Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I introduced my dad to my boyfriend. I gave my dad the middle finger and he thumped me on the head, as we've been playfully doing for years. My boyfriend got all mad and tried to fight my dad. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML
Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML
Today, my parents met my boyfriend, and to say it went badly is an understatement. My mom went outside to relax by chain smoking and the shouting, and the screaming only ended when my dad took my boyfriend by the scruff of the neck and threw him out the front door into the street. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, my dad walked into my school and joked around saying that he's going to shoot my boyfriend. We all laughed. Except my boyfriend. He was sobbing in a corner. FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, my boyfriend went to ask my dad for my hand in marriage. All I could make out from the door was mumbling, until profanities started flying. My boyfriend shouted "well she's a SINGLE bitch now!" and stormed out of the house. My dad still refuses to tell me what happened in there. FML
Today, my parents met my boyfriend for the first time. They spent the entire meal trying to convince him to dump me, all while I was sitting right next to him. FML
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Top comments
sjb_2015 20
All these FMLs give me good ideas for what to do when my future kids start dating.
Kyuzomi 12
Calm down satan.
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Comments (128)
Nicostream 16
I think there are better ways for finding out about the manliness of your daughter's boyfriend than busting his balls. Still, I'd find it hard to imagine to get so sad that I start crying if my girlfriend's dad did this.
WD_Stevens 22
Verbally severed his balls? Must have been one hell of a spell
CptInFl 1
Does anyone know what the dad said?
commandercolbert 6
what did he say that made your dad so hostile??
BatGirl0249 3
How rude of your father!
Xotoolyxo 16
Your dad must be very intimidating
WeepingSilence 3
I had to re read this until I saw the word, "Verbally."
Duskitty 14
I don't even at all these stupid sexist people here calling OP's boyfriend a wuss. Words can and do hurt quite a lot, and he's not a 'weakling' for showing emotions. I'm sorry, OP. Tell your dad to stop being a douchecanoe for no good reason, and that it is not okay to do this 'just for fun'.
funturtle23 6
I want to be like your dad when I grow up.
IXChaosDragonXI 13
My stepfather tried to do that to my new boyfriend. My boyfriend verbally shut him up without muttering a single curse. I'm in love.