Today, my husband woke me up at 3 AM by putting whipped cream on my hand and tickling my nose with a feather. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after struggling for hours to fall asleep with my husband's rather rattling snoring, I finally managed to drop off… only to be rudely awakened an hour later by my husband elbowing me in the face in his sleep. FML
Today, I woke up to my husband trying to bite my forehead in his sleep. My response? I slapped him hard in the face. What a way to wake up. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML
Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML
Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML
Today, while in deep sleep, I was suddenly awoken by a tickle on my face and nearly threw my cat off the bed. Apparently, 4 a.m. Is the perfect time to touch noses with your human. FML
Today, my husband rolled over in his sleep, cuddled up to me, and lovingly whispered “I love you Pizza Hut...” FML
Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML
Today, my husband tried to be romantic by throwing me in a bed laid with roses. Too bad he forgot to remove the thorns first. FML
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
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Top comments
Fredzter 0
HAHAHA!! He is my hero! If you don't want him, I'll take him!! :D
iDemonChild 0
Lol. Whipped cream and tickling your nose... Classic. =D
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Comments (183)
iFruit 0
I'm confuzzled ; what's so bad about it? Like, unless you had a big day tomorrow, you had a rough night, or you were sick, there's really not a reaon to be angry, just annoyed. Lighten up, OP!
tallguy42 0
It kinda sucks that he did it at 3 in the morning and sorry about your nose. :( I've got to wonder though, how do you break your nose by being tickled with a feather? And if that didn't happen you've got to appreciate that at least your husband is entertaining. :) That does suck though, and it's made worse by all the people that blame you just because they didn't read your comment.
citylights 0
Your husband is awesome.
buddy51 23
this FML courtesy of/stolen from a burger king commercial!
uj_fml 4
I really don't see why this is a problem.
b_r_a_tpack23 0
duude thaats fuuny. my boyfriend would probably do this if we lived together.
GlennD 0
Wow, you got cream on your nose! your life is so ****** up!
indiana_gal 0
classic!
ElzLovesMyChem 0
it could've been worse. He could have put like mayo or peanut butter on. I'd love to wake up with a nose full of cream. ^_^
Redrosesandrain 0
that's kind of sweet.... if you think about it like.... well.... no, there is no way to think about it as being sweet. unless.... whipped cream is sweet! yeah! there we go! honestly, though, it is kind of awesome.... take a joke.