Today, my boyfriend went to the aquarium. We were noticing the fishy smell, and I had made a comment about it. Then my boyfriend slowly, and seductively whispers into my ear, "It sort of reminds me of how you smell." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML
Today, my boyfriend leaned over and sniffed me like a dog. He does this almost every day, even in front of people sometimes. FML
Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me my first compliment in months. Apparently my body spray makes me smell like a stripper. He then asked me if he could "park the beef bus in tuna town". FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
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Top comments
Shlizabeth 0
Well, clearly he brought you there to show you the importance of personal hygiene.
kahaari 0
three words? clean. your. vag.
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Comments (309)
slatertheblob 0
u probably smell fin
reki_fml 0
jandersoniii: I'll pay you $50 to show me your **** on webcam.
Tri_fml 5
wash your ****.
angel03260 0
12 ilove you made me laugh more then the post
MrZach 0
#9, you're right, they don't have cooties.. They have aids, herpes, the clap, crabs, gonorrhea... etc etc
MattTS 2
jandersonii, go make me dinner. On a more serious note. If a man didn't clean himself I suspect you'd go mad about how he expected to put his "disgusting penis" inside of a woman. Stop playing the victim and being a pain in the arse and you might get treated equally. Many women will sexualise themselves one minute and the next complain about sexism. The "all sex is rape" argument is just so ridiculous it hurts. Women can want and enjoy sex too. It's not just a social pressure there's a biological impetus for both genders to want sex.
thelastgirl 0
anyone ever consider he just has a sense of humour?
Kimberlyy1107 0
you just got OWNED
AshleyRose784 0
Somebody skipped health class, clean yourself!
lmmmr 0
The ****** is a self-cleaning oven.