Miscellaneous: Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I...

By megean c.l. - 20/01/2013 21:36 - United States

Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 837

You deserved it 8 018

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Same thing different taste

Backfire

By Anonymous - 14/07/2012 20:10 - Nigeria - Lagos

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 173

You deserved it 54 736

By Autocorrected - 26/11/2012 20:13 - Philippines - Makati

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 461

You deserved it 3 375

By inalotofpain - 16/04/2011 12:46 - United States

Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 468

You deserved it 3 906

By lucas_urev - 15/09/2014 22:19 - United States - Cold Spring Harbor

Today, I had made a cup of my favorite coffee, which I had recently found to be discontinued. To accompany this last cup, I went to get a muffin. As I turned around, I see my son pouring the cup out because I out put it next to the sink and he thought it was dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 750

You deserved it 7 129

By squeltorey - 03/08/2012 19:28 - United States - Whittier

Today, after waking up, I went into the kitchen and took a swig of milk from the carton. I overestimated my strength, and the whole thing splashed all over my face. A few moments later, my dad staggered in, looked at me in disgust, and said, "You know what? I don't even wanna know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 817

You deserved it 11 165

By Anonymous - 03/12/2011 10:05 - United Kingdom

Today, I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge, not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salty water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 167

You deserved it 8 167

By NaCl - 24/05/2014 21:20 - United States - Duluth

Today, my mother-in-law came over for dinner. She decided to salt the food I was preparing without even tasting it first, then complained at dinner that I'd used too much salt. She then lectured me on the proper seasoning of food for the rest of the evening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 694

You deserved it 4 057

For science

By Rach - 26/10/2023 04:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was making some tea for my colleagues when I accidentally dropped the tea bag into my cup of coffee. I thought, "Why not?" and took a sip. It tasted like a caffeinated botanical disaster, and the whole office got to enjoy me retch for 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 207

You deserved it 679

Just eat it

By salt bomb - 02/03/2023 07:00 - United States

Today, I spent all day carefully preparing a wonderful homemade beef and vegetable stew from scratch. Close to dinner time, I tasted it and it was inedibly salty. Confused, my horrifically bratty stepdaughter then laughed and admitted she poured salt in it because it wasn’t what she wanted for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 251

You deserved it 126

Great boyfriend, part 2

By thanks a lot - 04/05/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend made me a latte. It tasted off, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I drank it. Turns out he put laxatives in it as a prank. The idiot couldn’t just use one or two. He used so many that I had to go to the ER for severe dehydration after puking and shitting for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 896

You deserved it 198

patrickalamo 47

Monday 21 January 2013 1:58

Remind him you will be picking out his nursing home.

Isoldael 27

Monday 21 January 2013 2:04

My parents use the other approach: "Would you like some coffee?" "Sure!" "Good, then make me some too!"

Comments

mark1970 10

Monday 21 January 2013 8:30

What a jerk should have told the kid at the get go

xRezSynn 15

Monday 21 January 2013 12:44

If the wine he drinks is dark in color, pour him vinegar instead. I did it to my dad, except it was by accident :P

Hoosiers1 1

Monday 21 January 2013 13:41

Not fml worthy.

alfred07 18

Monday 21 January 2013 16:00

Or next time he could just say no if the effort of making extra coffee is too much for him

doglover100 28

Monday 21 January 2013 17:13

The prank war is on

Relenaz 9

Monday 21 January 2013 21:17

Salt in coffee?? Really?

trivel64 16

Monday 21 January 2013 21:30

FML used STFU!

Ramo_11 8

Tuesday 22 January 2013 7:27

Revenge is a cup best served cold.

Punksister19 10

Tuesday 22 January 2013 20:16

Stupid Nero's.

Crzysht96 3

Wednesday 23 January 2013 2:26

Put dried up rabbit shit in the can.

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 44 476

You deserved it 3 043

Today, I'd always wanted a baby girl, so much so I wound up with four boys before deciding I couldn’t handle another pregnancy. The eldest two hate their dad, the youngest two hate me, and all four of them hate each other. FML

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You deserved it 540

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 43 280

You deserved it 4 385

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I agree, your life sucks 4 626

You deserved it 273

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I agree, your life sucks 28 613

You deserved it 3 501

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I agree, your life sucks 11 365

You deserved it 76 152

Today, in a desperate attempt to add some variety to my life, I resorted to closing my eyes and picking a random font for my essay paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 787

You deserved it 7 795

Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 527

You deserved it 9 405