Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, she tells me that the flab on my stomach does not turn her on, and stops in the middle of it. Therefore, until my diet is over, guess who doesn't get any. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I've been dieting and working out trying to work towards some solid abs because I know my girlfriend digs that stuff. I've been miserable trying to achieve this goal, plus to make things even better while kissing today she grabbed my stomach and said "I just love your abs of... flab." FML
Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend, she was grabbing the fat on my stomach. I said to her, "Quit touching my fat!" She replied, "So… don't touch you at all?" FML
Today, my boyfriend of a year and a half informed me that he had "accepted" my stomach, even though it didn't conform to his "preference" for a flat stomach. He then added that his acceptance doesn't extend to my "chunky thighs". FML
Today, the whole time my husband and I had sex, my stomach flab violently slapped my thighs. The harder he pumped, the louder the slapping got. Time to lose some weight. FML
Today, my girlfriend wanted to try having sex despite her serious body image issues. Unfortunately, I couldn't get it up due to how utterly terrified she looked. Now no matter what I say, she thinks it's all because her body is hideous. FML
Today, my boyfriend finally told me after over two years together that the reason we only have sex once a month is because my stomach is, “off-putting”. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML
Today, I find out why my long term boyfriend hasn't been interested in sex for the last three months. It’s because I’m "fat." While I could probably lose a few, I'm not obese and I'm the one who's encouraging healthy eating and exercise in our house. FML
Today, I had to convince my girlfriend that, no matter how much she makes herself burp, she won't lose any weight. She still doesn't understand why. FML
Today, my girlfriend had a huge fight with me because while I'm trying to gain weight and she’s trying to lose some, I’ve still lost more weight than her. Not my fault my body’s natural preference is to drop pounds like they’re hot. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thank you, your FML was submitted, and will appear the moderation soon!
Top comments
abceasyas123abc 12
What ever happened to unconditional love??
honeypixi01 0
Tell her that her face doesn't turn you on and give her a facial to cover it up so you don't have to see it.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (187)
abbynoelle 1
Cheat on her superficial ass! Show her there are other women who would love to hook up with you!;)
dwreckedhit 3
Yeah, fat ones.
micah38 5
Motivation
ralmilk 16
that's ridiculous. she shouldn't be telling you to change yourself
doumtabarnack 12
Dude really **** those diets go to the gym and get ripped
jgraham0218 5
She doesn't sound like someone you should be with. If you love someone you don't give them Ultimatums like that.
isabellasimone 18
Motivation!
gablucas 12
Sounds like a keeper ...
elihanson 6
Guess who doesn't get any in the first place…
TWolfPackMom 7
dude you need a new girlfriend.....
writerchic85 25
Your girlfriend sounds like princess of the *****