Bushfan101
France 🌶️ Spicy
Today, the guy I hooked up with last weekend texted me that I needed to "landscape my front lawn." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
jkon
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I texted my girlfriend and told her I was mowing my lawn. She responded, "It's about time, it keeps getting caught in my teeth!" I was referring to the lawn outside of my house. FML
praise the prenup
Delaware, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that the landscaper my wife hired on my behalf wasn't kidding when he said he was going to trim my wife's bush. FML
needfulthing
United States
Today, I sent a text to a guy I'd met over the weekend. He'd traveled 40 miles to my town for the date, so I picked up the tab for dinner. My text simply said, "Had a nice time. Looking forward to getting together again." His reply was, "When did you get so needy?" FML
Deconstructed
United States
Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping by our backyard pool. Ready for a shower, I stripped naked, opened the back door to let the dog out, and stepped out to ask him how it was going. Turns out he'd finally hired a landscaping crew. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML
:/
Moreno Valley, United States
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
Anonymous
Little Rock, United States
One man and his lawn
Today, my husband, who rarely helps with big projects around the house, offered to help me with our mess of a backyard. An hour and a half into the project, and an hour and a half after he disappeared from the backyard, I found him mowing and edging the front. Our front yard was immaculate and didn't need mowed. FML
Anonymous
Riverside, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I got a text from a guy I hooked up with. I'm not really interested in him, so I rushed out of his house last night. He was letting me know I left my wallet at his house, and if I want it, I'll have to let him take me to dinner. FML
anon
Canada
Today, my neighbor finally cut the grass on his front lawn. At 2 in the morning. FML
Top comments
rldostie 19
While I have nothing against shaving, and do so myself, I DO have a problem with men who expect or demand it. Really? Do you guys know how much of a hassle it is or what happens if you don't maintain it? A girl should only do it if she wants to. I wonder how guys would feel if all women expected and demanded they shave down south as well.
dynky 3
what a complete asshole! don't get into shaving, you'll regret it once the skin gets all dry and irritated, and oh god the ITCHING when it starts growing back. Get a guy who has more respect for you.
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Comments (78)
Blacktivate 0
ha that's a little too subtle for most unfortunately
Squander 3
I love my furball!
windfuelsfire 10
I like bushes so long as it doesent make finding the ******** difficult
FYLDeep 26
I've seen you double dip when there's something good.
puntificator 0
And as for your screen name, we award you a 9/10 for originality, and a 5/10 for execution. The judges would have preferred "AVoteForBush" or "Bushwhacked", among other clever bush references. Please do try again next year!
boredomowns 0
people need to experiment more.. I shaved for my boyfriend for about 2 months then one time he came over unexpected and I didn't have time to shave..he ended up liking it way more. he said it was sexier and even felt better. it all just depends on the person I guess but I don't think there's many people that like it crazy so at least trim
fairies633 8
does he mean ur real lawn or ur lawn down there
Jason_Q 4
Make your "front lawn" emo so it'll cut itself and save you the hassle.
ladykat 0
I think its more of an fml bc he's contacting her a week later.
r21s03 0
hahaha