By ilovekids? - 12/12/2015 02:05 - United States - Commack
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I give freebies away to kids all the time. It's the parents who are fucked in the head thinking that every guy who interacts with their kid is a pedo. Not only is it incredibly sexist, it's entirely inaccurate as 9/10 victims know the perpetrator beforehand.
I feel like the mother was more angry that she wasn't asked before giving candy to the child. Once it's in his hands she can't take it from him without causing more problems. She may not want him to have it for any number of reasons. Ultimately, he's her son and it's up to her what he eats. I say OP deserved this one for not asking if it was ok.
Parents are not fucked in the head for wanting to protect their children. And it's not limited to men interacting with their children. Parents teach their kids that stranger danger applies to everyone that they don't know- men, women and children and it's not just to protect them from pedophilia. They don't want a stranger coming up to their child and interacting with them because they don't know that person's motives and especially not when they are trying to parent- they don't want their children thinking "Oh whenever my mum/dad won't let me have my way, I'll just go to a stranger" and you can tell a child over and over again, don't talk to/go off with strangers and they might still do it. Yes, it's important to learn about kindness and that not every kind person wishes to harm you, but children lack the sense of judgement that adults have, which is why they are taught stranger danger in the first place. Also, as you just pointed out with many victims knowing perps, you can never be certain who will harm your children which is why parents have the attitude of 'it's best to assume the worst and protect them than be sorry.'
Mom was right. You positively reinforced poor behavior. Now the child will act up more and longer to get what she wants. YDI
You're right, but she still overreacting by accusing OP of "grooming" the child. If you weren't aware, grooming is what child molesters do to get a child to trust them. Sure, OP reinforced bad behavior and the mom had the right to be upset, but she didn't have the right to accuse OP of grooming her child.
If the mother said no to candy, then don't offer it. Instead you address the parent, ask if the child could have a free treat softly. I would have been pissed as well. It's like people giving my dog treats without asking, by holding it out and getting the dog excited. Or wanting to feed my nephew. There are dietary restrictions and enforcement of behavior parents/guardians try to do and you need to not feed kids just because they are "cute."