Today, my dad walked in on me jacking off. He swore and told me to lock my door next time. Later on I heard him snickering and telling my mom that I "jack off real weird." FML
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Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in, i'm naked!" She said "That's okay!" so she unlocked the door and walked in. I was masturbating. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me using the bathroom. After rushing out, he yelled at me through the door for not locking it. He made up the "no locking the doors inside the house" rule. FML
Today, my dad unlocked the bathroom door and barged in without warning only to catch me, with no clothes on, masturbating. He said, "sorry" but stayed for another 20 seconds to look for his shampoo. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me jerking off. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I wasn’t Skyping my boyfriend, while both of us were totally naked. I had just told him to “put those toes in your mouth and I’ll cum like you’ve never seen before”. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom's boyfriend jacking off. The worst part was that he didn't stop. FML
Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, after a shower, my dad jokingly asked if I was jacking off in the shower because I was taking a long time. Before I could respond, my mom chimed in with, "No, he does it before he showers, haven't you noticed how he locks himself in his room?" She was right on the money. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh, I had an itch…" FML
Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML
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Top comments
macystar 14
I think it's a little more weird that your parents are discussing your jacking off skills.
fylsinceydi 2
How do you jack off weird?
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Comments (131)
Gangsterrface 10
Locks WERE made for a reason...
alycion 38
You think people who frequent this site would have learned to lock doors by now. It takes an extra second. And it's not like they are complicated to use.
Gangsterrface 10
Right?!
Devul143 12
Don't peiple ******* knock anymore? my parents never just WALKED into my room...
LanaRenee13 6
mine did. they paid the bills, so they did what they wanted.
rundas09 8
Mine did too. Closed doors were a no-no.
Ksweety_fml 27
Wow
Gb1625 7
lol
FrankHotpants 31
If you're going to choke the chicken, punch the clown, hog tie the dolphin, or man handle the meat saw always ensure the door is locked.
LanaRenee13 6
hahaha. I'm so sorry.
Saikon1357 25
Well do you?
seetherxoxaddict 7
lmao sucks to be yooou xD
little_one 20
Knocks or locks either way that's just disrespectful. My father in law caught my hubby doing the five finger death punch to girly vids at a young age and all he said was of thank god you're straight... So it could be worse...?
VSVP_fml 6
You must of doing something real crazy if he said you jack off weird.