Anonymous
United States
Today, my mom decided to wake me up by pouring ice cold water on my face. Again. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
missmirror
United Kingdom
Today, my parents woke me up by pouring a glass of freezing cold water over my head. Their reason? They were "bored". FML
shinra
Freaky...
Today, it's the third time in a row that I've woken myself up in the middle of the night by pouring freezing cold water on myself. I didn’t even have water on my nightstand last night. I woke up in the kitchen. FML
Good Parenting?
Columbia, United States
Today, my mother woke me up by putting a beer on my face. After 15 minutes of her telling me to "just take a sip" and me rejecting it, I finally did just to shut her up. She then yelled at me for giving in to "peer pressure". FML
sheridan.ashley
Australia
Today, my sister decided to wake me up by pumping handwash into my open mouth. FML
joey
Zapped
Today, my mom decided to try her new taser on me while I was asleep on the couch. FML
Niles
North Vancouver, Canada
Today, I was taking a shower, when my dad decided to turn off the water to the house, run upstairs, and throw a bucket of freezing cold sludge into the shower with me. He wouldn't turn the water back on for 2 hours. FML
MereLewis95
United Kingdom
Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML
inalotofpain
United States
Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML
Anonymous
Isn't it ironic, don't you think?
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while he was sleeping, to see if he'd pee himself. He woke up and punched me in the face. FML
Top comments
perdix 31
Stupid mom! Boiling water would work much better.
Pleonasm 36
Wake up and smell the morning ice-cold water!
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Comments (133)
olpally 33
Shut up, meg... Lol. Better than having the mumps!
DocBastard 40
Wow, that's cold! Your mother sounds like a cold-hearted bitch.
BriannaRWatson 13
You're such a troll lol.
flockz 20
doc has always had burr-y good puns.
Pleonasm 36
... *crickets chirping*
SenselessPattern 12
Crickets have their work cut out for them here.
JudgeTroll 6
Doc, what's the pic of now, besides a human skull?
KiddNYC1O 22
A human skull with a clearly visible fractured jaw and bad breath...............
xcarxcrashx 9
It's some guys busted up jaw, read Doc's blog. It's very good.
SquishFish 15
Haha my dad does this to me too.... A lot. I feel your pain OP
omnomnicon 9
Maybe you should invest in an alarm clock instead :)
laurenlovesjb 20
Wake up and breathe in the day... Oh wait hold your breath, you'll choke:)
Warmonger_Smurf 29
You do realize that everyone will be voting thumbs down on you, just for your profile pic.
olpally 33
Yes 42, we've covered this several times on previous fml's, leave the bieber fan alone. Lol. Good day to you. :)
JudgeTroll 6
I wish the Biebs had taken a deep morning breath
fernclogger 5
As it is, I used to hate getting woken up by my parents ripping the blankets away... Feel for you OP
supportcommand 17
I think a sleeping hand in warm water is acceptable payback.
Myo_fml 20
For what? Combating pins and needles?
russfml 31
It makes you wet the bed lol
Myo_fml 20
No, his poor grammar and word structure made the sentence mean that the hand was asleep, not the entire person. I enjoy nitpicking and being a bitch, it's kind of my thing.
supportcommand 17
If you truly had trouble understanding my post you should step away from FML. I suspect you post things just so you can see your name on here. After all, you've had 7 rejected FMLs.
HeyArnold91 8
You must get tired of having to wait got your sheets to dry all the time
shannara098 1
That's sucks I would do the same thing back
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Next time she washes the dishes, tie a rubber band to the spray nozzle.