By awkwardparents - 06/08/2012 08:13 - United States - Burlingame
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11- I must say I am guilty of that. I always figure that if your personality and action speak loud enough, you don't need to have anything written on you. I do think you're right though and I try to stop myself from judging them. The person who trained me for my summer job before college has a tattoo sleeve, gauges, and a nose ring. I was incredibly disappointed and was ready for a long summer. She turned out to be an incredibly nice woman who I respect. You have to agree though, the tattoo stereotype is a strong one. Most people that I've met with tattoos aren't the best of people. So it's still unfair for us to judge everyone with a tattoo, but someone with a tattoo should be able to at least understand.
54- as a person with tattoos, I can totally see where you can coming from because tattoos use to be considered a form of rebellion. But today they are more excepted, maybe not older generations though. And everyone has different views instilled in them as they grow up. Tattoos for me are my way of expressing myself instead of with words. That's just the way I am. So try not to jump to conclusions about people with tattoos. We can be pretty nice people. :)
I just wanna play devils advocate as say that some gang members haven't been arrested. Newer members still have to prove themselves. I do have tattoos. Three actually. When I worked at McDs I got my first one. Mine are easy to cover and hide without much effort and my uniform covered it. She was still a bitch. So I do understand the discrimination. Sorry for your luck OP. maybe you could be the one who changes their outlook on tattoos!
54 it seems like everyone and their mom have tattoo's nowadays. I Have 2 tattoo's 20 piercing (12 if which are in my ears and 2 are gauged) but when I talk to people they see me how I want them to see me I have never been ostrisized for the way that I look and what judgement people may have for me doesn't bother me whatsoever I am 22 married to a success man own a house and am an aspiring hairstylist. Now the parents that said they didn't want their kids around me when I was younger wish their children turned out more like me.
Well, 90, I think that could be the problem. I live in an area where tattoos aren't as common in other places. This makes the outlook on tattoos around here more negative than in a place where tattoos are more common. Maybe the parents were from an area like mine. It's hard to pick sides on this. OP's parents definitely we're rude. But, the parents are also making sure their child is in a relationship that is safe. I'd agree, this is a "your life sucks", because OP defiantly didn't deserve it.
I think this is so sad. It's 2012 and people still judge each other, ofc I understand that tattoos aren't as common everywhere and that they on some places still just belong to criminals, but for most people it's just art. Some people choose to buy a nice painting, I make a tattoo to carry with me all the time.
'even been arrested?' you make it sound like being arrested is a normal thing.
20- though I agree with you, I would say that good people who have been arrested have a broader aspect on life. I was arrested one time, and it was absolutely horrible. But to tell you the truth, I was following a path that veered from where I wanted to go in life. I'm glad that I was stopped, and think that going to jail impacted me tremendously and affected my adult life more than any other experience I've had so far.
Uhm how? Never even been is pretty much linguistic code for "I have never engaged in behavior that justifies your thought pattern" In this case they have little to no grounds to suspect him of gang affiliation judging it solely on the tattoos because in their opinion that is the only reason to have one.
In their defense they don't know that and are just being safe.. you should be happy they care about their daughter so much :)
In their ignorance, tattoos != gangs. I'm up to the outline of my first tattoo curently. Getting it finished in a week, then working on plans for the next one. I work 40 hours a week, go out nd support local rock musicians, many of whom are now my friends, and play video games in my free time. A simple tattoo wouldn't give that a way, so why judge based on it. Another good example is the pic of the EMT or doctor or whatever shown in his uniform and in street clothes, decked out in tattoos, it must suck to have people assume you're in a gang cause of your art, when you might be saving their life tomorrow.
Gangs have tats marks for members and affiliates. If they live in or near gang-infested areas (or ever have, because violence makes you wary), they can't be expected to keep up on all the latest gang tats. In some places in the US, just walking with a gang member/affiliate can get you shot in broad daylight.
5- What if OP and the girlfriend break up? Then OP is stuck with a permanent reminder of what happened. And if OP does get into trouble with the law and the cops see that tattoo, they're never going to believe it was just to mess with someone's parents.
I hate when people look down at others just because of their tattoos or piercings. A lot of people seem to associate tattoos with rebellion.
Well the thing is that stereotypes exist for a reason. Sure, maybe 49% of people with tattoos are respectable citizens, but that doesn't cover over for the 51% who are "rebels". Another thing is that those "rebels" are the ones whose conducts are much more publicly noticeable - so blame them if you will for the negative image they've given to tattoo-bearers.
IMO, tattoos look pretty trashy for the most part. Thumb me down if you will, but you don't see people in respected positions or at classy places covered in ink. And like 28 said, yeah, there are some respectable people with tattoos, but again, the stereotype doesn't come out of nowhere.
I sincerely doubt more than half of people with tattoos are thugs. Most people I know who are inked are perfectly pleasant, law-abiding citizens. In contrast, my non-inked brother and his non-inked friends mug people for fun. Using tattoos as simply another means of stereotyping is ridiculous. You don't know why people choose to get them. I got mine in memory of my father. My actress friend is getting comedy and tragedy on her hips.
I don't understand that justification... "Oh its okay because they hid theirs. Doesn't matter that lawyer a has tattoos covering his entire back, but since lawyer b has one on his forearm and I saw it when he took his jacket off its bad." I have a calf tattoo. Its a piece of art that I drew for the artist to put on my body. And the story behind it would make anyone who judged me for it think twice about doing it ever again.
Tattoos are a way of branding your body with what is important to you. Saying its ok to stereotype because "most people I know who have tattoos are bad people" is kind of outdated. It's a choice and saying that it's trashy is something I would expect my baptist grandmother to say. It's extremely traditional and closed minded.
Speaking as someone who has ink and has worked in a tattoo shop, I have to tell tatted people to quit whining. We all knew the stigma associated with our art when we got it done. People judge. There are 3 common reasons to get ink... 1) I'll get a ____ tattoo, so everyone who sees it will know I like ____. 2) I got so drunk/am so easily influenced by peers that I ended up with "YOLO" across my knuckles (or similar mistake). I did not premeditate, but everyone who sees it will know I'm a dumbass. 3) This person/deity/idea/philosophy/event/group means so much to me that I want to make it a permanent part of my body, so everyone who sees it will know what he/she/they/it mean(t) to me and as a reminder to myself. Tats are like clothes we can never change. We put what we do on our bodies to show some part of ourselves. But when we put ourselves on display, we give others the privilege of judging us.
Yes 65, because, since they mug people it means either A) they will get tats at some point in their lives, maybe even after they stop and grow up; or B) they already have them hidden somewhere. Its not at all possible from some punk ass kid to just be punk ass kid if he's not inked.
I know many people get tattoos with a meaning behind them, but most people that I know personally who have tats got something like butterflies on their ankles or Hello Kitty because it's "cute". I feel that some things are overdone and people get them just to be cool or rebellious, and it has no meaning to them. I also don't understand getting a tattoo on your back or bum; it can hardly have that much meaning to you if you can't even see it yourself. I think one or two tattoos can be beautiful on a person but I'm not a fan of huge pieces like sleeve; you lose the uniqueness of the individual images IMHO.
Drigr, it's covered under reason #3 as a group or idea that means so much to a person that he/she makes it a part of his/her body. 107- See reason #1. Just because you think Hello Kitty is overdone doesn't mean it isn't personal to someone else. Maybe they just like it a lot. Maybe it reminds them of their childhood. Maybe they just think their tattoo is pretty, like wearing permanent jewelry. I know many people only do it to be cool or rebel, but even motives are a part of who we are.
Tattoos are just wearable art. That's it. I think they can be beautiful on the right people, and trashy on the wrong people. I have a tattoo, but I am a straight a student, I have a job, I'm going to college, and I plan on studying to be a fertility doctor. The stereotype that tattoos are only for thugs is so old, it's 2012, get over it.
While some people judge me for my angel wings on my back, my parents actually paid for mine as a graduation gift and love them. Mine has a lot of meaning, but I do agree some tattoos are ridiculous and pointless. Just because people have tattoos does not mean they are delinquents.
Just because you haven't been arrested, it doesn't mean you're not part of a gang, and as parents it's their job to protect their daughter. At least they'll see that there is nothing to worry about
Do they have access to a database of gang tattoos? Unless they're law enforcement it's not likely. It seems your girlfriend's parents are a little bit over protective. Sorry OP that you're judged by your tats.