Today, I woke up to what I thought was my 9 month old son breastfeeding. It was my boyfriend. According to him, he wanted to experience what his mother never gave him as a kid. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML
Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML
Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML
Today, while watching home videos with my family, I saw a clip of me as an infant attempting to breast feed from my father while he laughed uncontrollably. Now, my son keeps sneaking his baby brother's head under my shirt while I'm asleep. The last time he actually began to suckle. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, I was woken up by my teenage son pulling down my shirt and taking pictures of my breasts. FML
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was the first time in four months since our baby was born, that I could really enjoy it. After we finished up we walked into the livingroom, where my white faced brother was sitting. He said we left the baby monitor on. FML
Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML
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Top comments
VVeetard 8
milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...
victoriaax3 0
Atleast it wasn't a hobo .
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Comments (365)
brian666 4
how's this an fml?
jayemdoubleyou 1
Creepy.
juntu 0
yes!
Hwikek 2
I don't know how to vote on this trial, can you guys say whether it should be guilty or not guilty?
Hwikek 2
Wow, just, wow
Anonymoouse_fml 0
if a baby doesn't get breastfed it dies.....
monnanon 13
Formula is a brilliant invention although I would have breast fed if i could. Even if we had never invented formula and you found you couldn't breastfeed you could still use a wet nurse.
Night7 0
that's funny. not going to lie I don't know a guy who hasn't who hasn't wanted to try it
BellyDancinCheer 0
hahahah thats kindaa funny
EJ2 0
Has anyone else noticed she said she woke up to what she thought was her none month old son breastfeeding? Last time I checked, you're usually awake if you're breastfeeding a child and if you're not...parent fail.
StrangeCandy 0
Shows how much you know about breastfeeding. You don't have to be awake to breastfeed a kid, especially if the child sleeps in the same bed with you, which is perfectly normal.
MuchDance90s 0
babies sometimes nurse while their mothers sleep heck sometimes both the infant and mother are sleeping
ladyvidel 19
You don't have to be awake to nurse your kid. Just have the kid in bed with you or strapped in a sling.
mscaramel33 2
my daughter is 27 months old and still nurses. it is a personal/physical decision how long you can nurse for. personal for how long you want and physical for how long you're able to. and you dont have to be awake for your baby to nurse especially if you co-sleep like I did with my daughter.
megan251 0
ewww that's gross