FML for mobile
Free

Open in app
FMyLife
emi

Today, not only does my cat rabidly attack my face if I don't let him sleep on my pillow, but he snores too. FML

79

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

Isoldael 27

So don't let it into the bedroom when you go to sleep?

OhKariBear 1

You need the Cats From Hell guy.

Add a comment · Reply to

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Sign in Create my account

Comments (79)

Xythenol 6

Just wait for the mods...

dacuar 0

This is a story that you should of shared with your doctor, not the world. Quit being a cry baby. We don't want to read about your problems.. GET A LIFE

Zomg_Okay 27

15 - Fairly sure OP would have to be alive to post an FML, so they've got that covered. Now, you seem to take issue with people posting FMLs on the FML website. What, pray tell, did you think the website is for?

dude1122332 9

15.. YOU MAD BRO? Just because your fml's don't make, doesn't mean you have to comment here acting like the worlds ending. Just keep it to yourself. Kay?(;

Mr_Krabs 5

Not sure if trolling (Fry) Or just really stupid

Awsumuzzie 12

How ironic! I was just heading to my gastroenterologist to tell him how I want a cat! Creepy! (sarcasm). Besides, I, for one, come to this website to read people's problems, but I think it maybe is just me...

isaiahyoung99 2

Umm that's why we are all actually here.. To read people's problems!!

bmkc4 1

15, stop reading FML if you don't want to hear people vent

comeatmebroo6254 1

Well that's kind of what this app is about. So, get off FML if you don't like reading about other people's difficulties.

seasonedtoast 19

At least you can lock your cat in the bathroom. Can't really do that with my boyfriend...

kelissa_fml 16

You can't? Oops.

seasonedtoast 19

It's frowned upon I believe

VeganVampyre 27

Damn! Um, I'll be right back...

hockeyoceancity 13

Put a muzzle on your boyfriend and hog tie him and put him on a different bed and put the cat in there with a nice comfy pillow, problem solved and you get a laugh from it.

perdix 31

Send the cat to an animal psychiatrist to deal with his anger issues and get anti-psychotic meds. Get the cat a feline CPAP machine to fix the snoring. A normal person would put such a cat down and get a new one. But, why be normal?

MagicStallion 9

Are you serious? All it needs is a CAT scan. None of this medication. You can trust me, I'm a dumbass.

eggmarie 25

I must not know very many normal people. I don't know ANYONE who would put down a cat just for liking attention and snoring. Do you also think that people should give their babies up for adoption and make a new one just because they poop and cry?

nevershoutkendal_fml 11

I'm sure Mr. Perdix was just kidding. Take a joke.

ManInTheMachine 20

It always baffles me when people can't tell perdix is kidding, considering he's joking 97% of the time.

Shadomasta 5

He should know better. There is clearly a zero tolerance policy on negative cat jokes on FML.

eggmarie 25

I'm aware it was a joke. It was horribly unfunny.

perdix 31

#62, did you and all of the down-thumbers miss the "rabidly attacking my face" part? Unless the OP was exaggerating for effect, it's insane to live with such an animal as a pet. "Liking attention" doesn't really describe the cat's violent behavior. It probably couldn't even get work as a bouncer at a strip club.

eggmarie 25

I took it as over exaggerating.

hockeyoceancity 13

83- Your bio is funny because you're being serious. Also Perdix is right, if the cat is ripping your face apart why keep it? It's one thing for a cat to scartch you for harrassing the animal but the cat is invading OP space which if this was the wild OP should kick the cat's ass out of OP's house!

Isoldael 27

Or OP could just train the cat as they probably should have a long time ago. Unwanted behaviour displayed by animals is caused by the owner in the vast majority of cases.

lizze_bee 0

Shove that douche out of your room. Problem solved.

Inediblepeaches 15

Put him in a cage. Don't be bullied by your cat.

calmyourself 7

U should try getting another pillow and sleeping on that while he sleeps on the pillow he's used to sleeping on. This will also give u the chance to move the pillow somewhere else so you don't have to deal with him snoring

gracehi 33

It might not be the pillow so much as OP's head. Cats like sleeping against people's heads for some reason. Growing up I had a cat who would always sleep with me because I was the only one who would let her do it.

nerdchic 5

Now why would he do something that simple? Lol

safaeita 32

well, having a cat myself i can totally relate to this

kaymi 17

Oh I feel your pain. My new kitten is a little terror. He constantly tries to sit on my head and I fight him until I fall asleep. When I wake up guess where he is at? On my head, clawing my hair. He usually wakes me up by sneezing on me. That darn cat!

JustKittyKat 24

When I first got my kitten a year ago, she sneezed in my eye. And just recently, she woke me by grabbing my closed eye with her claws. She's honestly very sweet. It's just, when she gets hungry, she becomes the reincarnation of satan himself.

Enslaved 38

You're pussywhipped if you let her get her way with that.