By unseeable - 29/08/2014 21:21 - United States - Gilbert

Today, I got a job. My parents have decided it's now a better idea to take money from my paycheck instead of grounding me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 533
You deserved it 6 176

unseeable tells us more.

To clear up some questions I wanna start by saying I'm 17 and currently training to be a manager at mcdonalds. I work 40 hours a week and go to high school as a senior. I don't have much time for friends so they figured grounding me wasn't exactly the best punishment. They decided to start charging me for bad grades or not being able to do some chores or simple stuff like that, nothing too major. I thought that it seemed a little unjust for taking my hard worked money from me because of course it only happens to me in my family because I work the most and everyone else has more time for being grounded.

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40hrs and school, of course your study time is going to be effected. must suck going to class, then work, and be expected to do chores. only plus side is you will be prepared for life when you get your own place. keep you head up.


Vanessa_Leeann26 17

I don't see why they shouldn't. Maybe they're trying to teach op how to be an adult. My son's first grade class has this type of system, but with fake money. They have a set of rules the class agreed upon, spending on the rule they broke or the good deed they did, they earn or pay out anywhere from 1-10¢. I personally like this idea.

Vanessa_Leeann26 17

Oops, my phone autocorrected depending to spending

I agree with 1. Doing something like that could cause A LOT of resentment towards you as a parent, which could potentially damage your relationship.

Yeah #28 that might work for first graders, who are required to go to school, but OP is spending his own time working and deserves to keep everything he earns.

28, the thing is, it's his money. The parent has 0 right to it.

The parent has a right to it if they decide to start charging rent

I like how everyone on this site is an expert on relationships. ?

rockbandaddict85 22

pretty much if he is under 18 and living under his parents roof then they can do it. I can see both sides to this, good and bad. resentment could be caused, yes, but it will make him think twice too especially if grounding or other forms of punishment haven't been successful in the past. the only way resentment could possibly be spared from this situation would be if they set aside the hard earned money they took for Said punishment into savings acct in op's name. I would be pissed if my parents did that to me growing up unless I knew it was going into savings for me for later on down the road (for apartment, rent, bills, college etc) then I wouldn't be resentful bc it's still my money, just unattainable at that time.

From age 15 to 16 my father took half my paychecks. Age 17 he took everything except the bonuses I got once in a while. Yes it causes resentment, and a ton of it at that.

Let's put a different perspective on this... Your bank account is like your prostate... Every now and again you may need a specialist to take a look at it and tell you if you're good or not. But personally, I do NOT appreciate someone just sticking their hand up there and pulling shit out, because they think it's necessary! At least the government has the courtesy to notify you and make you give them the money, they don't just stick their hand up your bank account and take money and leave you feeling like you got ****** over, they make you do it yourself! The OP's parents shouldn't just take the money out because they think they are justified in what they're doing...

From the time I was 16-18 my parents would take my hard earned money out of my bank account. Finally when I turned 19, I changed all my accounts in to my own name and made sure there was no way for them to take money. Now I'm being charged $800 rent in my own home. I have been trying to move out but it is difficult because I have a pit bull mix . Anyways, moral to this is that parents taking money from their kids without a valid reason is not Ok, it causes a lot of resentment.

Vanessa_Leeann26 17

Sorry, but I still don't agree that the parents have no rights. I willingly gave my parents half my check when I got a job at 16. Kids these days are so selfish.

If you work for it, it's yours. Willingly giving your parents money and having them take it from you are two different things.

For everyone who says their parents don't have the right to take a lil amount of their kids hard earned money in order to teach him/her a lesson or whatever they think is best for him/her, what if his/her parents said the same "you don't have the right to ask for my hard earned money everytime you wish'' when he/she asked for money to go party and waste it on something useless all the time?.. Then your advice will be go complaint to social services or run away.. There's no winning for the parents..

What is it truly teaching the kid? That they can't have what they truly worked for? I get it, the parent doesn't want their hard earned money being spent on random useless crap so they tell the kid no. But there are so many better ways to punish a teenager.

Like I said parents know what's best for their "own" kid than a bunch of people in the internet they raised their kid for 15-18 years not any of us , so it's not right for us to encourage him/her in any way to go against their parents, plus being strict a lil won't do any harm it's thousand times better than being in that TV series called 'Maury' with your own you said there are other ways but his/her parents seems confident that he'll/she'll listen to them and obey them without forgetting that those 2 people are his/her well wishers no matter what.. I might get thumbs down but that's how it suppose to work parents who cut alot of slack end up being neglected or worse by their own kids when they grow up, not all the kids but most or loose control over their own teenage kid until it's too late to make things right like in that tv series..

Did you even consider while he earned it it probably the only way to get him to change had behavior that op know is wrong but doesn't care with and other punishment? Op lives with his parents and bills are probably threw the parents plus a place to live, what about basic and maybe extra foods. Who feeds the family? Parents are responsible till 18 but crying about A punishment because he screwed up and is low.

FHL but I don't see any wrong in it Even though he is not willing to give the money His parents might not be willing to give him their money when he wanted to buy stuff when his younger either. If he can take this as a form of paying back to his parents I don't see the problem in this If he can't, he seems a little immature in my opinion Of course, unless they are taking a large sum of money then that is another problem

You have no right to charge a child under 18 rent. Its technically illegal in the United States. As a parent you must provide basic support (bed, clothes, food, shelter and an education) without charge to your children until they are legal adults. You can charge them or kick them out on their birthday without legal recourse but itd make you an asshole

You're clearly a teenager. Start paying rent and buying groceries then you can complain about being treated like a child in your parents home.

#102 and #134 It does not matter if his/her parents gave him/her money as a child or even now, he earned and worked for his/her money. I am sure when the parents were his/her age their parents gave them money when they needed it. Money is not just some sort of sentimental object or emotion, Money is something that is earned and having that taken from you unwillingly is just not right. He/she earned that money on their own. Lets say you won the lottery, would you be happy for your parents to take back all the money they spent on you? Are they gonna give their parents the money their parents spent on them? No they won't, so why should you? If you yourself are happy to give your parents your money that is fine, but giving and being taken from are 2 completely different things.

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Its theft, not paying a fine. Grounding the OP is one thing, stealing their money is just wrong.

if you do something wrong and get caught, go to court, pay a fine or do a few days in county jail. which would you choose.

Personally? County jail. The government takes enough of my money in taxes. What's a free vacation in a fine correctional facility! I guess it's not free though... Part of my taxes go to that also....

2- it's a bad idea. OP earned this money himself so they have no right to take it. If he was still getting an allowance from them and they were the ones giving him money then they would be justified in doing something like this.

Because being in jail, with criminals who could rape you, hurt you, and then that little time spent in jail would be on your record making it a bit hard to get jobs.

Talking about County jail here, not prison. County jail is wayyyy better than prison.

just thought you should know. county jail isn't free. you do have to pay them while you're there. same for prison.

And a curse jar, having replace something a kid breaks or disastrous? My daughter threw my phone because she got mad, making her pay wasn't theft. No kid I know of wanted treats or do/joking things that didn't need money from parents. Normally got it.

Op messed up, this is how to teach him not to again. They didn't take all and a lot don't care if grounded and do it again. Op lives with his parents. He don't pay the bills or house hold needs. So his parents spend on him, he works, he's old enough to know wrong and I bet been told not to befor.

#122 Op may be living with his Parents and not paying the bills and so forth, but that is their job as a parent. What you're basically saying is that OPs parents weren't expecting to have to spend money on their child that they willingly had in the first place. It is just wrong to take money from your children. Especially when they have been working hard for their money and trying to kickstart their lives.

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Yeah, there's paying for your keep and then there's paying your parents to basically not lock you up in the house and take your phone/laptop away when you do something wrong ...I bet the OP would rather be grounded instead of giving HIS/HER hard earned cash to their parents for the most dumbest reason ever, who would probably spend that money on entirely on themselves...

PerditaDessa 38

If OP would rather be grounded than give up their money then giving up their money is the punishment that would work best. Punishments aren't something to subject to what one would rather do.

15 does that then justify capital punishment?

Yeah 15 that's very true, but what's taking his/her money away achieving though? They can still leave their house and hang with friends and still use their phone or whatever. The worst thing is they probably can't go to the cinema or get a KFC or something. Taking the money away is a pointless, selfish, ******** move. Nothing to do about being an adult at all, just parents trying to gain control the wrong/bad way...

SaharaZinc 14

15 has an excellent point. No one will learn without discipline.

askullnamedbilly 33

You're all forgetting that what OP's parents are doing is not actually up for discussion since it is ILLEGAL. Taking money from someone against their will is theft. It doesn't matter how you're related to them - if it's not your money, you have no right to take it from them. This is something that OP could go to the police for, not a legitimate parenting method. If you have to break the law to teach your child a lesson, you're doing it wrong.

I like the idea. maybe if op stopped getting in trouble they wouldn't have to worry about either punishment

63 OP more than likely shares a joint bank account with their parent(s). In such a case it is legal to take their money from the account.

Yes it does, if you would rather not be killed by lethal dose, you might think twice about what you are doing, and if you got caught doing one of those type of crimes then you deserve to die.

#74, not saying the parents don't have a joint account, and I don't know OP's age, but depending on what bank you go to, after you have a job you can get your own checking account no strings attached at age 17. I did this with Wells Fargo.

you_can_do_it 2

actually it is not theft if the OP is under 18. If over 18 the parents no longer own OP so it is rent and therefore no illegal. OP has 3 choices. stop behaving badly, deal with the punishment or live on his own and see what life is really about. For all those who believe the parents do not have a right to punish a disobediant troublemaker, you are what is wrong with society.

soragirlfriend 8

No, you are what is wrong with this society. Taking money from others is never okay.

The government takes money from people without their permision. Its called being made to be responsible for their actions.The parents are fining op for broken rules. As long as the rules were made obvious to op this is acceptable. If op doesnt agree he can take.his paycheck and rent an apartment.

Vanessa_Leeann26 17

I totally agree 95.. I feel sorry for the world my kids will have to live in with all these entitled brats these days. I can't imagine what it's going to be like when they're all adults. Smh.

Ok 103 so every time they bought op the clothes he wanted or any, shoes, school supplies, paid for field trips or the fees for sports or classes he wanted extra. Food he requested or treats? Pets if he had any which needs food and so on. I'm sure computers or game systems. Toys. Treats, got a job cars or help with gas. Insurance is cheaper usually in a multi car plan. Hey having a place to live. Bills. Showers and laundry. Living isn't free. So yes let's talk about how wrong it was to lose some instead of grounding. Op screwed up and this probably made him think better of trying it next Time.

Also 103 what's wrong with society is kids thinks they are Entitled, and have no respect.

Ok #119, I totally remember the part of being a parent where your children have forced you into buying stuff for them. Most money that is spent on a child is what you should expect as a parent, you willingly chose to have a child and you must accept all responsibilities as a parent. If you think taking money from your child as they are trying to start their own life is okay, then you really need to open your eyes and realize how horrible you are as a parent. And a child/teenager are not selfish for wanting to keep the money THEY earned.

Unless they're super unreasonable, can't you just be good + then they won't take any?

PerditaDessa 38

Bet you'll learn your lessons a lot quicker this way.

If they're stealing op's money it's most likely for personal gain and not for a punishment

I agree. If they gave him the money ok, but he worked for it himself. Even though they are his parents, they have no right to take the money he worked for.

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Vanessa_Leeann26 17

I totally agree Ichiya. You don't like it? Follow the rules and keep your hard earned cash. They're system works because it teaches their kid how life works. If OP gets a traffic ticket, there will be a fine to pay. Suck it up buttercup, that's how the world works. You mess up, you pay for it with your hard earned cash.

askullnamedbilly 33

OP's parents' house rules do NOT stand above the law, however. Taking their kid's money (not their allowance but actual money they earned doing a legitimate job) is theft. It would be theft if OP took money out of their parents' wallet, and it's just as illegal for the parents to take money out of OP's - since it IS actually OP's money and not money they gave them in the first place.

So all those fines I've gotten for speeding is actually the government stealing my money?I should sue the government for that, sound logic right there...

House rules agreed upon by those living there are just as legally binging as a lease agreement. If op was told that from now on when they broke certain rules there would be so much of a penalty and he stayed that is consent. If He did not agree all he had to do was move. If he is a minor then i find that taking a childs money is not the same as taking money from someone who is old enough to get a job. when they are that old they should understand right and wrong. If they still choose to do the wrong thing especially if it costs the parents time or money they should be able to fine the child. Nothing huge like $100+ but small amounts like 5 or 10 to show that as an adult they must pay for their actions. It would be ideal to keep a tab and return money for each good choice op made though.

They could also be taking it, but putting it aside for part of a college fund without OP knowing. This way, everyone wins...

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Maybe there way of saying you're paying rent. Once I got a job I had to sign a contract saying that im going to pay them weekly.

askullnamedbilly 33

Signing a contract and agreeing to pay money is perfectly legal. Taking it against someone's will, however, is still theft - even if the thieves are your parents.

I don't see how they are taking it against his will though. Either they have a shared bank account, so his parents would have legal access to his money, or, he has begrudgingly accepted their rule and is giving it to them. Unless he keeps all his money in cash in his room somewhere and they steal it while he's gone, I doubt he has a strong legal case.

Sure personal gain they are using it to punish op for breaking rules. May be only way to get it to sink in.They are not taking it for no reason, or all. He has shelter And food, taken care of and bills are not free. He dont like being punished movie out. Let's see how your hard earned mom goes for rent , bills, food. Along with everything else u need

90- if OP is under 18 he probably can't have a account purely in his name, one of his parents would have to have their name on it in order to open.

Depends on what you did and how much they are taking...

I hope they're not both lacking in funds and integrity... "Hey! Are you giving me the stink eye! So disrespectful!" "What? No I'm--" "That'll be $20."

mvc3ftw 17

Talking back? That's another 50! Sighing in disapproval? 100 dollars you ungrateful child! now, if you'll excuse me,i'm going to go gamble with my 170$