Today, my dad told me he has money set aside for when he has to bail me out of jail, because "it's bound to happen sooner or later." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad called for the first time in six months. He needs someone to bail him out of jail. FML
Today, I found out my father has been saving money to help me buy my first car. In the same conversation, I found out my mother, unbeknownst to my dad, used nearly all of the money to bail my drunken, deadbeat uncle out of jail for the fourth time a month ago. He's now back in prison. FML
Today, I found out that my dad has been trying to take money out of my savings account to pay for divorce fees and a hammock. FML
Today, my mom cleaned out my bank account, saying my "no-good dad" owes her child support and that she'll get it one way or another. FML
Today, my dad had something to tell me. He'd cleaned out my bank account to pay off 38,000 dollars worth of gambling debt. My wedding is in 5 months. FML
Today, I finally told my dad that he owes me over 400 dollars, and that I need it or else I'd get kicked out of my apartment. He only gave me 70 and said to get a better job. FML
Today, my dad asked me to lend him some money to buy his medication, since he's all but broke right now. He returned with nothing but a bottle of tequila. FML
Today, my dad refuses to let me inherit all of his money, which might just put a roof over my head when I’m older. *His* money? Well, actually, he inherited it. FML
Today, my sister finally broke down and told me that our dad gambled away of all my college savings, and I would have to pay for school the best way I can. They have known for months, and when I asked why nobody told me, the reply was, "You're a college boy, we thought you would figure it out." FML
Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML
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Top comments
melissamoshh 0
How thoughtful
whiskuit 0
Now there's something you can't call a... *puts on sunglasses* ...trust fund. YEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH
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Comments (278)
shadows17 0
true that
holmes4l 1
lol that's great lol
kewlaidman10 15
At least hes looking out for you
falloutgod15 0
you should go to a police station and have them pretend to arrest u so that ur dad will have to bail u out, and once he gets there, make. him give the cops the bail money and when ur dad isn't around get the money from the cops... but ve sure to give the cops some of the dough to make it worth their time :D
lanier25n 7
Aha, bummer
joncurn99 1
That's pretty smart
greenpurpleblack 2
you have a nice family haha
whipmie87 0
my dad has that too! mine is for a DUI tho, he says it's because I am his daughter (he's had like 7 in his lifetime) lol.
IHeartJimi02 0
Is your profile pic from true blood?
iHateThisLife 10
wow ur dad has low expectaions
hahahah12 0
My dad did the same thing. However, he didn't have the money the second time.