By Anonymous - 04/10/2012 15:17 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I yet again had to explain to my boyfriend that, yes, I can get pregnant even if I don't actually have an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 012
You deserved it 4 227

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unknown_user5566 26

I could be reading this wrong, but are you saying your boyfriend doesn't make you ******? If so, definitely FYL.

I'm sure you did 41, I'm sure you did.


Is your boyfriend Todd Akin?

Oh the mysteries of the female ****** hahaha guys can be so clueless

First comment and only five people so far have understood it. *sigh* Woe is me.

chell1894 13


unknown_user5566 26

I just Googled him, and there was something about how he believes women who are raped can avoid getting pregnant... Is that what you were referencing? Regardless, if that's what he believes, he's an asshole AND an idiot. Wtf?

Yes, it was, and your analysis of his character and intelligence is universally accepted, so much so that the Republican Party has actually pulled their funding for his campaign, which is for a senate seat they need to take the majority in the senate. Good move on their part. The last thing they need is a guy like that in their party, and he doesn't belong there in the first place. Him winning that election would be way more damaging to the Republican party than losing that seat. Not that he had any chance of winning after that comment anyway.

unknown_user5566 26

I'm glad they pulled his funding. I'm not one to dabble in politics, but a comment like that is definitely enough to make me register to vote, just for the purpose of voting against him.

chell1894 13

I'm also pretty sure I read Tom Adkins said women bring rape upon theirselves because of how they dress and act. Or something similar to that.

chell1894 13

Todd Akin sorry iPhone autocorrect

It's my opinion that it is every citizen's duty to pay attention to politics, understand history, and participate in every election. Kleeklay, you should definitely register to vote, but not just to vote against Akin. I understand that you are in the education profession, which is an area in which the government has great influence. You should watch last night's presidential debate. You may find it quite enlightening. I know it certainly clarified many things for me. Also, the cutoff to vote in the upcoming election is coming up very soon, so you should hurry if you want to vote in the presidential election!

unknown_user5566 26

Gracehi, education is the one reason that I'm tempted to become more involved, definitely. I actually had a coworker tell me to watch those debates today. I guess I'm turned off by politics (at least on a national level) because it's the cause of so much anger and fighting between different parties. I will probably start small, and get my toes wet with following local (Arizona) politics and go from there.

Zoh_Aubrey 8

Akin also said that abortionist are performing abortions on women who aren't pregnant. Exactly.

Gracehi, I read a few days ago that Akin is still leading the polls (albeit not by much) even after his "legitimate rape" comment...

110, If that's true, I find it very surprising. In any case, a politician can lead in the polls and then lose the election. It really all depends on voter turnout.

For clarity, Akin's main point was that women can't get pregnant from "legitimate rape", implying that women who get pregnant from rape secretly wanted it. Obviously, that's ridiculous and offensive (especially to rape victims). Akin is a ********.

Re Akin: It gets worse: The Republicans (some) and their SuperPacs are endorsing and funding him again, since his numbers are back up. He's also said the law shouldn't prevent women from being paid less than men, if that's what an employer wants to do.

Yeah, he's a big time victim blamer. If a woman gets raped, he says, she brought it on herself by acting provocative.

141: That's not fair, obviously, but it's also not even good economics. Underpaying women compared to men just gives 51% of the population (females) less incentive to be economically productive. Imagine trying to run a race wearing one lead boot, because that's like how this policy would affect the American economy.

chell1894 13

I hope Akins gets raped so hard he bleeds to death out of his butthole. Then we can all just tell him that he must have been dressed to provocatively. He seriously can't win. He's a disgusting pig.

LO388 7

And Akin is on the House (or Senate?) SCIENCE committee. How scary is that?!

141 & 147, Akin isn't the only politician who feels that way about the "Equal Pay Act," and Obama's recent amendment to the Act extending the allowable time to sue for unequal pay. It's a commonly held conservative position, and can't be equated with Akin's stunningly stupid and offensive "legitimate rape" comment. The rationale behind that position isn't necessarily sexism, but because pay differences between genders isn't always because of discrimination, and because it may have some unintended negative affects on businesses and the economy. In some cases differences in pay is because women work fewer hours to care for their children and their pay reflects that. On the same note, some argue that childless women actually earn more on average for the same job than their male counterparts, and the legislation is therefore unnecessary. Some also fear that the "Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act," which allows women greater flexibility in sueing for pay discrimination, may lead to frivolous law suits which will cost companies a great deal and have a negative affect on the economy. Others also assert that when government steps in to make things "fair," it can backfire, such as in some cases with affirmative action. For example, young women outperform men by a wide margin in high school yet their acceptance into college is equel. Why? Because affirmative action allows colleges to manipulate their acceptance standards for different groups so that acceptance among those groups is equal. In this case, they lower their acceptance standards for men, while raising them for women. On the other hand, without affirmative action, there may be far fewer college educated black people. Similarly, on the one hand, the "Equal Pay Act" and "Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act" may put a burden on businesses, while on the other hand it may prevent women from being underpaid. I'm not trying to sway anyone's opinion on the "Equal Pay Act" or affirmative action, as I'm not sure how I feel about them myself. I'm just saying there are two sides to every issue, and often when one side seems prejudice or discriminatory, it's not necessarily the case.


I'm not American, but I've heard about the equal pay act. Does it only apply to women? Can men being paid less benefit? I don't support any sexist laws, so if it doesn't go both ways I think it's terrible, but if it does, does it apply to ****? Women in **** typically make an order of magnitude more than men, will male **** stars need to be paid as much as female **** stars under the act? I don't like the idea though. If women are really paid less but are equally as productive, couldn't a company use this to make money? Let's say women are paid X and men Y (Y > X). A company could hire only women, paying them X+(Y-X)/2. They would have the same gross income as other companies, but their salary expenses would be lower. That company would pay better and make more profit! And women are a huge group, so it isn't like this wouldn't be possible. I think salaries are too complicated to have the government trying to regulate them at that kind of level. I agree with "no one should be paid less than X", but saying that one individual has to be paid as much as another is crazy. If women are actually being underpaid I think the solution is for savvy businesses to take the route I described above. Eventually other companies would lose their female employees and would need to pay more to keep them. In a free market if you're not paying a fair price someone will take advantage of that and run you out of business. On topic: Women can get pregnant from sperm. Rape, consensual, ******, no ******. Although I've heard orgasms can improve the probability. Sometimes I wonder where people get their ideas from.

unknown_user5566 26

I could be reading this wrong, but are you saying your boyfriend doesn't make you ******? If so, definitely FYL.

Maybe he makes sure he doesn't give her an ****** in fear of getting her prego. Send this guy back to SexEd.

Someone missed one too many health classes.

Someone missed all of the sex Ed classes.

Maybe OP just doesnt come every time they do it :) I dont always need to have an ****** to have great sex ;)

My girlfriend's ex never got her to ******. I got her there on my first time.

LiterOfCola 16

Yuck 41, no one gives a shit

I'm sure you did 41, I'm sure you did.

Believe what you will

45- you mean to tell me his spiky collar doesn't get you off? :o

Posthuman: Whether or not you did (and I seriously doubt it, because the majority of guys that have wouldn't feel the need to post it online as an ego boost), nobody gives a ****. Keep it to yourself.

48 - it's the black lipstick and frail body that generally leaves most women sopping wet

52-Frail body. Funny. I'm glad to know there is someone who tells people about their flaws. By the way, did you notice you had words hovering above your head?

unknown_user5566 26

35- I fully believe that you can have an enjoyable experience without having an ******, but without an ******, I think it qualifies more as "great foreplay" and not "great sex".

Definitely sounds like she needs to find another man to satisfy her needs. But hey she may over look his little flaw.

unknown_user5566 26

61- Communication about the issue is step #1. I've found that lackluster love lives are often just the symptom of poor communication between partners.

"I fully believe that you can have an enjoyable experience without having an ******, but without an ******, I think it qualifies more as "great foreplay" and not "great sex"." Wut? So if you have great willy-in-vajayay-but-without-****** sex, it qualifies more as foreplay? What a strange idea. I like orgasms, but great sex does not desperately need one.

unknown_user5566 26

69- That was just my opinion, so you are welcome to disagree. My personal definition of sex includes an ******, be it traditional penetration, oral, or otherwise. Anything else that does not include ****** falls under the umbrella of "foreplay". Again, that's just my view on the matter.

TheDrifter 23

I'm with 71, if there are no orgasms involved, it's coitus interruptus at best and might as well be foreplay. Sure, there may have been penetration, but you're no father ahead than if you were dry humping.

chell1894 13

So much talk about sex

81- Well, this IS the Internet..

unknown_user5566 26

Drifter- Yeah, pretty much. Of course I still technically view it as sex, just not "great" sex. Foreplay is considered the precursor to orgasmic sex (at least to me), and *traditionally* does not produce ******, since it's not the end point of the sexual activity. So in my mind, any sexual activity that does not yield an ****** is just a "warm up", and you should keep going until the ultimate goal of climaxing is reached.

He's stupid

Ahahah she probably faked it!

Sorry that last comment was directed at 41. It would not let me edit it for some reason.

lacespace 8

I'm so sick of everyone picking on post human. YES he dresses differently than you do or prefer. It's ******* SHOCKING. It must be brought up every time he posts! If he makes a dumb comment by all means tell him, but for ***** sake get off the bully bandwagon over the Internet it makes you look like an all around pussy who has nowhere else to let off steam.

LiterOfCola 16

I honest to god thought posthuman was a lesbian. That's obviously not why I said yuck before (I just didn't want to hear that personal info), but damn.

Ya um this post human's pic is just gross. People tend to comment on gross things, hence the insults. I don't know how anyone could find that shit attractive and good luck finding a job like that.

lacespace 8

Most likely I'll get thumbed down for my comments but I don't care. All jokes aside it's just ugly the way people actually attack others on the Internet. I know he said an icky comment, but every thread I see him in regardless someone is making jokes about his looks, this thread was probably the nicest.Im a huge joker myself I love mocking dumbness, but this shit is just bullying. I can't even make a smartass comment on the actual FML because I'm so irked by peoples shit head thought processes.. Like the person above me. I really wonder what kind of life you lead, what type of person you are, to put someone down like that. I'm glad I don't have to know someone like you.

unknown_user5566 26

Lacespace- You go, girl. I totally agree. There is a fine line between poking fun, and being downright mean.

SApprentice 34

116- I agree with 118, thank you. What I'm seeing in the comments above is just awful. It is bullying.

111&116, majority of people judge by appearance. However it's wrong it happens. He is probably and unfortunately used it. Saying this majority of the people that dress like him, seek this kind of attention they want to stand out. However not saying it in his case, but most teenagers and young adult do this to rebel against governments, schools, rule, parents and etc. I personally know people that dress like this and listen to his music, have very good jobs. You can dress differently you know take out the earring and what not. Then on their off hours they dress like that. Just because they dress like that and sometimes act odd are some are very smart. The kid in my high school was gothic and graduate top of the class.

CallMeMcFeelii 13

I know I'll probably get thumbed down for this but..shouldn't he of thought this type of ridicule would happen when he decided to put that picture up? I don't condone bullying just stating that this kid should have saw this coming. It shouldn't happen but this is the Internet. It ain't full of hippies and flowers, more like dickheads and assholes.

The Internet isn't kind. Put something up that's different and everyone jumps on you. Same as in real life actually. Just it isn't to faces in real life. People don't have balls so they say it to people's faces online, but in person, snickers behind back.

124: Blaming the victim isn't a very good policy.

41- Why would anyone share that with everyone? Keep that between you and your girl.

If you are seriously gonna call this kinda stuff bullying then you need to get over yourself and realize what real bullying is. This is the Internet and if your gonna put a pic of yourself on such a public forum like Fml then you and everyone else need to expect it to be criticized. Stop making such a big deal out of nothing. He probably likes the attention. And I'm actually a pretty damn nice person irl.

SApprentice 34

135- In my experience, people that like to say that they're 'actually pretty damn nice' are not usually all that nice. If what you say is true, then that pleasant personality should spill over online. The fact that you need an outlet to be a dick to people leads me to believe that you're probably not very nice at all.

Nah it's because people act like dickheads on the intrawebz generally but usually face to face with someone wouldn't even think about talking shit. That was not a jab at anyone personally it was a generalization, and a true one at that.

Chaosaiyan 6

And that lipstick! Maybe that's what I need to get girls... If that's the case I'll remain single thank you very much.

Trix_Disorder 20

KyleeKay - I find a lot of the things you say very interesting. Are you saying that women who can't ****** until their sexual peak (30 years or older) are never having good sex/have bad communication with their partners? I know you were making a sweeping generalization based on your experiences and opinion, but... You shouldn't. It's making you look ignorant, even though you seem like a very sex-positive person.

unknown_user5566 26

140- If you felt I was making sweeping generalizations, then my points did not come off as intended. I thought I had made it clear that those definitions were ones that I use in my own life, not definitions that I expect others to accept. Regarding the "poor communication", I said I often find that to be the root of poor sex lives, but it's certainly not the rule. I recognize that everyone is different when it comes to sex.

135: You're right when you say that we all need to be tough enough to handle some criticism, but you missed the other half of that: we all need to take responsibility for our actions, and that includes not picking on some guy for dressing like Marilyn Manson. You don't like it? Don't look at it.

I apologize for being rude. However, no matter WHAT his picture had been, he should have expected insults for posting the comment he did. It's just what happens. If his picture had been the most gorgeous man on earth, he still would have been insulted. His appearance is just the easiest thing for people to bring up.

7-Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant, and die.

118- why are you supporting laces pace when you were attacking me on the other post? You put me down just because you didn't get what I was saying.

SApprentice 34

161- Please stop bringing that up. I just saw you reference it again on an entirely different FML as well. You got burned by critical people, but no was being purposefully derogatory towards you. Just let it go, there's no need to spam all the other threads and FMLs with references towards it.

unknown_user5566 26

161- I didn't call you names, make fun of your appearance, or try to make you feel like a shitty person for being an individual. All I did was call your bluff because your comment, and the logic in the comment, didn't make sense. That doesn't mean that I was calling YOU stupid.

This has been an entertaining fight.

yeah, i just because I didn´t write something the way you thought I should you dismissed what I meant to say...

unknown_user5566 26

Dude... enough. There is no way you were talking about Todd Akins in that post. Let it go, seriously. You will not do well on this site if you throw a hissy fit every time you're not smothered with hugs in kisses.

unknown_user5566 26

and*, not in. Brain was moving faster than my fingers.

Is that what she told you..

Lol was going to comment on the post but the conversation has just gone way to far off corse haha

So missing the point.

Too bad. From the sounds of it you wouldn't have to worry about brith control if he was right.

borkchop1992 15

If that was the case our world would definately not survive.

Uh, speak for yourself.

thejewishfuhrer 17

Not that we need more idiots reproducing anyway....

unknown_user5566 26

11- No need to get offended... It's not like #4 said "if that was the case *and aj94w was the last male on earth* our world would definitely not survive".

4 and 11 - if people your age are pros at female orgasms, there wouldn't be such an incline in numbers if girls becoming lesbian, js. Incoming thumbs down for a good joke?:D

borkchop1992 15

Define a good joke

Urpoppy 21

I surely hope you don't breed with this idiot.

Apparently not only once but twice the way this reads.

He's not an idiot just pretends to be for an excuse for not bringing op to climax

No no no, the ****** allows the egg to open to allow the sperm to penetrate it. No ******, no pregnancy. What are they teaching in sex ed these days?

They're teaching 'Don't be silly, wrap your willy!' and shooting Trojan packs into the class with shirt cannons.

Tookie22 5

Always teaching new things. Love the blog and keep it up

The only thing I remember from my sex ed is the stack of nightmare inducing pictures of STDs. Oh god. Flashbacks.

Another stupid ass!

Then how come women who get raped get pregnant sometimes? Think about it.

Jazzyjazz - What exactly are you trying to say?

unknown_user5566 26

Doc- I think she's refuting your original comment by implying women who get raped don't ******, but yet they still get pregnant. Could be wrong, but that's how I interpreted it.

mollysticks 10

Well according to the movie Mean Girls, don't have sex, because you will get pregnant. And die. haha

I'm trying to say that women who get raped don't have orgasms but they still get pregnant sometimes. I wasn't trying to be mean.

Kylee - I interpreted it the same way, but I was hoping it was something else. Clearly Jazzy can't identify a joke even if it slapped her upside her head.

unknown_user5566 26

Ah, wishful thinking, Doc. Humor has turned into overly obvious jokes and stunts... few appreciate and understand the art of sarcasm anymore.

Or perhaps jazzy jazz is somehow trying to reference the idiocy of that one senate dude... Tom Akins? Wasn't he the "rape=no pregnancy" guy?

Why yes, yes he was.

Yeah that is exactly what I was doing.

unknown_user5566 26

102- I highly doubt that's exactly what you were doing. You took Doc's initial comment seriously, and you were trying to "prove him wrong". If you were actually trying to reference that idiotic politician, you would've, you know... referenced him.

SApprentice 34

86- Are you kidding me? I can't believe you just said that. You should realize women ****** during rape very often. It's not something we have a lot of control over. That is a big reason for the shame- if a woman's body enjoyed it, then they feel like they wanted it and that they shouldn't tell anyone. They become ashamed and feel like they did something wrong, that if their body hadn't responded to it then it wouldn't have happened. They don't want to go to court and have to listen their rapists describe in detail how much they enjoyed it. Your thinking is several decades behind. When under stimuli, the human body, male or female, can become sexually aroused to the point of ****** regardless of whether or not the person wants to. Do you have any idea what it's like for women, to desperately want it to stop, to make it go away, but feel themselves having an ******? That's one of the very things the rapists want, that's why it's so degrading. I don't care if you were joking or serious, or trying to make some round-about reference to Todd Akins, don't say shit like that.

#6, Careful, Doc. You might get an invitation from Rep. Todd Akin to be his aide on the science committee of the US House of Representatives.

LiterOfCola 16

I'm almost positive that jazzy jazz is just new and doesn't know about DocBastard yet, which would lead him/her to take the comment seriously. 114, you're right and are obviously knowledgable about this topic, but why are you treating jazzy jazz like a terrible person for not knowing a fact like that? It's not necessarily common knowledge, especially if you're life is never connected to rape in any way. I'm positive he was not trying to offend anyone or be disrespectful, and I don't see why what he said is offensive. A little wrong, yes, but you can correct without being so critical

Yeah, I didn't get it so what? You don't have to be like that. I didn't know that. I feel bad for making you guys mad but I sure as hell don't deserve your shit. So back off.

I lied in that i didn´t get the original message not in what I meant to say. You are bitching because you didn´t get what I meant. Now I get that it was sarcasm from your part. I said before that I felt bad because I made you guys mad and you still kept giving me shit...

Actually when I first read docs message, I was thinking, what **** how stupid are you, then all of a sudden I remembered this was by doc. Man did I think I was stupid for a moment.

KiiwiiRox 6

Well then something must be wrong with 99% of women's vags.

agonydrum 7


KiddNYC1O 20


KiiwiiRox 6

Vaginas. I wasn't aware if you could say that or not.

Yet another person left behind in the education system.

It's just a fact that people with less education are more likely to have a lot of kids and people with higher education have less.

I can understand that someone does not know perfectly how the body from a person of the other gender works. It's the 'yet again' part that concerns me.