Today, my wife complained that the coffee grounds I swept into the sink grossed her out. Yesterday, I removed several panty-liners from her soiled underwear before doing the laundry. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my wife complained that the shower was draining slowly, so I took the drain cover off and snaked the drain. I pulled out a giant blob of reeking, stinking, rotten filth. My wife saw it and screamed. Now she insists she can still smell it on my hands and won't let me near her. FML
Today, my wife bitched at me for not washing my hands before handling the dishes. The dirty dishes. That were sitting in a sink of hot soapy water. According to her, the dirt from my hands was gonna make the dirty dishes even dirtier. Huh? FML
Today, I was doing the laundry and changing the bed sheets. I found most of my underwear under my step daughters bed, when I asked her, she said that she liked the way they smelled. FML
Today, my disgusting coworker made a comment about "women versus accountability" and I couldn't even yell at him for being a sexist scumbucket, because my wife threw coffee at me yesterday for pointing out that she'd left the chips open and they went stale. FML
Today, my wife spent a ton of money she took from me for a very expensive lingerie because, "it makes her feel more feminine and beautiful." Again. All this stuff just gathers dust in her drawers, and she keeps wearing the same ugly raggedy underwear for 3-4 days in a row, which is actually disgusting. FML
Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend once again that the dry skin she picks off her feet belong in the trash, not on our coffee table. FML
Today, I ran out of clean underwear and uncovered the pile of lingerie in the back of the drawer, none of which had been worn in over a year. Thanks, laundry day, for reminding me of how single I am. FML
Today, I went to retrieve my sneakers that my wife made me leave outside the door of our hotel room. Somebody had shat in one of them. FML
Today, my sister-in-law pooped with the bathroom door open until my husband had to tell her to close it, then she came out with unwashed hands and started rooting through the cookies. This isn't even the most unhygienic thing she's done today. FML
Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML
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Top comments
tishtashbat 16
I cannot believe some people make their bodily functions so gross for other people to deal with. why on earth anyone would leave that in their underwear for someone else to deal with is beyond me. it takes seconds to wrap it in tissue and put it in the bin!
Puffpie 24
Ew that's just nasty
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Comments (86)
150493x 29
Oh my that is absolutely disgusting. No person should have to do that it doesn't take that long to dispose of them properly. You need to talk about that.
fmlsams 27
As a female myself, that's disgusting and needs to stop, period.
fmlsams 27
It sounds like you and your wife need to have a discussion about how to clean up after yourselves so that you're both happy.
hammonds92 21
Could've been worse could've realized she was wearing them by taking her undies off...with your teeth fyl
rockbandaddict85 22
or if neither one of them took the liners off the panties before putting them through the wash.....yah....bad visual...had a sister that did that and I was the unfortuate one to end up cleaning the mess....beyond disgusting
kirasant 19
Damn, there's an FML, right there.
ballbags 14
1-that is true love 2-did you sniff them?
fmlsams 27
What? WHAT? That's just nasty.
Deku_Cutie 12
I didn't think women actually did that!
crackyeggy 9
You people are awfully rude. I wouldn't want to be your spouses. Have you ever considered she forgot? I have pretty extreme memory issues and I forget to remove pads all of the time. I remove them as soon as someone reminds me, maybe talk to her about it instead of being childish about it. She's your wife for god's sake.
dicamillo27 11
how about when you're taking off your underwear and you look down and see it, take it off and throw it away. that's nasty.
Jamesfmled 14
Yuck.
PurpleVixen 4
She REALLY should be doing that herself!
Flashman9000 9
Next time just throw them into the bin.
DestinyNiya 33
If you haven't talked to her already, I hope she reads this FML and apologizes!