Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML
Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure ahead of my cousin's wedding. The woman doing my nails asked if I wanted my toe hairs trimmed. I was so taken aback and embarrassed that I said yes. They charged me extra. FML
Today, I was with a wedding party getting manicures. I absentmindedly used a freshly-painted nail to pick my nose and ended up with two beauticians scraping indestructible bright red gel varnish out of my left nostril with acetone soaked q-tips, while everyone sat waiting in complete silence. FML
Today, at my annual checkup, the doc looks down at my foot and says, "Oh, you have an extra toenail. Six, huh?" Then sort of scraping at the side of my foot below the pinky toe, he pulls off a long piece of dead, dried skin and says, "Oh." FML
Today, I went to get my first manicure. While waiting, I looked at the menu board. When I wondered aloud: "I know what a French manicure is, but what on Earth is a Polish change?" The whole place started laughing and I guess I'm not going back. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought this hot pink Chanel nail polish. Bored, she thought it would be funny to paint my nails. I finally gave in and let her paint my toe nails. After she left, my buddy calls to to see if I can give him a ride. I forgot I had a swim meet today. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML
Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me how he used to collect little things when he was younger. He then decided to tell me about his current big toe nail collection. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure to cheer myself up. I've been so lonely, I got overly excited when someone sat next to me, because I got to pretend I had a friend. FML
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Top comments
EvilPotato 15
File a complaint on their asses!
iRoc46n2 4
Just tell them you're genetically superior
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Comments (203)
believe_alanis 8
nothing to be shame of !!!
aliabchal 7
You truly made my day. Don't worry about it your special just like my dad was :)
brookemurray17 5
Damn Asians
RoBi1475 0
honestly, i would have got up right then and there and left with out paying. You don't treat costomers like that I dont care who you think you are.
RoxxyHustle 7
hahahah! I'm not laughing AT you OP I'm laughing with you! I have this condition as well. I've never had a nail tech make mention of it except once; the woman was wrapping the toe separators and felt the need to hold my toe and waggle my foot about and demand "WHERE YOU TOE HUH?! WHERE YOU TOE?!!!" all I could do was laugh. Wear those webby toes OP, wear 'em proudly!! :-)
snafu63 0
And did you call the manager and demand an apology and free service? because you should have
wolfgirl18 3
That is so messed up!!! FYL
SSx0x25 0
wow i would of punch the guy ! dont worry not everyone is perfect
MistyEyed05 4
You could put surgical tape around them and just say they are broken.... Then you won't see that they are connected.
ChubbyNicki 6
You should have posted the name of the place. I'm sure you're not the only person where you live who gets on FML. That shit would hit like wildfire and they would either lose all their business or have to fire those bastards.