Today, my wife complained that the coffee grounds I swept into the sink grossed her out. Yesterday, I removed several panty-liners from her soiled underwear before doing the laundry. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Snaked
Today, my wife complained that the shower was draining slowly, so I took the drain cover off and snaked the drain. I pulled out a giant blob of reeking, stinking, rotten filth. My wife saw it and screamed. Now she insists she can still smell it on my hands and won't let me near her. FML
Keep it clean
Today, my wife bitched at me for not washing my hands before handling the dishes. The dirty dishes. That were sitting in a sink of hot soapy water. According to her, the dirt from my hands was gonna make the dirty dishes even dirtier. Huh? FML
Smell good
Today, I was doing the laundry and changing the bed sheets. I found most of my underwear under my step daughters bed, when I asked her, she said that she liked the way they smelled. FML
Stay out of it
Today, my disgusting coworker made a comment about "women versus accountability" and I couldn't even yell at him for being a sexist scumbucket, because my wife threw coffee at me yesterday for pointing out that she'd left the chips open and they went stale. FML
Treat yourself
Today, my wife spent a ton of money she took from me for a very expensive lingerie because, "it makes her feel more feminine and beautiful." Again. All this stuff just gathers dust in her drawers, and she keeps wearing the same ugly raggedy underwear for 3-4 days in a row, which is actually disgusting. FML
Etiquette
Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend once again that the dry skin she picks off her feet belong in the trash, not on our coffee table. FML
Today, I ran out of clean underwear and uncovered the pile of lingerie in the back of the drawer, none of which had been worn in over a year. Thanks, laundry day, for reminding me of how single I am. FML
Morning surprise
Today, I went to retrieve my sneakers that my wife made me leave outside the door of our hotel room. Somebody had shat in one of them. FML
Today, my sister-in-law pooped with the bathroom door open until my husband had to tell her to close it, then she came out with unwashed hands and started rooting through the cookies. This isn't even the most unhygienic thing she's done today. FML
Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML
Top comments
tishtashbat 16
I cannot believe some people make their bodily functions so gross for other people to deal with. why on earth anyone would leave that in their underwear for someone else to deal with is beyond me. it takes seconds to wrap it in tissue and put it in the bin!
Puffpie 24
Ew that's just nasty
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Comments (86)
Metthew 15
That's really foul of her. Do you have a trashcan in the bathroom? Shove it in her face if you do, or buy a really big one and tell her to ******* dispose of those liners. As a woman I would never throw my panties in the laundry basket WITHOUT removing that, and her behaviour is just appalling. At least you're being the good guy by doing her laundry from time to time.
sonnyrosa 32
Oh, ick. Ick, ick, ick. That's as bad as skid mark undies.
cm1995_fml 10
I'm sorry but she's the woman in the house; why isn't SHE doing all the laundry or at least her own?? SMH
angelofsaturn 23
Cause men are incapable of doing laundry? Funny cause my fiancé manages to do just fine with his laundry and i manage the rest(his clothes get so greasy they can't go in with the other stuff).
ndnpride88 25
In clevelands voice ""THATS JUST NASTY"
ForeverJasmine 26
I would never expect someone to have to deal with my pantie liners because that's just gross
purplegold 19
Maybe she doesn't know that she leaves them in there.
Gillett 23
No offense home, but that's just nasty!
ally8 21
That's f-ing disgusting that she would leave soiled liners on her undies then put them in the dirty washing hamper! What a gross human being!
tickle_my_elbows 2
********** into her face flannel. That ought to even out the score.
hiholls 13
Sir, this is not okay. You really must speak up for yourself. Or suffer the consequences.