Today, less than a week after moving in together, I decided to clean out my husband's messy room. In the process, I found a jar containing what appears to be a toenail collection. I don't think I'll ever regain my appetite. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML
Today, I noticed that the floor outside our bathroom was covered in toenail clippings. I asked my husband what had happened. Turns out, he saves time by clipping his nails onto the floor and then sweeping them out into the hall, where they get lodged in the carpet. FML
Today, I found one of my roommate's giant yellow toenail clippings on the counter next to the kitchen sink. When I confronted him about it, he told me the cat must have carried it out of his bedroom and put it there. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me how he used to collect little things when he was younger. He then decided to tell me about his current big toe nail collection. FML
Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML
Today, I watched my husband pick his dead foot skin and say, "That's a keeper!" before putting it in his mouth. FML
Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML
Today, I was walking in my apartment when I felt something stab my foot. Thinking it was a piece of glass, I looked down. It was one of my roommate's toenail clippings. FML
Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML
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Top comments
Senseless_487 29
He really should have toed you about that.
mea_iloveskiing 26
At least you didn't find another woman's underwear :)
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Comments (116)
beautifulsoul89 11
Ugh I swear men and their toenails! I understand somewhat of that feeling. My husband clips his nails wherever he thinks is okay, kitchen counter, the living room, and our bed. I snap at him every time. So be thankful the clippings are in one spot and not all over your house!
Enslaved 36
Haha I have the same problem. Vacuuming is like a game of hide & seek!
lulzcoaster 3
i displays them online for all to see, i praise anon for collecting them
Axipiter 24
PLEASE tell me you also found a few yards of string, because he was planning on making "friendship necklaces" with them. I make "friendship necklaces" from my toenails for all my friends... I don't have many friends...
YooperTransplant 8
Perhaps he's planning on building a ship to escape the underworld.
kenleybunch 15
Whoa... I wonder how big the jar would have to be if you collected them for 10+ years :-O
annalily5 28
And this is why you should live with a person before marrying them.
smokecloud_ 37
Way to be judgemental. I personally agree that it's often beneficial to live together, have sex, and such before marriage but I sure wouldn't knock someone with beliefs different from mine. Furthermore, he still could've hidden his odd collection even if they did live together before. Say OP, you didn't find the condom from your first time together in there too, did you?
Makayla18_18 13
Why do you have separate rooms anyway?
Simbaby 23
Maybe have a talk with him ?
iceboy2020 5
Ummmmmm it's your husband y'all just moved in together and y'all have separate rooms
catella_fml 12
Could be worse... at least you didn't find out he was cheating