Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I introduced my dad to my boyfriend. I gave my dad the middle finger and he thumped me on the head, as we've been playfully doing for years. My boyfriend got all mad and tried to fight my dad. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML
Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML
Today, my parents met my boyfriend, and to say it went badly is an understatement. My mom went outside to relax by chain smoking and the shouting, and the screaming only ended when my dad took my boyfriend by the scruff of the neck and threw him out the front door into the street. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, my dad walked into my school and joked around saying that he's going to shoot my boyfriend. We all laughed. Except my boyfriend. He was sobbing in a corner. FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, my boyfriend went to ask my dad for my hand in marriage. All I could make out from the door was mumbling, until profanities started flying. My boyfriend shouted "well she's a SINGLE bitch now!" and stormed out of the house. My dad still refuses to tell me what happened in there. FML
Today, my parents met my boyfriend for the first time. They spent the entire meal trying to convince him to dump me, all while I was sitting right next to him. FML
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Top comments
sjb_2015 20
All these FMLs give me good ideas for what to do when my future kids start dating.
Kyuzomi 12
Calm down satan.
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Comments (128)
Rickman18 1
O.O how
lsg3000 6
Your boyfriend shouldn't even have given your dad the satisfaction!
murdersquirrel 15
it's really disturbing that so many people are dissing OP's boyfriend about being brought to tears. the stigma about men crying sucks. it's a normal part of life, it happens, and if you can't cry, you're probably dead inside. people feel feelings, why is that not ok? it is heartbreaking as **** when men cry, I admit, but there's no reason for the judgement. idiots.
foxy_grampa 19
I'm going to be so disappointed if this doesn't get followed up on because I really want to know what was said that was that bad
seth7_ 22
Sounds like a great guy...
Puma68224 7
well you'll always be daddy's little princess, he's just making sure your dating Prince charming and not princess charming
bookie1981 7
Did she say it was yours?
bayliebug 14
Why would anyone do that to someone ): this makes me sad...
coletebou 7
Sorry op. Fyl
Axel5238 29
I understand parents wanting to protect their kids, but stuff like this generally back fires. The parents make it so difficult for the daughter to date someone they end up acting out and doing much worse than they would have normally. I'm sorry OP, hopefully your dad loosens up a bit.