Today, I woke up to what I thought was my 9 month old son breastfeeding. It was my boyfriend. According to him, he wanted to experience what his mother never gave him as a kid. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML
Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML
Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML
Today, while watching home videos with my family, I saw a clip of me as an infant attempting to breast feed from my father while he laughed uncontrollably. Now, my son keeps sneaking his baby brother's head under my shirt while I'm asleep. The last time he actually began to suckle. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, I was woken up by my teenage son pulling down my shirt and taking pictures of my breasts. FML
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was the first time in four months since our baby was born, that I could really enjoy it. After we finished up we walked into the livingroom, where my white faced brother was sitting. He said we left the baby monitor on. FML
Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML
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Top comments
VVeetard 8
milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...
victoriaax3 0
Atleast it wasn't a hobo .
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Comments (365)
ednardlian 3
lol don't take me wrongly but it sounds so cute! lol
nissanman_fml 16
Holy moly, I've never seen so many moderated comments in a single FML before. Can someone enlighten me as to what was said? I mean, besides the fact that it was a religious debate of sorts.
Cheesehead72 0
..does your baby normally decide to start breastfeeding while you're asleep?
HumboldtLeaky 0
If she co-sleeps, sure. She just has to sleep topless and her son can find her breast and start nursing.
ice723 5
good for him, i got next!
jimmartin 0
I love ******* and milk
lationas 25
How is this a FML? It just kinda funny:p I would've just laughed at it:)
texasgal58_fml 0
weird...
lifesabeach1213 7
Why is your nine month old still breast feeding?
styphon 5
shows how little you know. the who and the aap recommend at least 12 months of breast feeding
HumboldtLeaky 0
Maybe because a nine month old baby still needs breastmilk? AAP recommends one, WHO recommends two years of breastfeeding.
purple_sarah88 0
Really? That's your first question, not why her boyfriend is breastfeeding but why her baby is! As HumboldtLeaky says WHO recommends breastfeeding till 2, it's healthy.
monnanon 13
They may have reccomened that before but I know in Britain that they have retracted all their statements on breastfeeding and they are now wondering if it causes more allergies. My advice is not to listen to all those supposed medical bodies. Breast feed or formula feed for as long as you want, they baby will let you know when they want to start weaning onto solids and let go of milk a bit. *hint* when they start to chew your breast to bits its time for solids lol.
mscaramel33 2
my daughter is 27 months old and still nurses. it is a personal/physical decision how long you can nurse for. personal for how long you want and physical for how long you're able to. and breastmilk tasted sweet to my daughters dad and I.
locked_on 0
that's pretty hot if you ask me ;)
Gladus_likes_cak 6
trolling? I wasn't trying to troll just asking if anyone understands you