Today, my boyfriend went to the aquarium. We were noticing the fishy smell, and I had made a comment about it. Then my boyfriend slowly, and seductively whispers into my ear, "It sort of reminds me of how you smell." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML
Today, my boyfriend leaned over and sniffed me like a dog. He does this almost every day, even in front of people sometimes. FML
Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me my first compliment in months. Apparently my body spray makes me smell like a stripper. He then asked me if he could "park the beef bus in tuna town". FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's apartment and I smelled a delicious aroma as I walked in so I asked him what he was cooking. His response was, "I'm not cooking anything. I just farted." FML
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Top comments
Shlizabeth 0
Well, clearly he brought you there to show you the importance of personal hygiene.
kahaari 0
three words? clean. your. vag.
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Comments (309)
Naheelawhatwhat 0
WASH YOUR PUSSY ONCE IN A WHILE YOU NASTY BITCH!
Ric3ball 0
ROFL I LOL'D
breakthesky 0
Seductively? Eh, at least he likes it...? :/
anonymous18_fml 0
ARE YOU KIDDING ME? "If it smells like cologne, leave it alone, If it smells like fish... IT'S A TASTY DISH!" All women have a particular smell down there. The people who are grossed out by this FML are obviously immature or haven't had very much sexual experience.
gabrielbaby 9
I agree not to mention your not supposed to clean it, it's actually unhealthy and can cause yeast infections, or other issues.
cutebutpsycho 0
jandersoniii, sex is actually not rape, except when it is nonconsensual sex. This is defined by whether or not either partner says 'no', or whether or not either partner is considered at or above the 'age of consent'. I will try to argue--just because you are a 'queer studies Phd' at the University of Eastern New Mexico doesn't mean you are right. Men did not invent sex, whether you believe in creation or evolution because 1) God is not a gender and 2) animals have been having sex for a long time. It's how we procreate. I don't really want to explain this to you, however, because I think that you not procreating is a good thing.
vansbabe66 0
Wow.. Why you even post this up
adventurepaws 0
Jandersoliii = A TRUE IDIOT
cutebutpsycho 0
OP: either take a shower once in a while or date a fisherman.
aback 5
It's not supposed to smell like fish. There's a certain infection that will do that. Time to visit the doc!
lmmmr 0
Jandersoniii, if you do in fact have a PhD in queer studies then you know that there are much more productive and beneficial things you could be doing for the cause of equality than spewing irrelevant and unnecessary definitions of human sexuality as violence. And if you're not actually concerned with helping the cause then please don't state yourself as an expert on the intentions of it, as you are undermining everyone who is.