Today, not only does my cat rabidly attack my face if I don't let him sleep on my pillow, but he snores too. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Today, my cat likes to share my pillow at night. I guess she was extra comfortable last night, because she didn't bother getting off it to hack up a hairball. I woke up because I rolled my face onto it. FML
Today, I noticed my kitten was growling and twitching in his sleep. I tried to wake him up by gently prodding him. He responded by waking up and attacking my face. FML
Human! I request petting!
Today, my cat has made a habit of waking me and my husband up every morning by meowing in front of our bedroom door until we get up. This morning, I finally got her to stop, so I went back to bed hoping to sleep in for a while… Only to be kept awake by my husband’s snoring. FML
Today, I was woken up to the sound of my cat peeing on the pillow next to mine. When I yelled at him, he jumped over my face and off the bed. He was still peeing the entire time. FML
Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML
Alexa, play "The Lovecats" by The Cure
Today, my cat woke me up announcing he was hungry by standing on my bedside table. This placed him both next to and above my head. Did he do this by meowing? Nope. Did he do it by tapping me with his little paw? Not that either. He sneezed all over my face. FML
Today, between my cats scratching every surface they can find, my boyfriend's snoring, and the dog barking at every slight noise outside, I'm unlikely to ever get more than 3 hours of sleep at a time. FML
Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML
Dr Dolittle
Today, my dog won't stop barking at his own shadow, my cat won't stop purring while kneading on me, and my new kitten won't stop squeaking. It's all very cute, but I can't sleep at all. FML
Appetizer
Today, my cat woke me up by drooling all over my face. Whatever happened to “Cats rule, dogs drool”? FML
Top comments
Isoldael 27
So don't let it into the bedroom when you go to sleep?
OhKariBear 1
You need the Cats From Hell guy.
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Comments (79)
Quikraptor 8
This is why people need to learn to train their cats like they would a dog. Cats are, by nature, selfish. You can train your cat for obedience, too, without harming them.
Squeaky_Tomato 14
That's very true. My cat comes when I call his name, greets me at the door when I get home from work, loves having his belly rubbed, and plays fetch.
SimplyEerb 3
Probably time to invest in a second pillow.
alphaskater09 9
116-who asked you???
HellCat1970 0
It's really clear who's in charge here...
SoultheWolf 19
Just throw him out of the room if you don't like it. Stop being a wimp and take charge. YOU are the owner not the cat.
Alliente 9
Look on the bright side, OP. At least you're not allergic.
Isoldael 27
86 - when a cat attacks, it usually uses both teeth and claws, so it's not that far-fetched.
SwaggCapone 11
buy a dog?
Taurus_ChicKa 37
This gives a whole new meaning to "Pillow Pet."
jewwybeanzzz 10
Simple. Get a dog