Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I ordered two double cheeseburgers from McDonald's and asked for one of them without pickles so they would think I was ordering for two people. Both burgers were for me. FML
Today, I ordered food for delivery. I actually made it sound as if there were other people at home so I had an excuse for ordering so much. I don't think they bought it. FML
Today, I stopped at a mini-mart and bought a family-size bag of potato chips, a tub of dip, a box of toaster pastries, and some snack cakes. The guy at the counter said, "Wow, someone's hungry!" I told him it wasn't all for me, paid, and left in a huff. It was all for me. I ate it all by that evening. FML
Today, I ordered takeout. When I looked in the bag, I saw they'd included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, then estimated that there must be at least four people eating such a large meal. I was eating alone. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me while placing her order. I work as a Drive-Thru cashier at McDonalds. FML
Today, I ordered a large stuffed crust supreme pizza for myself. When I picked it up, I asked for extra plates and napkins so the cashier wouldn't know I don't have any friends. FML
Today, I went through a drive-thru and ordered enough food for three people. The cashier asked if I needed extra napkins “for the group.” I panicked and said, “Yes, for the kids in the back.” There are no kids. Just me, alone, eating like a human trash compactor. FML
Today, I tried to flirt with the cute cashier at my usual drive-thru. Instead of saying, "Thank you," I panicked and said, "I love you." Now I have to find a new favorite burger place. FML
Today, I ordered a plain cheeseburger. The cashier was confused, so I explained, "Just meat and cheese." When I got my food, my burger didn't have a bun. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML
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Top comments
arhanes 0
why even lie about it. doubt she cared
happyk 0
The cashier might have thought they were for other people anyways. Why would the cashier care? It's none of her/his business.
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Comments (231)
mona_is_here 10
you could have shared them with me!!:)
Jsalcedo23 0
no one to blame but ur self
ily1210 10
holy shit. i rly hope you werent expecting any sympathy. but god dam. gl with your lifee, if you eat like that
doodles88 0
control yourself lmao but who cares
Cinn_fml 23
Erm, why is this an FML? You shouldn't do something you're ashamed of, that's just silly. And if you're FMLing about how you don't have a girlfriend, well, go and do something about it rather than sitting at home eating cheeseburgers... Unless of course this was a one off, in which case I doubt it'd be an fml.
rlerke 0
cinn, for **** sake, must you write a paragraph for every fml you comment on? your like Dr Phil.
Raleigh_bruh 7
*you're And all of Cinn's comments make more sense, and are way more enjoyable to read than anything I've ever seen you write.
Cinn_fml 23
Thank you Raleigh. And rlerke, if you paid so much attention to my comments you'd know that occaisionally I only say a sentence. Also, if it bothers you so much, don't read them. :P
jordan75_fml 0
fat people ruin everything XD
rottentomatoes 7
you sad sad person :( i hope you'll find someone from your caliber
illmatic2 16
Who said he is fat?
ilovelife_01 0
LOL! I wonder when I order large amount food @ drive-thru, if the cashier thinks if it's all for me or what.. LOL.. Funny
Raleigh_bruh 7
Yeh. I could eat about five cheeseburgers by myself, just depends on Op's metabolism I guess.