we were hammered and went to the upstairs window of my friends place and creeped it out the window hahahah it was awesome. So shut up man. You don't know me or anything about me. Or my spoiled rotten dogs that get treated better than ever!!!

not a cult-get your facts straight. witnesses are out there out of the goodness of there hearts. you don't deserve their selfsacrifice to try to help you.

good cause I don't want it! lol

u are exactly right they are nice, they don't charge for anything like churches. they don't sell religion they just explain what they believe and let you chose for yourself. they are also very smart

lol you like calling people retard a lot lol you have to admitte you're crazy right, and if you're dogs are attack dogs then they are if thier not then there not hey and bright idea put up a FUCKING fence so when they knock they don't come to the door and not only JWs knock on the door so do christians and baptists maybe it's not the JWs maybe it's another religion

actually I have never in my life seen a Christian go door to door to preech. my real dads side of the family is all Christian. some work at the church. they don't do that.

make friends with penises? :D

yes. make friends with penises. penises are everyones friend. mmmhmm

I saw that episode too, FYLDeep. :D

for sure. south park FTW!!

Ahh, Chat roulette is a sausage fest filled with people trying to show off their two-inchers.

fukk yuh bitch wtff yuh got a problem johovah witnesses damnn WTF did I Eva do to yuh shiit if u didn't want dem dere den don't answer da door be lonely gosh!!

Those people are so stupid. they aren't even a religion, they're a conservative cult meant to erraticate gays from this earth...

Yeah, their goal is to eliminate gays and Liberals from the earth.

Well my aunt is a JW and even though they do look down upon gays, it is not the core of their teachings and they actually don't bring it up until others do

it only says its wrong to lie with another MAN. lesbianism is a ok especially if the girls are hot like on porn videos.

Hahah @38. I always tell that joke to my gay friends.... Same thing with masturbation. If you spill male seed, you go to hell, but female masturbation is no problem. So the bible was written by a secret lesbian cult?

I don't think u gays...I mean guys know what you're talking about

I thought you said you're pitties won't attack damn you're a patiligical(spell check) lier then you said you would take the gun out on them lol damn damn someone should take away you're dogs cause I love pitties damn when I watch shot on TV on how they fight them I cry but if you put them in a place where "if thiese fucking people don't leave and I brake thier hand already attack"then you must not love them because once they bit they are put down

They don't hate gays, they just disapprove of their "lifestyle"(Whatever the hell that means).

LOL at my mum.