Money: Today, I woke up to my boyfriend jumping on my bed exclaiming...

By Ecce - 10/07/2010 12:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend jumping on my bed exclaiming that he had "won the lottery." He broke the bed. Turns out he only won £15.80. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 554

You deserved it 3 205

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 17/05/2011 17:34 - United States

Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 801

You deserved it 28 394

By Anonymous - 11/10/2010 09:07 - Canada

Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 378

You deserved it 6 082

By -_- - 30/08/2013 20:31 - United States - Lahaina

Today, I woke up to a warm bed, the morning sunlight bathing my face, and my boyfriend sneaking my credit card out of my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 056

You deserved it 4 069

By Anonymous - 11/04/2009 16:13 - United States

Today, my Dad called me to tell me that he had finally won the lottery and that I no longer had to worry about trying to find a way to pay for school. I was so excited I started crying. He then told me that he won $5 on a scratch off lotto ticket. He bought a sandwich. Funny dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 453

You deserved it 9 156

So close

By Anonymous - 20/07/2022 06:00

Today, not only did my ex-wife take everything in our divorce, my most recent lottery ticket was off by only one number, I would have won millions and she wouldn’t have been entitled to a penny. Oh well, back to sleeping in my caravan, which is all I have left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 145

By AJShow80 - 13/04/2009 08:51 - United States

Today, I won 20 dollars on a lotto scratch off. My friend, pissed, makes me split the money, saying it was collateral for the gas money used to get us there. He then used his 10 dollars on a scratch off, and won 500 dollars. The jackass wouldn't split it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123 241

You deserved it 18 231

By steveinnewsoh - 18/01/2009 19:12 - United States

Today, I went to get a scratch off lottery ticket, and the dude in front of me got the same one I was going to get. He won 500 dollars. I got 2 bucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 991

You deserved it 2 946

Return to lender

By Anonymous - 31/03/2022 21:00 - United Kingdom - Norwich

Today, I woke up and found a trail of £5 notes in my bedroom, which led all the way downstairs and into the bathroom. I got to the last one, where I was then kicked in the balls from behind. It was my sister. She said it was the money she'd borrowed from me. I was left in my underwear writhing in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 310

You deserved it 150

A Dog's Love = Priceless

By Sudokori - 29/08/2017 20:00

Today, I bought a lottery ticket. Two hours ago, I found out that the ticket was worth $100. Five minutes ago, I found my dog eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 375

You deserved it 651

By SwingingChili - 27/10/2015 05:49

Today, to prove a point to my brother that playing the lotto isn't a sure thing. I got a $10 scratcher. Thinking I'd get nothing or maybe just another scratcher, I ended up winning a free scratcher plus $100. The second scratcher I got an additional $50. Now he's even more confident to win every time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 651

You deserved it 4 650

ArtIsResistance7 1

Saturday 10 July 2010 19:30

Well, if I've learned anything from MacGyver, £15, a blanket, and some duct tape, will make a pretty sweet hammock...

chocolatedrop 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 19:26

how much is that n dollars?

Comments

nikemike 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:12

haha

dabowlingman 14

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:19

you deserved it for using £ instead of $.. USA ftw

allen20 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:30

anyone know what ftw means?

ZombieDios 1

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:36

ftw = **** the world >.> yeeeeessss...he/she will believe that

ibanez370 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 21:47

its for the win .. lol :)

duranharold 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:32

how much is that in dollars

fadingaway 17

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:33

How much is that in rands?

zolltf 4

Saturday 17 July 2010 22:31

how much is that in gold mario coins?

nixonskatel 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:38

46 FTW haha

crackerkilla 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:52

stupid nigga

jmoose311 3

Saturday 10 July 2010 20:57

You shouldn't be sleeping with boys before you're married. YDI.

nerdsgetmehot 22

Saturday 10 July 2010 21:00

#53 That is so entirely irrelevant. OP said nothing about having sex with him-- and besides, not everyone shares your views.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Sunday 11 July 2010 17:52

Ugh, AGAIN with this?! Protip: If you're going to play the self-righteous troll role, the better approach here would be "YDI for gambling."

thefull9yards 4

Saturday 10 July 2010 21:01

same thing happened to me for $4

ashleytiffany 0

Saturday 10 July 2010 21:20

possibly f the world?

Keywords

Work Management Awkward Friends Miscellaneous Healthy Lifestyle Health Relatable Mother in law Gifts Birthday Family Money Public freakouts Education Parents Pranks Students Exams Weird Love AITA Argument Fear Insects Skincare Cats Job interview Jealousy Gross

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Today, my girlfriend decided to pleasure me with a handjob. It was incredibly painful because she didn't understand that my foreskin isn't as flexible as she thought it to be. I didn't have the heart to tell her to stop until she asked, "Is it supposed to turn this color?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 140

You deserved it 12 374

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation, to find my fiance had cleaned the house top to bottom, and finished three projects he was constantly putting off. I was over the moon, until he said, "Yeah, when you're not nagging me all day, I can actually get shit done. Crazy, huh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 666

The Top

Today, at Christmas dinner, my grandmother talked about the death of every single dog she ever had. All 10 of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 135

You deserved it 2 755

Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 606

You deserved it 4 953

Today, I was reading my students' Halloween stories I made them write for my creative writing class in high school. One of my students wrote about attacking me. She got my street address perfect and everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 988

You deserved it 4 531

Today, I learned the hard way that if you're going to pour bleach on bugs to kill them, you need to be prepared for them to fly up and try to attack your face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 643

You deserved it 38 429

Today, I was stopped and questioned by two officers for walking on a public trail in broad daylight. Someone (I think it was the older woman with the two dogs I saw) claimed there was a strange man in a hoodie mumbling to himself. I was wearing a hoodie, but I’m a woman and I was singing along with my music. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 136

Today, I saw the girl that I've had a crush on forever riding her horse on the side of the road. She waved, and without thinking, I honked my horn in response. Her horse bucked her off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 635

You deserved it 17 790

Same thing different taste

So close

Return to lender

A Dog's Love = Priceless

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