Today, while driving home I saw a few deer running beside me. I stopped to let them go in front. Instead, one face-plants, ramming into the side of my new car. FML

Today, after recently moving to America as I've always dreamt of, I saw my first, majestic deer. My boyfriend slammed it with the rental car. FML

Today, I bought a new car. Twenty-five minutes into driving it home, I hit a deer. FML

Oh dear

Today, I hit a dead deer that had been left in the middle of the road. My car started to make a funny noise and smell, so I pulled over to check it, thinking I blew the tire on some antlers. The deer had got stuck in my front wheel, and I'd dragged it more than a mile. And it wasn't actually dead. FML

Today, I hit a deer. The worst part? Papa deer saw me hit mama deer, and proceded to ram into my car. FML

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML

Psycho

Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML

Enabling

Today, I let my boyfriend drive my car, knowing that he doesn't have a license. While he was out, he ran a stop sign, collided with another vehicle, and then left the scene of the accident. Then he lied to me about how the accident happened so I "wouldn't be so upset." FML

Bastard Bambi busts bumper

Today, I volunteered to go get ice cream if I could use my mother's car. She told me to be VERY careful. Not ten minutes later, I hit a deer, which got up and walked off as though nothing had happened. FML