By Anonymous - 13/10/2010 14:03 - United States

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, her pet bird whistled a tune she'd been trying to teach it. She stopped and congratulated it, and I took the chance to move it to the other room to prevent further distraction. She got mad and wouldn't let me back in bed because I just "untrained it." FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 467
You deserved it 7 695

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You obviously don't know how hard it is to train a bird. Neither do I, but still I guess it's more difficult than having sex.

It's her bird, not yours. So why'd you even move it anyway? Totally unnecessary. Just pick up where you left off and keep going. Gives your little man a breather anyway so he can calm down and go the distance. Also while training animals or children, you don't separate them from you when they're doing something you want to encourage - that's what you do when you want them to knock it off. Whining, screaming, barking... you ignore and leave the room. That's essentially what you did.


His gf wouldn't let him back into bed, so I'd vote "no" on that...

I'm just going to assume your GF is 15 yrs old and a Hello Kitty fan..

18- I'm just going to assume, given what I can see of your profile on my iPod, that you are utterly full of shit. Making fun of Hello Kitty is both narrow-minded and irrelevant, and there wouldn't really be anything wrong with 1 dating a 15-year-old considering the birthdate on his profile. But, while we're both being bitchy and irrelevant, I'm going to add to my prior attack on you. You are not only full of shit, you are trying to pass off a fake image as a picture of you. Regardless of whether or not that is actually you in the picture, it is so photoshopped, poorly at that, that it more of a cartoon than a picture. Also, how can you make fun of Hello Kitty given what you're wearing? I <3 collagen? How classy.

JXJ_fml 0

It's creepy to have sex in front of pets. I had a girlfriend whose dog would sneak into the bedroom and watch us. Just creepy

O_O I thought it said I <3 college.... -_-

I thought it sai 'I <3 COLLAGE' and that the joke was that she couldn't spell college... guess I'm wrong.

brightnite 0

but the profile pic is obvious fake

You obviously don't know how hard it is to train a bird. Neither do I, but still I guess it's more difficult than having sex.

The point is not how hard it is to train a bird, but whether you value a trained bird higher than an intimate relationship with another human being.

Intimate relationship could wait for, let's say, two minutes? If she don't reward the bird immediatly when it does something good, than she should simply stop training, because it just won't have any effect. Training is hard, and I find it selfish of the boyfriend that he 'sabotates' the birds training process where his girlfriend spend so much time and effort on, just to continue sex. Am I the only one that completely understands the girlfriend? It's not that she wanted to cockblock him, he cockblocked himself. If I had a bird, and I would try to train it (in real life I'm too lasy for that), and he finally did his trick right, I would be so, so, soooo happy and proud. And the sex would be so much better after, because I just got an extra happiness-boost. But if my boyfriend responds by putting the bird away, by showing 'At this moment I really don't care that you're happy because of anything different than me, just suck my dick', I wouldn't be happy. On the contrary. It's selfish, and OP's girlfriend has than the right to be angry.

you're right, if it's just another sex bout among many, then a few minutes of being excited that the bird who, for the first time began whistling, they can stop. Hell, I probably would stop to take notice, depending how caught in the moment my girl and i were.

Lalala1996 0

You all seriously have no life.

According to your reasoning, the owner would have to be at the presence of the bird 24/7 to congratulate the bird at any time the bird performed the said trick. The girl had her chance to reward the bird. Obviously the guy was startled by this but (according to the FML), I think he made a smart manuever to move to another room to avoid being distracted again. Now the girl, on the other hand, took that action the wrong way and overreacted. What did she think she has to be at the bird's presence at all times?

tell her not to train pets while she is preoccupied and it wot happen again

jkgfdxb 0

haha damn birds. now you have to make love to your hand.

Hmm, I'm on the girls side here, it'll take ages to teach the bird that it was being good, again. Though, it was childish of her not to let you in, so you deserve it for not helping matters with the bird (though I don't know if you knew you'd be untraining it by doing that, or just didn't care), but then F your life for having a childish girlfriend who won't let you finish! :) Tweet tweet.

It's moronic to attempt to train a bird while you are having sex. The bird shouldn't be in her bedroom in the first place.

I have birds in my bedroom. If you live with other people or your parents, but the birds are yours personally, they're going to be in your room, aren't they? Gosh. With training, if the bird does exactly what you want it to do, you praise it immediately so it knows that it did well and will carry on doing it. If it's doing something you don't want it to do, like screeching for attention, you walk out of the room and leave it so it knows that screeching isn't going to get it any attention. Basically, by putting the bird outside the room, the guy taught it that it was being naughty by singing the tune, which will probably make the bird less willing to sing that tune again; 'untraining' it. Though, it was stupid of the girl not to finish the 'hunka munka'...

i guess you AND the bird will be whistling a different tune now