By rockstarohyeah - United States
Today, I was given the best news of my life. I am cancer free and am not, at the ripe age of 23 going to bite the dust. My husband left his journal on the nightstand in our bedroom. He wrote, "I feel like a bad person, but if she dies, I don't have to get divorced." FML
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  americayay  |  0

And so you're still cancer free and have time to find someone who wants to be with you. It's all about perspective. Would you feel better if you WEREN'T cancer free and he wanted to leave you?

  Xero3g  |  5

He isn't that bad. It's a dying relationship. When you had cancer, he would have stuck through for you, at the cost of his own life. Now you're both free to move on and you don't have cancer any more. You are one of the luckiest people in the world. This is not an FML.

  sallay  |  0

aww hun don't you worry about it, I know many people who have/had kids with cancer, and almost all of them are divorced. Cancer is very trying on a relationship, many people can't deal with the stress and end up leaving. It's hard, i know, but you are young and healthy, time to move on to bigger and better things!

  americayay  |  0

Yeah, since 23 and married isn't right for you, of course that standard fits the rest of the world too. I'm glad I have you to set the mold and rules for how I live MY life. Thank you.

  FrostyNorth  |  0

You fail reading comprehension #113. The objection wasn't to marriage at 23, but loveless marriage at 23.

Regardless, most people aren't mature enough to be married at 23 so get over it.

  sika_fml  |  0

My husband and I met when I was 17...we got engaged when I was 20 and married when I was 23. That was a year ago. Are you really going to try to tell me that after 6 years it was still too early for us to get married?! The average age for women is still 22 and for men 25. That's pretty high by human standards. 23 is not too young to be married.

But...I know some people who might have waited if their spouse didn't have terminal cancer. If you love someone...and think you're going to die quite makes sense to get married even if maybe you're too young or not sure or just not ready.

I don't want to make assumptions, but I think the OP got married to him because they both thought she was going to die. He stuck by her, but knew that it was not going to work out if she went into remission. In a private moment he shared a feeling that many people might feel in that situation...if she were to die it would spare them the pain of divorce. It's not like he wished that she would die. If you have never been in this situation then don't try to tell me you wouldn't feel the same way as him. Most people never want to have to hurt the feelings of someone they care about (I'm sure he cares about her). Yes it's selfish...that's why we have journals...for our weak moments.


agreed. both sets of my grandparents got married at 18, and have been married for 50+ years, same with my parents who just celebrated 29 years. putting out a generalization that anyone married at 23 is stupid is pretty ignorant if you ask me.

By  Mata_Hari  |  0

One is kind of YDI for reading his diary. Seriously, one half I feel bad, but the other half, not so much.

Just because in a bad moment he wrote down his personal feelings in a diary - doesn't mean he's ALWAYS like that, that was his personal feelings at that particular minute he was writing. Just sayin...

But yeah, FYL.

  Qauzzix  |  0


Are you saying that only men think privacy is important ? So all woman would agree that you should invade the privacy of your spouse ?

Sorry but that really speaks ill of woman.

  noclevername  |  0

Snooping is bad. Whether you get to feel angry depends on what you find out by snooping is worse than snooping itself. And this is much, much worse. If your husband is going to write things like that, he should make damn sure he leaves it somewhere you never see it. Sure, you shouldn't read it, but I doubt any of the people up on their high horses have never been tempted to sneak a peek when they found something like that.

And congratulations on the good news, I hope you have many happy, healthy years ahead of you. x

  andrew6p  |  19

Even if she did snoop around a bit, her husband was thinking about a divorce. But if she dies, he doesnt have to. Thats really effed up. Im happy for op that she's no cancer free but im sad for her because she married a douchebag.

By  moriah  |  0

When shitty things happen to other people, in other fmls, we don't say "FYL if you're a good person. YDI if you're not!" being a good person is not a pre-requisite for having a fucked life.