By Anonymous - 19/05/2012 23:20 - Sri Lanka - Piliyandala

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said it was because my mom's lazy eye creeps him out, and that my dad hates him. She doesn't have a lazy eye, he's never met my dad, never seen my mom, and now according to his friends, he's been cheating on me for the past two weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 012
You deserved it 2 536

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Top comments

He's just making excuses to break up with you. You're better off without him OP.

I don't understand, did he not at least try to come up with an ACTUAL reason to dump you? At least you don't have to deal with that douche anymore

Comments

He's just making excuses to break up with you. You're better off without him OP.

_ebbonyy 11

Especially if he's shallow enough to list 'your mums lazy eye' as a fair reason to break up.

Trisha_aus 15

Are blokes getting dumber by the day or is it just me? What does her mom's eye have to do with their relationship?! utter fuckclump

Fuckclump, that made my day :)

pinkWabbits 0

It was for the better OP. Not only did he give lame excuses but he couldn't even do that right. I think you dodged a bullet with this one.

Eh.. This calls for a back-hand bitch slap

You deserve better OP. Cheating bfs arnt worth keeping around especially if they dnt feel bad about cheating.

TwiztedYuri 9

there are those hit it and quit it duchefucks in this world. they will do anything to get laid then when they're done playing with you they move on to the next one. I was friends with one of those a while ago.

GovernorGeneral 8

Shit i accidently started reading this as ' today, my mom broke up with me' ._.

Llamacod 11

taco, its "aren't" and "don't" is it really that hard to put in the 1 extra letter in each word?

GirlOnFire143 6

Llama, is it really that hard to put an apostrophe between the "it" and the "s" in "it's"? If you're going to be a spelling nazi, at the very least spell words right in your own comments.

My bad. I was never good in english class.

GovernorGeneral 8

How do you bend tacos? Oh master, please teach me.

Ummm ok I guess. Get tortillas y carne asada.

Then you add the secret formula. This secret formula to the tacos is.....

Girlybanana 2

Maybe he has met your mom. Maybe that's who he's cheating on you with. That would explain why your dad hates him.

starman02 12

#100- good theory! My theory is he is probably just a douche bag :)

I don't understand, did he not at least try to come up with an ACTUAL reason to dump you? At least you don't have to deal with that douche anymore

Idk. But after each line, my mouth dropped that much more. Then I was like huh?

sonrisapreciosa 6

Maybe he thought she was the other girl? O.o

Good riddance. He did all the work for you. On to the next one.

DontClickOnMe 28

Well obviously he was just making up those things as excuses. Oh well, you deserve better than him anyway if he can't tell you the real reason why he's breaking up with you.

Dude I clicked, your pic is scary as hell man!!

Wizardly01 6

To me, when I saw his photo, I was just like, "Meh".

GirlOnFire143 6

I was like, O.O Made my day.

How can I get a girlfriend?

1) Get drunk. 2) Strip naked. 3) Film yourself doing the Mambo in front of a Perdix tribute poster. 4) Post a link to the video in your profile. 5) Receive girlfriend (or hate mail). You are welcome.

Ugh, why can't you thumb up FML team comments??!!

Trisha_aus 15

Oh lord! How I wish I can thumbs up sirin's comment

You could man the fuck up and ask a chick out?

19 - They're FML Mods. They already know they're tha shit. Lol

flockz 19

1. go to a public place and find beautiful and desirable women. 2. tell them everything you want to do nasty, sexual things with them (my two girlfriends right now loved it) 3. line your bedroom with rose petals. 4. shut the plantation blinds. 5. oil em up. make the skin soft and silky. 6. shove your rod into one and switch to the other when you get tired. 7. scream their name as you cream onto your racecar sheets. JILL!!! JILL!!! best part is they'll never leave you again and neither one is jealous of the other. and they'll even wipe your ass if you want them to! best. threesome. ever.

debbster7 18

There is just so much wrong with your comment, 52... It's a blasphemy.

flockz 19

thanks :) you sound like a fun person.

GirlOnFire143 6

Two girlfriends, eh? Classsay. (hope you got that hint of sarcasm)

Well if his right hands called Jill he might be telling the truth.

GirlOnFire143 6

ROFL, taco_bender... :P

Lol #52 What in the fuck did i just read

ss_20_xx 14

52, are you sure you're talking about actual girls or those real-life $10000 dolls?

Screw a girlfriend, where can I get a Perdix tribute poster?

WitchyArmyWife00 0

Get naked Pour a bucket of glitter all over yourself Stand in the sunshine and the girls will come running

Devin91 20

52 that's creepy

Cause they no like us! :...(

Devin91 20

He's a dick, you can do better then that he's not worth it if he can't be a man and tell you the truth and how he's really feeling.

Trisha_aus 15

You are missing a head, sir

Devin91 20

At number 24: read my profile and you'll understand why.

This is FML, not a dating site.

challan 19

But 49... I'm attracted to your pink fuzzy skin, and FML stands for Future My Lovers

bizarre_ftw 21

*future made-up lovers/future MMS lovers Or, if you choose to meet up with them, what 54 said/rape

Devin, where's your shirt?!?! I'll help you find it!!

taylorrbaby333 6

Tool.

mhopper 13

Am I the only girl enjoying the ridges and grooves of his eight pack? ^_^

MyChemicalSmosh 4

#112 Probably, I prefer cute cuddly boys, meaning, still has a bit of baby fat even at 14.

challan 19

112 of course not, I'm just assuming he's gay.

I got the best kind of abs... FLABS I'm sexy and i know it

Devin91 20

128 thanks for assuming but I'm not gay.

Yeah, he probably mixed between you and some other girl he "knows" ( apparently, he "knows" a lot of girls ) You're absolutely better without him, OP.

CaramelMacchiato 13

Exactly! :) That's why he's her EX; because he's an EXample of who you shouldn't date.

No top comment? Heres my chance... Hello

Ouch. That sucks bro...

Trisha_aus 15

No shit, bro

dcg1375 7

Seriously, bro

13- you mad bro?

Bra** she is a girl

you people have issues.

Trisha_aus 15

And you still want to be with this bloke? Dump him, find yourself a gentleman

Well she cant really dump him because he kind of beat her to it

Find a gentleman? In this day and age? You're dreamin'.

Actually, you can find a gentleman; but only if you yourself are a lady.

Not where I'm from!

Trisha_aus 15

Where are you from? And don't say the usual - America, where you can only find McCrap munchers...I'm sure there are lovely blokes..you just have to find one, that will take time and a few heartbreaks and you may find yourself eating ice cream and, listening to Adele but you'll get there..good luck

mhopper 13

Gothicangel17, was that last FML about the baby/fart you?! :)

113, most the men in QLD a far from gentlemanly. I'm engaged, but my fiancé is far from being a gentleman, just like most other males I've met who aren't older.

Trisha_aus 15

118- move to Victoria!

But it's coooooold there D: