Today, my religious friend and I ended up having wild sex in the back of his mom's minivan. We got interrupted by a priest knocking at our window. Well played God, well played. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I pulled over to have sex in his mother's car. It was going great until I leaned back onto the horn, waking up our whole neighborhood. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. His mom didn’t know much about it, and she walked in on us. After about 5 minutes she came back up, threw a box of condoms at us, says, "Continue" and walked out. We were still fucking while she was in the room. FML
Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave, I decided to give him one last thrill. I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out. When I asked why, he pointed behind me. My mom had watched the whole thing. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML
Today, I told my ultra-Catholic mother that I was hanging out with a girl. While walking out of the flat, I didn't realize that I'd dropped one of my condoms out of my pocket. My mother saw it and ripped it apart, then yelled at me that, "Sex is for having children! You're giving yourselves to Satan!" I'm 20. FML
Today, my boyfriend snuck out of my room so he could have sex with my mom in the next room. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to spice things up and do 69. My mom walked in on us right as we came. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML
Today, I went to my Christian accountability partner from church to talk about continuing to maintain Christian values. We had sex. Oh, the irony. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Miss_Chevious 37
did you cry "oh God" as you climaxed?
zykrithium 22
Never got the chance to take the climax to heaven.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (115)
Xobubblyxo 23
FYL and the priest's life
confused_wandere 26
Why F the priest's life? He shouldn't have been looking! Hasn't he heard the old phrase: "If the minivan's rocking, don't come knocking"?
buckstop1 37
I'm assuming that he could see through the window if he was close enough to knock. He shouldn't have interrupted, and the only thing he accomplished was making it akward for you two in relation to the priest. But, on the other hand, YDI for having sex in a public place, and in a van that you didn't even own. That being said, it's everyone's fault. I hope you've learned your lesson.
chaseafterwind82 29
The priest was checking to make sure you weren't using a condom. That's a sin!
AngusEcrivain 18
Pretty sure that depends upon the religion in question..
AlaskanChild 10
Priest = Catholic
SquirrellyGirl 20
Most Catholics don't believe birth control is wrong anymore. That's kind of an old belief.
PhinIt2WinIt 24
not all priests have to be Catholic. But wth would a priest be near the van anyways? its worse if the priest knew them or it was outside a church.
Mobetta_2300 22
so,what had happened was...
Miss_Mandi 29
I understand sex in cars is fun, as I know what that's like, but if a priest was able to find you then that's way too public. You deserve that.
jude_iscariot 7
Been there, done that. Except it was a cop. But I had an ex whose dorm room at a Catholic college was over a priest's room. It felt so wrong on Easter Sunday, but so right, you know?
PhinIt2WinIt 24
no. I don't know. and I hope not to.
Ruskiy_Cherep 18
Hmmm Is his minivan red by any chance?
tiredofwaiting 25
Holy shit that is embarrassing. He was probably making sure you had condoms on you.
botanistjessica 24
Condoms? Do you typically use more than one?
Shadow73 13
You don't expect them to reuse them each go, do you?
EarlFug 19
Mothers are also omniscient.
xSen_fml 8
When the van is a-rockin, don't come a-knockin.