By I'm screwed - 13/01/2013 01:30 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I found out that my sleep-walking is so bad that I regularly text my friend while I sleep. I have no idea how many times this has happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 614
You deserved it 3 501

Same thing different taste

Top comments

vencku 13

I'm curious what these texts are. Nonsense? A love confession? Asking for mommy?

ant1ion 12

Maybe you should lock it or hide it before sleeping


ant1ion 12

Maybe you should lock it or hide it before sleeping

She would need someone else within the house to hide it, because although she's sleeping she would still be able to recall where she hid it. And same with locking it, as soon as the actions became routine her subconscious self would pick up on it and just go back to doing it again.

Sir_ND_Pity 35

12 - I would construct a labyrith with traps, such as shooting arrows, spikey pits, wild animals, etc. and put the phone at the center. That should prevent the acquisition of the phone. Problem solved :)

And if her subconscious self weaved its way through this labyrinth?

Sir_ND_Pity 35

Then she obviously deserves to use that phone :D

No no. Havent you ever seen those shows where the sleep walking or incoherent person narrowly dodges every trap. #16 beat me.

He needs to stop mixing xanax and ambien. Then you wont be sleep walking anymore.

conholio33 28

Maybe its time to lock your phone while you sleep so you dont send random texts

IworkAt711 14

I'm pretty sure if she could type out words in her sleep, that she will be able to type in a password.

Just hide it in your wardrobe or something before you sleep :)

vencku 13

I'm curious what these texts are. Nonsense? A love confession? Asking for mommy?

I once had the girl I was dating text me about a purple kangaroo and wanting to feed it a banana in her sleep. that shit was funny

Maybe she was hinting you in a very 'unique' way. ;)

Hinting at what?? What on earth would a purple kangaroo and a banana hint towards?

I feel so weird replying to an old FML, but I sleep-text sometimes. Once I sleep-texted my ex "I wAnt you." Hahaha I was dating him at the time though, so no awkward explanation had to be made. :P

when you fall asleep you become another person, so there is only one choice; become a superhero. you could probably be more useful than the human sponge.

Almost as bad as ”texting while drunk.”

Why was texting while drunk put in parentheses?

Those are quotation marks. Parentheses are the curvy lines(like this).

If it's a text, shouldn't you have records of what you sent unless you deleted it right after?

My phone only keeps the last 25 unless I change it.

You must be an extremely devious person to not only send someone msgs under your own name without consent, but to hide it from yourself as well. You are your own worst enemy.

Evening if that was the case, he'd atleast have an idea of what he texted if he checked it when he woke up.

I can't wait to see the texts on

Nononono. OP's texts to her friend are real, they would never fit in with all the fakes.

Sir_ND_Pity 35

Just count the number of times you've texted "Hdincudkn" to your girlfriend and you should have a rough estimate. If you can't find any of those messages, I must say I'm impressed at how well you text in your sleep! Bravo :)

I don't think that's really any of our business...

Maybe not, but it'll paint an interesting picture for this...

Silent_Thrill 17

I sexted in my sleep once. My boss was not very amused...