Today, I woke up to the sound of someone having sex in the room next to me. I don't have a roommate. Turns out my mom thought I was out of town and used her extra key to bring a guy over for sex. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend snuck out of my room so he could have sex with my mom in the next room. FML
Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML
Today, I listened to my roommate having sex from 3 a.m. until 6 a.m. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML
Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML
Today, I came home to find out my roommate had sex in my bed, because he didn't want his date to know he has a smaller bed. FML
Today, I was sending some dirty texts to my boyfriend, when I heard a knocking sound coming through the wall. I sat there for ten minutes before I realized I was listening to my mom and her boyfriend having sex. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML
Today, I was awoken by the sound of my dorm roommate having sex three feet from me. He was sober, knew I was there, and has a deployed military girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
bacincheeseburge 9
is she still married to your dad?
brutal_banger 10
and that's why you give her the key when your really going away
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Comments (101)
rawr_forever 0
that's discusting OP I'm sorry...
troubleinharlem 0
gross, but was he at least good, from what you could tell? sloppy seconds, maybe. ;) and nice, #10. xD
bbaswiii 0
that freaking sux.. nastyy.. did u walk in on her? what happened??
carteran06 0
nice. lol
Aeropostale_Guy 0
Ohhhh how lovely...
shananigans 0
Well at least she was nice enough to not have sex in your bed... But what's wrong with her own house? Unless she's having an affair...
pdaredevil 0
I feel embarassed asking this but what is a milf?
TRJADN 0
MILF - Mom I'd Like to ****. Simple.
pdaredevil 0
Thanks for clarifying.
maa_rico 4
ur welcome u eleven year old girl
00pedro00 0
hahaha
x_HELLo_tHERE_x 0
Why would you be embarrassed? This is FML, feel free to type whatever.......PANCAKES!!!
dorkside_fml 0
because people like to make fun of people who don't know things. they think it makes them look cool.
ArentICute 0
Oh yes, he's 11 because he doesn't know what a word is.
SmokinGuns 13
I don't know about you, but I'd rather someone ask what a word meant than hearing them use it incorrectly.
LTMcleod 0
i'd be like.. " mom, can you make me a sammitch?"
michael666 7
shut up.
ComMed 0
remind her how you like your pancakes and have her make both of you breakfast next time.
storms_fml 0
that's nice I'm sry