Today, my girlfriend, who I've loved and dated for over a year, confessed that she's actually straight as an arrow. All this time, she's basically been using me as an accessory to enhance her "social status" and make her guy friends horny. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend told me that she's a lesbian. And that she could only stay with me because I had a "girly face and voice". She also admitted to having a crush on my sister. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend is actually a man. Not a transgender person, I'm okay with that, but an actual gay man who gets a kick out of pranking other guys. FML
Today, I learned that the girl I love thinks I'm gay. To be honest, I'm having doubts too. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she's totally convinced I'm gay. When I tried explaining that I can't be if I'm attracted to her, she took it as me thinking she's mannish. FML
Today, the girl I'd been dating online for 6 months told me she was a guy. I said it was alright, and that I was still in love. Then she confessed she really was a girl, and was just trying to make me dump her so she wouldn't be the "bad guy". FML
Today, the girl I thought I was dating introduced me to her boyfriend. We've gone on dates and have slept in the same bed, but it turns out she thought I was her gay best friend and was planning to introduce me to her boyfriend's brother. FML
Today, I found out the reason my crush has been talking so openly to me. Not because she likes me back, but because she thinks I'm gay. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I really feel about her, due in no small part to how flirty she's been towards me lately. Turns out she's really just a skank and was trying to make my best friend "jealous". He's gay. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years confessed that at first, she'd only dated me to get her friend jealous, and that even now, she "only kind of liked" me. I bought a ring only a few days ago, and was planning on proposing to her. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to tell her something important. Coincidentally, she did too. She wanted to tell me that she thinks she's actually gay. I wanted to tell her I love her. FML
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Top comments
BriannaSkyy 5
Wow. That was rather mean.
msilikegrapes 8
take that metaphorical arrow and shank it through her b**** ass heart
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Comments (207)
chocolatepandas 2
Tell her that she just "lost" her fashion accessory.
purpledrizzle 5
OP I'm so sorry, that wench is horrible. How could she pretend to be a lesbian for over a year?
notnertyelkcub 1
She would have sex with the op and say she enjoyed it, and that she doesn't like penis.
perdix 31
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
What are you complaining about? You got high-quality pussy for a year -- that's more than a lot of straight guys get! Be thankful for the mammaries and move on!
freshberries22 17
Who knows if it was high quality it might've been a big sloppy mess but one is willing to put up with a lot for love
youjustmademelol 4
You've obviously never had your heart broken...
Shrike 24
You've obviously never read Perdix's comments before. Hint: they're not meant to be taken seriously, even when they flat-out suck, which they almost always do.
Justy101 23
31 - I can almost guarantee that it would have been a sloppy mess.... ;)
perdix 31
#31 & 79, nah, if she's the kind of lesbian that makes her guy friends horny, you can bet that the quality is top-shelf. I thought the "mammaries" pun would save this comment from burial.
ygdrassil 17
I voted you up, Perdix. Partly because I got your sarcasm and partly out of tradition.
legitkitty 11
That's what I hate about commenting. Your comments get buried because nearly everyone takes it to seriously and doesn't understand your sarcasm. :p
AKGirlinSD 20
I'm with 109. Perdix's sarcasm always gets a laugh and thumbs up out of me.
Eluveitie 9
Yeah, who needs love when you can have "high quality pussy". She stated that she loved her very much, and that bitch used her. Yeah what the hell are you complaining about? Gee, I ******* wonder.
angelhernandez 0
**Memories
rattusrattus 19
Wow. I didn't think people actually pulled this shit in real life. OP, I hope you dumped them for using you, and I hope your future partners are decent human beings who love and respect you as much as you do them. Now. To the OP's (hopefully ex) girlfriend. There are more ethical ways to get men horny. Grow the **** up and be a person who treats others with respect instead of using them. If you can't do this, I hope your friends grow up and leave your sorry arse all alone.
Somerandomkidz 0
You should write a book about it.
jzbajus 8
^ and he goes for the win!
Bebbo_fml 21
It's also possible that your girlfriend could be one of those people who feel ashamed of their sexuality and is just giving you an excuse to try and be "straight." Regardless op, you deserve better
hockeykyle10 5
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Holy shit this turns me on!!
DracoSpirita 21
Good for you. Now go away.
pizzaboy69 4
Ydi for being lesbian
ManInTheMachine 20
Shit, they deleted it. Oh well.
littledancer55 1
Wow! I hope you dumped her fake ass!!
TheBedMonster 5
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Wow I am sooo sorry OP!!! I can't believe that bitch did that to you!!! You deserve someone soooo much better!! Get rid of that bitch and find an other girl who will treat you well. You sound perfect and you derseve to be treated perfect as well
jweezy89 4
She sounds perfect? There is almost no personal info in the FML. Don't just instantly assume the op is always a poor little victim. For all you know, this may be exactly what op deserves.
the_true_batman 10
I'm surprised people aren't wondering about the sex. It seems hard to believe the two of them didn't have sex in that year, and it seems even more psycho to have sex with a gender you're not attracted to just for her stupid reasons. I know I'd never do it.
dominic1221 6
Yeah but you're not a psycho. Are you, bats? Whatever. Getting eaten out's a little milder than getting penetrated in the rear end anyway. I think girls tend to be more open to experimentation anyway, but I could be wrong. Any females wanna weigh in on this?
kimg0885 23
I kissed a girl, and I did not like it. No cherry Chapstick.
the_true_batman 10
I'm not sure if psychos are aware of the fact that their psychos. I guess I was a psycho in American Psycho, or (spoiler alert) was I? I can't believe someone could spend a year pretending to have a relationship with someone they completely disregarded the feelings of.
the_true_batman 10
Ugh, I was up all night and my grammar was suffering. I slept and just woke up and thought my problem would be solved. I get annoyed by terrible grammar, but I get pissed when it's my mistake. I guess to add value to this comment: I hope you find true love OP, follow your heart and all your wildest dreams will come true.
dominic1221 6
Yeah, but your argument has one fatal flaw: it did happen. Besides, I've known of several bitches even crazier than this one.
the_true_batman 10
I'm a little lost, whose argument has a flaw? I'm not really sure what argument there was, unless you're saying dom is wrong and penetration did happen. That would make sense, it seems likely two girls who've been together for a year penetrated each other with fingers and toys. EDIT: you know women who are crazier than someone who faked a relationship for a year? It seems hard to believe people like that could exist.
dominic1221 6
Pay attention to the names under each comment. I said your argument has a flaw because yeah, the OP's girlfriend did do all that shit, presumably. Whether you have a hard time imagining being that psycho doesn't make a difference to the situation. People are ******* nuts.
the_true_batman 10
Oh yeah, sorry, that was you. I think you misinterpreted what I meant. I wasn't making any argument, I was just saying that I've heard crazy things before, but this is just unbelievable. I wasn't arguing anything.