Health: Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring...

By smith - 28/01/2012 03:13 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring all's fair in love and war, I bought some laxatives to prank her with. They took a lot longer to work than I thought, and I ended up lying in bed, listening to my wife shitting her guts out in the bathroom for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 402

You deserved it 57 866

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Same thing different taste

When pranking goes too far

By Anonymous - 27/03/2021 20:01

Today, my husband has both arms broken, and I have to help him in the bathroom. Not the problem. My girlfriends and I have been pranking each other lately and it's been fun, but they decided to slip my husband slip him some laxatives so that I would have to clean him him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 045

You deserved it 172

By FUCK GOD - 03/02/2013 23:04 - Argentina - Salta

Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 110

You deserved it 4 851

By Anonymous - 15/09/2014 18:48 - United Kingdom - Liverpool

Today, I took a shit of biblical proportions. I flushed and opened a window, but my pregnant wife went in straight after me. Her morning sickness kicked in and she quickly ran out, vomit dripping from her mouth. She's pissed and thinks I planned the whole thing as a prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 175

You deserved it 4 384

By Anonymous - 21/01/2015 04:29 - United States - Bentonville

Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 987

You deserved it 2 887

Revenge is sweet

By Anonymous - 12/10/2013 22:03 - Iceland - Akranes

Today, my mom was acting really pissy, and I couldn't help but mutter that she must be on her period. Five hours later, I'm glued to the toilet with my phone, because she went all out for revenge and spiked my dinner with some hellishly potent kind of laxative. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 257

You deserved it 27 795

By someone - 01/04/2014 19:21 - United States - Point Pleasant

Today, I resorted to the oldest prank in the book: laxatives in the food. Except it wasn't for a prank, but just a desperate attempt to get my clingy boyfriend to leave me the hell alone. I think I'm going to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 561

You deserved it 12 667

Blockages

By jakestorm - 04/09/2019 20:00

Today, my girlfriend texted me to pick her up some medicine because she’s "all plugged up." When I arrived with laxatives, she yelled at me. She meant her sinuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 692

You deserved it 373

Great boyfriend, part 2

By thanks a lot - 04/05/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend made me a latte. It tasted off, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I drank it. Turns out he put laxatives in it as a prank. The idiot couldn’t just use one or two. He used so many that I had to go to the ER for severe dehydration after puking and shitting for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 896

You deserved it 198

Stuck

By Anonymous - 09/08/2022 10:00 - Australia

Today, I had to take a laxative for the first time. Instead of working gently overnight like it promised, I woke up at 3 a.m. to an unrelenting river of shit that made my legs numb on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 022

You deserved it 133

By ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 763

You deserved it 40 902

Pr0metheus 7

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:14

Hm well I think your wife should be the one writing this FML, you know since she's practically ******** fire in there...

kayleebearr 6

Saturday 28 January 2012 5:16

YDI for giving your wife laxatives just because she made fun of your tiny wiener .

Comments

eveadamsnyc 2

Saturday 28 January 2012 6:48

I don't get how this is comparable retaliation!!!

missyfiona89 28

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:03

You're an asshole, I hope my future husband can take a joke and not act up like a pussy.

GLaDOSv1_09 19

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:07

What a rational response. Maybe you can get back at her for being so loud by setting her hair on fire.

chrispasta 3

Saturday 28 January 2012 13:30

Hahaha that's horrible and ridiculous! But also just as logical as what he already did to her -_- I don't think I could trust him after that. He physically hurt her because of his ego. As silly as the situation may seem, that's pretty much abuse.

sikmunkee 9

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:18

victim of your own creation OP

ipoopinshoes 2

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:19

If you're that sensitive about the joke she made then it must be true.

jojimugo 20

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:20

Dude i say she got what she deserved ........ Don't start nothing there will be nothing

THE_A_TEEN 27

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:29

Soo what you're saying,is that she deserves her ass of a husband to give her laxatives, the same medicine that can hospitalize a person, and making her shit for over an hour, just because of a joke? Go join the Douche club with him.

mintypoison 22

Saturday 28 January 2012 21:10

No. Nononononono. There is a special level of hell for people like you. This guy went way too far because of a joke. You know what my boyfriend does when I make fun of him? He gives it right back. He doesn't drug me, and I deserve the jokes back sometimes. You are just as big of an ass as OP...

darkkisses 6

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:26

Well OP because of the fact that she was just playing around and teasing is, where as you take it overboard and make her physically ill. I would have to say ydi. Maybe you shouldn't overdue things the next time....

conqueror57 11

Saturday 28 January 2012 7:30

All you people continuing to imply his dick is small? You better watch what you eat and drink; this guy is just crazy enough to find you and do the same to you as he did to his wife! And he "loves" her!!