theawfulpresent
Germantown, United States
Today, my boyfriend tried to hypnotize me into breaking up with him. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Ella
United States
Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML
Anonymous
United States
Get out
Today, my boyfriend tried to break up with me again, and actually offered me gas money so that I would leave. FML
confusedandnowsingle
Espoo, Finland
Today, my boyfriend's proposal speech somehow ended with him breaking up with me. FML
stuck
Hägersten, Sweden
Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He decided to lock me in the apartment until I say that we are in fact still together. This is the 4th time he has done this. FML
ihateguys
San Francisco, United States
Today, I heard my boyfriend talking with my father in the backyard. I thought he was asking for my hand in marriage. He was actually telling him about his plans to break up with me. FML
and he wonders why I'm anxious
Netherlands
Today, after years of torment by my anxiety disorders and therapy and medication not helping, I've made the decision to try hypnosis. After doing a Google search and finding out my therapist is a man, my overly jealous fiancé insisted on joining, "because he might hypnotise you into cheating." FML
alltern8ive
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Like in the movies
Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt, then stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML
HelpPlease
San Francisco, United States
Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. Midway through the speech I'd prepared, I fainted and hit my head against a wall. FML
hh.
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Clear Lake, United States
Oh, the humanity
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house to break up with him. When I got there, I got sent on a scavenger hunt that ended with him proposing to me. FML
catt
Berlin, Germany
Today, my boyfriend tried to rid me of my hiccups. As he'd screamed at me and I'd pissed my pants, I just burst into tears. FML
Top comments
thelittlebirdie 9
2 reasons to take his advice: A) he obviously doesn't want to be with you. B) He's an idiot....
Jeffo193 13
What a coward, why doesn't he just break up with you? Unless you're some kind of psycho stalker who refuses to be broken up with, in which case I'd take the hint...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (76)
lishajoy777 14
"oh Im just gonna hypnotize my girlfriend today maybe I can maker her break up with me.... damn didnt work new plan"
GTAmax99 12
How could he think that would work?
LightsxOut 10
Why don't you hypnotize him back into believing that he's an idiot?
TechFire 25
He needs to be hypnotized to realize that?
jellyghost 12
maybe he hypnotized you into going out with him, felt guilty after getting to know you and is trying to restore balance...yeah thats it.
perdix 29
Now, he'll get sympathy sex from the next girls who want to console him for you dumping him. Dumpers don't get pity *****, dumpees do.
klovemachine 24
Not unless the dumper lies about being the dumper
perdix 29
#57, that'll work if you live in a big city, but if you live in a small town, the dumpee could expose your lie, and you'd get sent back to the Jerk Store. I was dating this girl for three years and the last one sucked, and just as I was about to dump her, she dumped me. What a blessing! I milked it for all it was worth!
xRezSynn 15
That's....new.
dontpanic_fml 32
My ex tried to pull this shit. He honestly tried to get me to cheat on him with a friend so either I would break up with him or he could break up with me. These people are sick; he should've just broken up with you. For your sake I hope you granted his wish.
RedPillSucks 31
How in the world did he try to get you to cheat on him? *Check out my friend Josh? Don't you think he's hot? I'll be out of town all week and he's volunteered to check up on you while I'm gone. I hear he likes to sleep around, but you wouldn't step out on me, would you*
dontpanic_fml 32
Close. He had our mutual friend meet us at a club during a party after (as I found out later) intentionally being distant, picking a fight and leaving me for most of the evening. He was also a troubled serial cheater. He did break up with me the next morning when he found out I wasn't a cheater. Details were later revealed to me by another mutual friend. I'm sorry, are you honestly inquiring or are you trying to imply that I made that up? Because maybe I shouldn't have posted it but I can't think of a single reason in the world why I would make something like that up.
RedPillSucks 31
No, I was honestly inquiring, if a bit incredulously. Sometimes human behavior just boggles my mind.
dontpanic_fml 32
Oh yes, it is mind boggling for sure. Very mind boggling...
ninneyfooda 16
So in the end, you broke up with him. Are you sure you did it of your own volition?
GarageDragon 22
Talk about spineless... If my boyfriend did that I'd take the hint and dump him. You deserve better OP.
spliit_fml 8
Seems like you didn't care enough to break up with him after that.
igive 29
Maybe she didn't out of spite.
BostonBear 33
that would be my guess too