Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML
Hobbitgate
Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure ahead of my cousin's wedding. The woman doing my nails asked if I wanted my toe hairs trimmed. I was so taken aback and embarrassed that I said yes. They charged me extra. FML
Today, I was with a wedding party getting manicures. I absentmindedly used a freshly-painted nail to pick my nose and ended up with two beauticians scraping indestructible bright red gel varnish out of my left nostril with acetone soaked q-tips, while everyone sat waiting in complete silence. FML
What the…
Today, at my annual checkup, the doc looks down at my foot and says, "Oh, you have an extra toenail. Six, huh?" Then sort of scraping at the side of my foot below the pinky toe, he pulls off a long piece of dead, dried skin and says, "Oh." FML
Today, I went to get my first manicure. While waiting, I looked at the menu board. When I wondered aloud: "I know what a French manicure is, but what on Earth is a Polish change?" The whole place started laughing and I guess I'm not going back. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought this hot pink Chanel nail polish. Bored, she thought it would be funny to paint my nails. I finally gave in and let her paint my toe nails. After she left, my buddy calls to to see if I can give him a ride. I forgot I had a swim meet today. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML
Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML
Special interests
Today, my boyfriend told me how he used to collect little things when he was younger. He then decided to tell me about his current big toe nail collection. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure to cheer myself up. I've been so lonely, I got overly excited when someone sat next to me, because I got to pretend I had a friend. FML
Top comments
EvilPotato 15
File a complaint on their asses!
iRoc46n2 4
Just tell them you're genetically superior
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Comments (203)
VooDooCarrie91 19
I have a pinky toe that rides on the toe next to it but I don't let it stop me from pampering myself. Just think, OP. Some people have some nasty feet that they go to get cleaned. I'm sure they've seen worse!
notepie 6
I would have punched him in the face and walked out without paying them
wifeyHo2011 1
Let me guess he was Asian ? Let me say that it was immature of him but it's rare for some of them to laugh or whatever . One thing is that some Asian thinks everyone is born without any problems like u have . Just tell them before hand
alwayswinning123 7
Kick him where it hurts!
megusta3 5
Kill yourself.
lazrus_fml 2
Yeah my whole family has webbed toes, too! This happened to my sister.
lostfaithinpppl 19
That is not very professional, OP. I agree with previous comments. File a complaint of some kind.
jeffmusson1309 1
You don't have to feel self concise about it. My grandpa cut off 2 of his toes with a lawn mower so he only has 3 on one foot
skyeyez9 25
On the positive, OP learned a fairly significant percentage of the fml community has or knows someone with webbed toes. You aren't alone. I used to be self conscious about my nose (I broke it roughhousing with my friend and my parents never took me to the doctor to get it set so it healed crooked) I had plastic surgery once I was old enough and saved enough money to have it fixed. If your toes bother you, you can look into getting it fixed.
redhair_love 2
Guess you can't wear toed socks, OP.
Quiet_one 22
I really hope you didn't leave a tip and that you make some kind of formal complaint to the owner/manager of the business. Someone that unprofessional should not have a job that involves coming in contact with other people.